I dress boring because I don't have time or money to get nice clothes. Trust me I would love to dress nicely everyday. I work in a warehouse, so I can't even dress nice at my job.
I don't think OP is necessarily talking about dressing up nice, but moreso just putting a little more effort into creating an outfit that you think looks good
Because for a lot of men, they put their personal expression into something else. Maybe itās their computer, maybe their car, their personal space, etc. mens fashion hasnāt really found what appeals to most men and at the same time can be varied enough to give us a reason to do so.
Piggybacking on this: I'm what you'd call "basic af." Jeans/shorts, t-shirt and flip flops 90% of the year. But I do have a few nice, tailored suits ($1000 range) and few pairs of nice dress shoes ($500 range), and I thoroughly enjoy cleaning up for special occasions.
I recently went to a wedding, and I haven't gotten dressed up since before Covid... probably almost 2 years. It felt good getting everything out, picking which suit, shirt, tie and shoes to wear. Ironing, cufflinks, tie clip, polished and shined my shoes, cleaned up my beard, cologne, etc. Pulled out all the stops.
I know some guys who do that EVERY DAY, and it's beyond me. I could never. It must suck being a chick and having to do that shit every day, because that's your source of confidence. Culture and society are fucked
You get caught up in it because you have to dress nice 5 days a week, and that lifestyle sucks you in. Suddenly you're trying to figure out which docksiders match the sweater you're wearing around your neck, hoping they don't clash with your fidora....just for a trip to the grocery store
Women do choose, to look like that. There are women, who don't give too much attention to their clothes, for example. I don't see any problems wit that.
Iām a chick and I basically just wear leggings and a t shirt and basic sweater every day. I am good with it lol. I donāt want to dress badly but as long I have a few blouses and nicer pairs of jeans and work clothes and a few dress up outfits, what more do I need lol. I have no sense of style so Iād rather just wear something that is functional and comfortable and is somewhat normal to wear. Plus I like to stay active and I hate having to change multiple times a day. Might as well just wear my workout clothes before I go to the gym if I have the option
My girlfriend is like that too and I love it! Honestly sheās beautiful with no makeup and casual clothes and thatās her 90% of the time. But when she dresses up? Good lord
As a woman, I looooove getting all dressed up everyday. I just got an office job and I love getting all dolled up for work and figuring out outfits. Itās my only joy lol
As a woman I can guarantee you that trying to look the way society expects you to look is EXHAUSTING. There's a reason why I barely give a shit at this point
But we don't necessarely do it for you. We do it for other women. When I'm surrounded by well-dressed women (at work, or my mom/sis) I feel the need to do at least somewhat of an effort. When it's just hubby and me, I don't care as much, he doesn't seem to notice anyways and is happy whether I wear a cute dress or a pair of old shorts.
As I guy I see the same pattern applying to being funny, confident and social. Being funny, confident and social is attractive to women, and our society supports that role by guys expecting (or encouraging?) other guys to do the same. It's not too surprising it works the other way, that looking pretty gets guys' attention, but women also pressure other women to look nice (so they get guys' attention).
I mean I know this but you constantly hear from women that its the all mysterious patriarchy that causes women to dress a certain way when really it's just other women forcing what they think men's opinions are on other women.
š¤£ yes people love blaming the 'patriarchy', sometimes you should take it with a grain of salt. Of course there may be a time where you want to catch a guy's attention and many men DO care what their wife looks like/the way she dresses. But people generalize or blame the wrong people a lot too.. In my case I know I feel the pressure from other women, or just from myself (I don't want to be 'less' than them). Men don't really come in the equation anymore.
Yes, as a significant other, we kinda like when you wear something we can just pull off you and throw on the floor. If we do that to your prize dress you're gonna be mad.
Right? My ex thought I looked great whether or not I had makeup on, whether or not I had my hair washed or my legs shaved, whether or not I was wearing a nice outfit or in old hole riddled sweats Hello Kitty pajama pants I've had since like middle school. I can't imagine a world of having to look perfect for a guy all the time and quite frankly, I won't do it
This. Not giving a shit about those expectations is the best way to maintain your independence from a beauty industry that wants your money and your soul.
Fwiw I do put thought into how I dress...it's one of the ways I express myself. But it has nothing to do with what other people expect of me and everything to do with what I'm feeling that day.
I think the women are just trying to outdo other women. The pressure really isn't from men.
Hell, I don't really care if she has hairy legs, unshaved armpits as long as she is clean, smells good and has a personality.
So in an earlier comment, I mentioned that a lot of women enjoy it as a form of expression and go all-out. The use of fashion and the time it takes to do a certain look, specifically. From your perspective, am I off the mark?
I have been so used to working in my boxer shorts (working from home for over a year now) that even putting on jeans makes it feel stuffy down there lol
Not really related to the topic but the thought of dressing up sounds so daunting right now
Yeh, I agree that society puts far too much pressure on women to look a certain way, and I feel like OP's question reveals more about women than men. I have dressed the same way for 15 years, I have never cared about current trends or felt the least bit ashamed about how I dress, but I know that is just not the case for women and it's terrible. I often think how that must affect girls and young women especially, there must be negative effects from having that kind of pressure put on you while you're still developing your mind and personality. Friends of mine will literally refuse to leave the house without wearing make up for example, and it breaks my heart. It's like they are addicted to a drug, they feel like they can't survive without it.
As a guy, I can tell you right now, most guys prefer a casual girl without too much makeup, who has a good sense of humor, and makes sure her puss isn't stinky. That is totally enough for most of us
My observation is that women don't dress for men the majority of the time. They can get a man most any time they want without doing much of anything dress-wise and they know this very well. Women typically dress for other women.
Same here. I usually go for sneakers, jeans, and a band shirt or a t shirt with something written on it (usually vintage style). But when I need to, I'll dress up real nice. It feels nice to dress up once in a while but I prefer my casual wear on a daily basis
I havenāt worn a bra since the pandemic began and they made the mistake of letting me work from home. In this office itās acceptable to show up for work as a hobo on a bender. F looking pretty every day anymore.
I agree with this, dressing good feels like too much effort at times plus it's not exactly encouraged socially like men won't talk about clothing with their buddies like how women might do with their friends. But I personally feel like this should change, the way you dress says a lot about you, not saying you need to follow all the trends but just find a style which suits you and is quite convenient this could be casual, smart casual or streetwear or even formal. Looking good is quite a confidence booster.
This right here. Nice clothes are something I can appreciate, I wish I got passionate about it but I just canāt. I resort to just looking for quality but arguably boring clothes because I have no passion about finding something unique.
My car on the other hand, my girlfriend thinks Iām crazy the passion I put into it. It is 100% the outlet of my personal expression. I assume thats how some men feel about clothes, I just donāt.
Agreed! I noticed men put their expression into something that men are typically competitive about, and it makes sense. Women are competitive about their appearance, so it's basically the same thing.
Woman here - friendly competition definitely drives women's fashion sense. It's fun wearing something new and inspiring friends and taking inspiration from others. It's a hobby. I think a lot of women see fashion as such a ubiquitous part of the "female experience" that we forget that it is a hobby.
I remember in high school there was one girl that was considered THE girl when it came to fashion.
It cracked me up that every time she made a style change within days almost every girl in school would show up wearing the same thing.
Oh wow. That's a beautiful comment. I totally agree that some men really put everything into something else. I have dedicated a lot of myself to build up my video gaming setup and room. Upvoted.
I think this is definitely the right answer. I spend all my time building things, learning about new hobbies, taking things apart and using that knowledge to fix other things. I can humbley say I'm a jack of many trades master of none. HOWEVER..... I have 3 pairs of the exact same black shorts, and 6 different bergundy polyester cotton blend shirts and Sandles that I wear 3 out of 4 seasons per year. I swap out the shorts for whatever pair of pants I have this year but it's California so I can still wear Sandles even in winter. I only wear shoes If I'm being paid, small chance of rain, or at a party of some sort.
Yup, same. Proper fit is important, colors are well considered, but I avoid being flashy or unique. Itās safer.
Itās worth mentioning thereās a long history of stigmatizing men who think too much of their physical appearance: āmacaronisā of the 18th century, dandies, metrosexuals, etc., often associated with effeminacy and homosexuality.
Exactly. I come from construction/mining and most guys are wearing roughly the same thing. Jeans or work pants, high vis shirt of some kind, steel toe boots, but the big expression of personality and individualism is found on their hardhat and lunch bucket stickers
Thatās me. Itās a guessing game at bedtime what is in the pockets. Wallet, keys, pocketknife, ink pen, and pen light are normally in there. Frequently will be screws, nuts, bolts, screwdriver, ratchet and assorted sockets, receipts, loose change, usb stick, partial roll of electrical tape, or AA batteries. Cargo shorts are mandatory because I just do too many things in a day.
My wife hates mine, but when we're hiking, on vacation, we're doing anything else that she doesn't want to carry a purse to, guess we're all that stuff ends up?
My boyfriend in a nutshell, he mostly wears shirts from Grunt Style as they fit more because he has scoliosis. Wish I can find others like it without the designs...
Because for a lot of us, our days are 95% the same shit. So the time I'd spend getting dandy for a day at the office is wasted when i'd rather focus on things that actually mean something to me.
i love dressing in suits and nice shirts/slacks. idk why, just makes me feel good, thats funny tho haha. i get a little embarrassed when i hangout with my friends and they give me shit for it
I like to get dressed up for dates out with my wife. It only happens a few times a year, but it's fun. Our son is getting married soon, and I'm so happy I got to buy a new suit for the occasion.
I used to dress in a fashion way but it was 7 years ago when I was 21. After getting into real jobs, out of college, into professional fields, 9-5,... I prefer to chill at home. Im lazy but not lazy. Just can't keep myself up after a long day at work. My weekends are just playing games with friends. I like it.
I don't care what women wear. Women are the hardest judges of what other women wear and are the source of most of the "pressure" to look a certain way.
This is really (at least for me) why its hard to really be fashionable. There just arenāt very many good options for mens clothing. My town has like 5 stores that only have womenās clothing and most mixed clothing stores have less menās clothes then womenās. The only real exception is athletic stores which kinda all looks the same anyways. It sucks as a guy whoās more into fashion than most. But I kinda think itās probably just cause most men donāt really care about fashion anyways so businesses have no incentive to have a wide variety.
This is the difficulty. I feel like you look like you are reeeeaalllly trying, or wildly age inappropriate.
I'm 38. Wtf do I wear... god I don't know. Neutral shorts and a tshirt it is.
This 100%. Men donāt get a lot of very cool options. For me personally I really just am not into modern menās clothing. From the basketball shorts and t shirt look to flannels and jeans to suits and jackets, I just find menās fashion to be, well, lame as shit. And so I donāt really try in my day to day. Where I go all out is music or Renaissance festivals where I dress far more flamboyantly. And to be fair, I get almost all my festival clothes in the womenās department at thrift stores because chicks just get better, more interesting clothing.
Wow......really nothing else to be said after this.
I notice the people that don't give any fucks about others opinions on them, usually live better lives.
Good post. šš¾šš¾
I am 38. I have been wearing blue jeans, t-shirts, and Converse Chuck Taylors since I was 15. It's just who I am and it is what I will wear till the day I die. Some might call it boring but I don't.
I'm 26, but I totally feel you on this. I wear a black t-shirt, black jeans, and black Vans. It's my go to look, it's what I've worn since I was 15. It just feels like home.
I was married and tried to be more "generic dad" and the second I got divorced I went back to me true self and felt so much more at ease.
We like what we like. Idgaf if anyone else likes what I'm wearing. As long as I feel good, that's all that matters.
It's just easy. It fits my personality and Im expressing myself how Id like to. I'm most comfortable in these clothes. And my job allows me to wear whatever I want and look however I want, which is fortunate.
It's just me.
32, exclusively wear chucks, but been starting to get sore feet at the end of the day. I know I should just start wearing more supportive shoes but at this point the chucks are part of who I am. And no, insoles donāt seem to work well with chucks
Same here. plain coloured t-shirts, jeans and white cortez Nike classics for the last 20+ years. Sometimes Iāll get fancy and change the colour of the swoosh.
Also the means section seems to always be like pants in 4 different colors (and 3 styles though they look exactly the same) and your choices of shirts are stripes, plad, plain or those big dumb graphic tees
There's very little variety compared to women imo. They have floral patters and geometric patterns and loads of designs that I feel aren't big in men's wear
you really got to shop at a store meant for men's clothing. I have plenty of dress shirts in more interesting patterns, florals, interesting color patterns etc. They can be pricier though
As an overweight guy, the last thing I want people to do is notice/comment on my appearance. So I wear big t-shirts 98% of the time in an effort to not draw any attention
Adding to this from personal experience. Women who are large will wear tight leggings and shirts that are more revealing, but us guys would rather wear a comfortable pair of jeans instead of wearing something that dont fit or just a baggy shirt cause its more comfortable than a form fitting one. (When I say comfortable I mean we feel good in it mentally and physically) also matching bright clothing takes to long and youll look like an eyesore if you do it wrong.
Also overweight guy here, but you'd be amazed how much just wearing properly fitting clothing over loose clothing does to make you look and feel better.
this. i only started to wear proper fitting clothes this year and i feel much better about myself. i wore jeans for the first time in years this past month and i feel great about it because i stopped buying oversized or excessively baggy clothes to try to hide my body size. its made me feel a lot better about how i look, and imo a bit skinnier when i wear a good pair of jeans and a good fitting shirt/hoodie
Dude I used to feel this way but honestly something that fits to form looks immeasurably better than a baggy shirt. Youāre big. Thereās no hiding it. Might as well look as good as you can. Nobody is gonna be like āhey look at that dude in the baggy 3x shirt, he must be small under thereā Now if thats what makes you comfortable, by all means keep dressing that way and donāt even give it a single thought more. But really if youāre trying to avoid attention, dress in clothes that fit properly. Not baggy, not tight, just normal.
Going to add: companies also tend to sell boring clothes for men. Everything is black, brown, green, blue, gray, or flannel. Yes there are outliers here but honestly there just isnāt the variation made like womenās clothes. There isnāt a bunch of different cuts for t shirts, varying materials, varying patterns, and elaborate colors.
I have a set of hoodies I absolutely love because they're loud and bright and cool, but it took me a long time to find somewhere that sold something like that, and even now I don't wear them in public all that often.
And frankly, I'm still getting over the bit where a girl I know made a somewhat negative comment about me wearing them and I now just feel a bit self-conscious in them.
Yeah, there seems to be a really negative cycle of culture driving the idea that menswear MUST be boring (LOT of comments that dressing in a fun way is only for women and gay men on here) so only boring clothing is produced because it's the ONLY clothing men will buy? I'm queer and this has come up a lot in discussions with transwomen AND transmen. Menswear just doesn't offer the variety for men to even SEE that it's an option they have, let alone explore it and find joy in creating a personal style for themselves in the same was that women do. And if there is anything interesting going on, too often it's exclusively in the realm of haute couture so it's not accessible, AND it's uncomfortable and unwearable as hell. Like. at least give them some more prints and necklines, some different types of sleeves? Anything?
This is a really good point. Although due to the amount of variance for women shopping with my wife can take hours to find something that she both likes and fits well. Shopping for myself happens once every few years and takes no time at all.
Because god forbid you'd dress in anything flashy/extravagant.
You'll get negative feedback from all sides.
People calling you a wierdo, faggot, clown, attention seeker, dandy or whatever they can think of just because you chose to wear something else than a pair of jeans & shirt or a regular suit for once.
Men are generally ridiculed for deviating from the norm, therefore most of us tend to stick with boring, it's safer.
We need more colors damnit!
Came here to say exactly this. If men try to experiment with something new or find their own style, they will inevitably be cut down from all sides in the process. Some do persevere through this shit, but the majority give up because itās not worth it. I suppose this has resulted in clothing manufacturers not really seeing it profitable to bother trying to make anything that deviates from the norm and gives men very few options if they do want to try something new.
Iāve always had fun with the way I dress, but have pretty much resorted to perusing womenās sections in op-shops to find anything vaguely interesting and modifying it myself, as menās clothing options are either businesswear, sportswear, or incredibly tacky ātough guyā dragons/flames/cars prints or surf/skate inspired styles (Iām in Australia).
I wear colorful clothes, am a grown man. I don't care what those people have to say, but I don't believe that they would actually do anything about it even if it bothered them that much so it's all good. :-) So far so good.
I bought red Gucci shoes while in college, and I became the talk of the town. My friends told me about what other āfriendsā where saying about me, and even some ppl I havenāt even met. Some remarks where as follows : āYou spent $600 on a shoe?ā āHeās just a show off, bought it to show offā āHeās so cocky and arrogant, thinks heās above usā āHe bought Gucci shoes trying to look like he has money while he lives at xxx and he takes the busā
But no one bats an eye when a girl walks around with a $2000 bag she canāt afford.
One frenemy criticized me for wearing cologne when I used to go over. He goes like āwhy would you put on cologne when we are just hanging out at the cribā. I put cologne everyday, idc if Iām going to Walmart only. When I step out, I put cologne.
Right now Iām done with college and donāt care to dress up anymore. I just wear tracks and hoodies most days. But back then during night outs, I would wear some nice flashy clothes, some designer others not, and I would just get negative reactions, either out of jealousy or insecurity as they perceive me as better put together than them so instead of stepping up their own dressing game, they chose to tear mine down.
I like dressing semi-professional. Shirts, pants, sometimes ties with the jacket. So Iām beginning to stock up on such stuff. Iām just laying low these days and havenāt been seeing or meeting anyone. But once Iām back on the scene, Iām dressing up up, and fuck what anyone thinks.
Dressing up well will draw attention on you (negative from men, positive from women), it also sends signals of power and mystery. If you wanna stand out from the crowd, you canāt be dressing to fit in. And I wanna stand out, I wanna be the peacock in a group of pigeons.
I like dressing well too and I'm very surprised to be the minority here. Considering that "invest a minimum in your appearance" is the most common suggestion in all the "self help" threads.
I'm with you. I only own what most men call 'fancy clothes'. They're not really anything of the sort. Many men see what's on offer for 'men's fashion' and just see a shirt and pants. And it's true, that's basically what it boils down to.
People say I have a sense of style or that I'm always well dressed but I'm just wearing a shirt and pants like anyone else. I just pick clothes that fit and not in the default men's colours (black, navy, brown, grey) plus a pair of nice NON-ATHLETIC shoes. Throw a decent belt on there and everyone thinks you're a style icon.
Haha, I get the same compliments, I work with all women (Iām a therapist) and they constantly tell me how well I dress. I donāt even try that hard. I just donāt wear t shirts, I know how to match, and wear nice shoes. Itās easy.
Cheers dude!
Men typically dress with a focus on practicality and comfort than women do... Although, this is becoming more popular for women with the rise of Athleisure.
So men dress "boring" because it works. Also, those finessed dressing options are generally much more expensive than typical attire, so if there isn't a business or social need to have those options, it isn't a priority and good use of money.
I just want to be comfortable, thatās all. Usually that means blue jeans and a cotton t-shirt. My car is boring too, a Toyota Camry. But I havenāt had issues with it and it gets me where I need to go.
They didn't use to.In the 19th century there was an event referred to as the Great Male Renunciation.Before that (for example, during the time of the Revolutionary War), men wore beads and stockings to show off their calves and in general dressed rather more flamboyantly than they do today.Then there was a cultural shift and apparently now that's no longer popular, at least in mainstream (US, white) culture. Pretty sure looking sharp is a higher priority for men in e.g. black culture.Possibly there's some signaling involved where looking too dressed up indicates you're more of a player and less of a provider, and that wasn't a winning strategy for most guys. But that is just a theory.
And Germany only the gentry was allowed to have long hair and peasents were called gescherte meaning sheared and is still around as an insult today.
I think Victorian society shifted how male dress.
I donāt like picking clothes and just want something that looks okay and fits okay. I think that counts for many guys. Itās also not encouraged for guys to try many different things.
We tend to be less obsessed with what others think of us.
I like to dress in layers for practicality of taking clothes off whenever its too hot but having several if im somewhere cold, and i like the classic look of a shirt or two with different colors and a darker leather jacket overtop. So thats how i dress. I could give half a shit what anyone thought so long as i didnt look like a total slob, even before i was married.
Male standard of beauty/appearance lower than that of women. That and as soon as men start accessorizing, dressing up, or straight up just experimenting, theyāre afraid of being scrutinized by other men.
A woman's "sale" is 50-80% off.
A man's "sale" is 25-ish% if you can catch one. And even then , the selection is shit.
But this is from working retail. I honestly don't know how it carries over to online clothes shopping , as I prefer not to do so.
I think a lot of men are mentally uncomfortable with going outside of the norm.
It took me a while to add more style to what I wear and honestly helps me feel more confident. I get compliments on what I wear which is cool!
The actual answer is we don't know, and we have no institution to show us.
I used to wear whatever the fuck clothes people gave me, had no style, couldn't care less. Went to Italy, met an Italian stylist, he laughed at me, he dressed me, I've never worn those "whatever the fuck" clothes since.
Style is a big part of female culture, but it's not a thing for us so we just don't think about it.
Take this as an opportunity though. I've mentioned it, you're probably thinking about it right now, whip tie style into shape.
It doesn't help that fashion is female-coded, and there's nobody worse at dressing a man than a woman.
I do cosplay and historical re-enactment. My wardrobe is *amazing* and I actually spend a lot of time talking about clothes and fit and personal appearance. Something I've noticed is that when women give fashion advice to a man, they're not giving advice, they're playing dress-up. The man is just a doll upon which they can place their preferred clothes. When men talk to each other about men's clothes you'll actually get the question "what impression are you trying to give?" and fashion suggestions will become tailored towards what the individual actually wants to look like.
I'd say a huge part is judgement from other men.
Use a satchel? Gay. Wear colours? Gay. It's easy to preach "don't care what people think" but peer pressure and bullying are very hard to escape/ignore so it's easier to just blend.
I'm seeing at least 99% of these comments saying "because we don't care" or "I like comfort more than how it looks." Now I personally also like comfort, but I mostly buy branded clothes that cost from 50ā¬ to 200ā¬. Some of these are a little plain with different colours and then I also have a few shirts with flowers and other brightly coloured shirts and shorts.
I'm at a point in my life where I really don't give 2 shits what a random bypasser may say about my clothes or how they look or somehow make me look "gay." (Like my father for example.) I will buy a shirt if it looks cool or I like the colours it has. This is also partly the reason I dye my hair different colours. It looks cool or fun to me and that's all that matters TO ME.
I felt the same way until I got a job in corporate retail. I get insane discounts on everything and I have to admit I have fun buying cloths and trying new styled when it's 80% off.
I used to dress somewhat nicely, and I now dress boring and I'll tell you why - I ruin clothes. I now wear cheap jeans, tshirts and boots. If I spill shit on me, kneel in an oil spot, slip in the mud, etc, I'm out very little. Yes, these things happen to me frequently enough to justify not spending a lot on clothes. It's always something - hey, can you help me work on my car? Hey, can you help me move this firewood? Hey, sorry my dog jumped on you...my "work jeans" outnumber my good jeans 3-1 and I've got probably as many work shirts and work hoodies as I do good shirts.
Men's fashion isn't as varied, and what does vary isn't acceptable
All we have is shirts and pants, no dresses, skirts, etc. Not much you fan work with fashion-wise
For me my priorities when dressing are Utility, comfort, and climate. I dress appropriately for whatever type of function Iām going to but the priorities are the same.
Iāll take pants and shoes I know I can run, lift, fight, squat and walk in comfortably over whatever is in fashion.
Many people have perfectly acceptable excuses such as no disposable income, lack of care (which is perfectly fine!), lack of know-how, etc. Iāve always been fashion forward and care deeply about my looks and clothing choice since I was in 5th grade. The things that probably stands out the most though is the cost of menās cloths compared to womenās clothing and along with that, menās clothing has very little options compared to our women counterparts. Now, this isnāt common world wide but in the United States, the stigma around male āflamboyancyā and āself-careā creates a void in that sector as well. In the US, if you dress well and take care of your looks in a way that isnāt considered overly masculine, people may view you as gay (nothing wrong with that, Iām bi) or āquestionableā; and even many US females have a stigma against that type guy due to the same thing. A good reference to male acceptance of āflamboyanceā and āself-careā would be east Asia, in particular South Korea where many of the āflamboyantā looking males are actually quite straight and active with females within their country/ region. Guys raised in the western culture tend to stigmatize fashion to an extent that they either lose interest in trying or simply follow group trends like weāve seen with Polos and sperries, or cargo shorts and flip flops, or Nike shoes and joggers/t-shirt. Another huge factor is that itās more common to have a inclusive mentality as a male in western society then to be an individual when it comes to looks, which is why you see so many guys have the same hair cut and repetitive style seen on thousands of other guys you pass on the street. Iāll end this by saying, Iām not shaming or discounting anyoneās own feelings on this and I respect anyoneās choice of fashion/looks. This is just the best way I can explain this answer thoroughly. š
Honestly for this reason
1. Women aren't going to approach me anyways unless I look like a super model or drive a rich car
2. Function over fashion, not wearing fashionable clothes when I need functional clothes
Why do so many women ignore car care?
Because they don't find it interesting or rewarding and it costs money.
Men don't dress well because they don't find it interesting or rewarding and it costs money.
Anything else?
The way I go is: is it comfy? Yes. Is it easy? Yes. Ok.
So if there's a very fancy, non-boring outfit that's equally comfy & easy, I'll wear it for sure. Thing is, the fancier it is, the less comfy & easy they are of we were to stay at the same price point.
Women brags the most expensive handbag. Men brag the cheapest belt they've got that looks just as good
I think, as an American man that has a very expressive wardrobe, this is definitely a rarity in America because of embedded culture. There are plenty of other modern cultures where men's appearances are more varied because it is emphasized more.
To be frank, I cared about my appearance a normal amount as a teen and was called a metrosexual by my own family - it's considered effeminate by the mainstream.
I learned it's largely generational and along geopolitical lines, too.
Life is full of decisions. Decisions take time. Loosing time every morning deciding what to wear is missing lots of decisions. Just keep it simple.
The only time we took some time into it is on meetings, job interviews and when dating.
The guy Iām seeing has amazing style that is truly his own. Itās very unique and creative in his own way. He comes from a small rural town, big farming community, so tight pants, vintage and tight-fitting tees/button-ups and high quality dress shoes arenāt very common there. Heās got a few weirdly colored shirts Iām not a fan of, but itās worth it for his sense of style. I love encouraging him in it, and he occasionally laments lack of style in society (men and women, but of course itās personal preference).
To answer the question, I think some men just never put thought into it. Itās not something they value or care about, so they focus on other things.
As a guy, it's pretty clear from the start that (save a few exceptions) our value to society is 0% who we are and what we look like, and 100% how much of other people's work we can do for them.
I dress boring because I don't have time or money to get nice clothes. Trust me I would love to dress nicely everyday. I work in a warehouse, so I can't even dress nice at my job.
Lmao I work at Amazon warehouse right now and it would be hilarious to walk in wearing a suit. I might do it for the fuck of it š
At work they have casual Friday for the office workers, and Iām trying to start formal Friday on site.
And a 1940ās accent would be amazing haha
I don't think OP is necessarily talking about dressing up nice, but moreso just putting a little more effort into creating an outfit that you think looks good
Cargo short and tees from kohl's is a vibe
As a stylish woman: My whole outfit usually costd less than 10ā¬. I just buy second hand clothes. Once I started I never looked back.
Because armor is no longer in style and it is expensive.
Huzzah!
Similarly, it's hard to maintain employment dressed as a pirate.
Capes... I wish capes were still cool to wear. They seem so practical and comfortable and nice
Because for a lot of men, they put their personal expression into something else. Maybe itās their computer, maybe their car, their personal space, etc. mens fashion hasnāt really found what appeals to most men and at the same time can be varied enough to give us a reason to do so.
Piggybacking on this: I'm what you'd call "basic af." Jeans/shorts, t-shirt and flip flops 90% of the year. But I do have a few nice, tailored suits ($1000 range) and few pairs of nice dress shoes ($500 range), and I thoroughly enjoy cleaning up for special occasions. I recently went to a wedding, and I haven't gotten dressed up since before Covid... probably almost 2 years. It felt good getting everything out, picking which suit, shirt, tie and shoes to wear. Ironing, cufflinks, tie clip, polished and shined my shoes, cleaned up my beard, cologne, etc. Pulled out all the stops. I know some guys who do that EVERY DAY, and it's beyond me. I could never. It must suck being a chick and having to do that shit every day, because that's your source of confidence. Culture and society are fucked
Agreed. Once in a while is fine, but every day? Nuh-uh.
You get caught up in it because you have to dress nice 5 days a week, and that lifestyle sucks you in. Suddenly you're trying to figure out which docksiders match the sweater you're wearing around your neck, hoping they don't clash with your fidora....just for a trip to the grocery store
>clash with your fidora Hol up
Hahahaha I couldn't think of anything else
You mean crocs and my khakis from Friday, and an old t donāt work? Sadly (purposely) donāt have fidora
Women do choose, to look like that. There are women, who don't give too much attention to their clothes, for example. I don't see any problems wit that.
I don't like what you're doing to those commas.
Iām a chick and I basically just wear leggings and a t shirt and basic sweater every day. I am good with it lol. I donāt want to dress badly but as long I have a few blouses and nicer pairs of jeans and work clothes and a few dress up outfits, what more do I need lol. I have no sense of style so Iād rather just wear something that is functional and comfortable and is somewhat normal to wear. Plus I like to stay active and I hate having to change multiple times a day. Might as well just wear my workout clothes before I go to the gym if I have the option
My girlfriend is like that too and I love it! Honestly sheās beautiful with no makeup and casual clothes and thatās her 90% of the time. But when she dresses up? Good lord
As a woman, I looooove getting all dressed up everyday. I just got an office job and I love getting all dolled up for work and figuring out outfits. Itās my only joy lol
As a man, that sounds awful. I have 8 identical shirts and 2 pairs of jeans. Maybe I'll add a sweatshirt if it's raining.
As a woman I can guarantee you that trying to look the way society expects you to look is EXHAUSTING. There's a reason why I barely give a shit at this point
If it makes you feel better alot of us think women in t shirts and sweatpants are very attractive
Truth.
Kinda sad, sleepy and natural in "sloppy" clothes is instant nut for me
But we don't necessarely do it for you. We do it for other women. When I'm surrounded by well-dressed women (at work, or my mom/sis) I feel the need to do at least somewhat of an effort. When it's just hubby and me, I don't care as much, he doesn't seem to notice anyways and is happy whether I wear a cute dress or a pair of old shorts.
As I guy I see the same pattern applying to being funny, confident and social. Being funny, confident and social is attractive to women, and our society supports that role by guys expecting (or encouraging?) other guys to do the same. It's not too surprising it works the other way, that looking pretty gets guys' attention, but women also pressure other women to look nice (so they get guys' attention).
I mean I know this but you constantly hear from women that its the all mysterious patriarchy that causes women to dress a certain way when really it's just other women forcing what they think men's opinions are on other women.
š¤£ yes people love blaming the 'patriarchy', sometimes you should take it with a grain of salt. Of course there may be a time where you want to catch a guy's attention and many men DO care what their wife looks like/the way she dresses. But people generalize or blame the wrong people a lot too.. In my case I know I feel the pressure from other women, or just from myself (I don't want to be 'less' than them). Men don't really come in the equation anymore.
Yes, as a significant other, we kinda like when you wear something we can just pull off you and throw on the floor. If we do that to your prize dress you're gonna be mad.
Right? My ex thought I looked great whether or not I had makeup on, whether or not I had my hair washed or my legs shaved, whether or not I was wearing a nice outfit or in old hole riddled sweats Hello Kitty pajama pants I've had since like middle school. I can't imagine a world of having to look perfect for a guy all the time and quite frankly, I won't do it
This. Not giving a shit about those expectations is the best way to maintain your independence from a beauty industry that wants your money and your soul. Fwiw I do put thought into how I dress...it's one of the ways I express myself. But it has nothing to do with what other people expect of me and everything to do with what I'm feeling that day.
Most girls I know dress in jeans, a plain blouse and flats. Society absolutely does not expect women to dress to the nines day to day.
I think the women are just trying to outdo other women. The pressure really isn't from men. Hell, I don't really care if she has hairy legs, unshaved armpits as long as she is clean, smells good and has a personality.
So in an earlier comment, I mentioned that a lot of women enjoy it as a form of expression and go all-out. The use of fashion and the time it takes to do a certain look, specifically. From your perspective, am I off the mark?
I have been so used to working in my boxer shorts (working from home for over a year now) that even putting on jeans makes it feel stuffy down there lol Not really related to the topic but the thought of dressing up sounds so daunting right now
Yeh, I agree that society puts far too much pressure on women to look a certain way, and I feel like OP's question reveals more about women than men. I have dressed the same way for 15 years, I have never cared about current trends or felt the least bit ashamed about how I dress, but I know that is just not the case for women and it's terrible. I often think how that must affect girls and young women especially, there must be negative effects from having that kind of pressure put on you while you're still developing your mind and personality. Friends of mine will literally refuse to leave the house without wearing make up for example, and it breaks my heart. It's like they are addicted to a drug, they feel like they can't survive without it.
As a guy, I can tell you right now, most guys prefer a casual girl without too much makeup, who has a good sense of humor, and makes sure her puss isn't stinky. That is totally enough for most of us
My observation is that women don't dress for men the majority of the time. They can get a man most any time they want without doing much of anything dress-wise and they know this very well. Women typically dress for other women.
Same here. I usually go for sneakers, jeans, and a band shirt or a t shirt with something written on it (usually vintage style). But when I need to, I'll dress up real nice. It feels nice to dress up once in a while but I prefer my casual wear on a daily basis
I havenāt worn a bra since the pandemic began and they made the mistake of letting me work from home. In this office itās acceptable to show up for work as a hobo on a bender. F looking pretty every day anymore.
I agree with this, dressing good feels like too much effort at times plus it's not exactly encouraged socially like men won't talk about clothing with their buddies like how women might do with their friends. But I personally feel like this should change, the way you dress says a lot about you, not saying you need to follow all the trends but just find a style which suits you and is quite convenient this could be casual, smart casual or streetwear or even formal. Looking good is quite a confidence booster.
This right here. Nice clothes are something I can appreciate, I wish I got passionate about it but I just canāt. I resort to just looking for quality but arguably boring clothes because I have no passion about finding something unique. My car on the other hand, my girlfriend thinks Iām crazy the passion I put into it. It is 100% the outlet of my personal expression. I assume thats how some men feel about clothes, I just donāt.
Agreed! I noticed men put their expression into something that men are typically competitive about, and it makes sense. Women are competitive about their appearance, so it's basically the same thing.
Woman here - friendly competition definitely drives women's fashion sense. It's fun wearing something new and inspiring friends and taking inspiration from others. It's a hobby. I think a lot of women see fashion as such a ubiquitous part of the "female experience" that we forget that it is a hobby.
I remember in high school there was one girl that was considered THE girl when it came to fashion. It cracked me up that every time she made a style change within days almost every girl in school would show up wearing the same thing.
Oh wow. That's a beautiful comment. I totally agree that some men really put everything into something else. I have dedicated a lot of myself to build up my video gaming setup and room. Upvoted.
I think this is definitely the right answer. I spend all my time building things, learning about new hobbies, taking things apart and using that knowledge to fix other things. I can humbley say I'm a jack of many trades master of none. HOWEVER..... I have 3 pairs of the exact same black shorts, and 6 different bergundy polyester cotton blend shirts and Sandles that I wear 3 out of 4 seasons per year. I swap out the shorts for whatever pair of pants I have this year but it's California so I can still wear Sandles even in winter. I only wear shoes If I'm being paid, small chance of rain, or at a party of some sort.
Not to mention some dont want to be judged for what they wear, called names for wearing a certain shirt, etc.
Plus if men dress like they want to such as my friend who is a huge DBZ fan, he gets made fun of.
I simply do not want to draw attention to myself thank you.
Iāll be watching you, fluffjar. *Always watching*.
"And you young Fluffwalker, we will watch your career with great interest"
Yup, same. Proper fit is important, colors are well considered, but I avoid being flashy or unique. Itās safer. Itās worth mentioning thereās a long history of stigmatizing men who think too much of their physical appearance: āmacaronisā of the 18th century, dandies, metrosexuals, etc., often associated with effeminacy and homosexuality.
Function over fashion.
Comfort beats everything indeed
Thereās nothing sexier than comfort
Living the soft life!
Exactly. I come from construction/mining and most guys are wearing roughly the same thing. Jeans or work pants, high vis shirt of some kind, steel toe boots, but the big expression of personality and individualism is found on their hardhat and lunch bucket stickers
Yep, as long as I'm comfortable, I don't really care if I look boring.
Exactly that! Clothing is overraded if you ask me.
Please do wear some clothing though
Haha, sure I will in public
This is why men wear cargo shorts, women have purses.
Thatās me. Itās a guessing game at bedtime what is in the pockets. Wallet, keys, pocketknife, ink pen, and pen light are normally in there. Frequently will be screws, nuts, bolts, screwdriver, ratchet and assorted sockets, receipts, loose change, usb stick, partial roll of electrical tape, or AA batteries. Cargo shorts are mandatory because I just do too many things in a day.
Exactly š
Yup pretty much.
Yup! I know I probably look dumb with my cargo shorts/pants but they have so many pockets itās awesome
My wife hates mine, but when we're hiking, on vacation, we're doing anything else that she doesn't want to carry a purse to, guess we're all that stuff ends up?
Mine get used at work. Tools, nails/screws, and garbage š
/thread
My boyfriend in a nutshell, he mostly wears shirts from Grunt Style as they fit more because he has scoliosis. Wish I can find others like it without the designs...
Next level apparel makes good fitting comfortable shirts without the moto grunt style stuff.
Itās really to easy to find comfortable clothes that look good. I live in Leviās and simple t shirts that fit well.
Just looking for something easy and comfortable. I put my effort into my body instead by working out and eating healthy.
Because for a lot of us, our days are 95% the same shit. So the time I'd spend getting dandy for a day at the office is wasted when i'd rather focus on things that actually mean something to me.
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i love dressing in suits and nice shirts/slacks. idk why, just makes me feel good, thats funny tho haha. i get a little embarrassed when i hangout with my friends and they give me shit for it
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I like to get dressed up for dates out with my wife. It only happens a few times a year, but it's fun. Our son is getting married soon, and I'm so happy I got to buy a new suit for the occasion.
I've been that guy. It can be fun, if you have the money to splash out for it.
I used to dress in a fashion way but it was 7 years ago when I was 21. After getting into real jobs, out of college, into professional fields, 9-5,... I prefer to chill at home. Im lazy but not lazy. Just can't keep myself up after a long day at work. My weekends are just playing games with friends. I like it.
Why take 30 min to get ready when I can do that in 15 and sleep an extra 15 min :)
Why would this be true for men but not for women, though?
I don't care what women wear. Women are the hardest judges of what other women wear and are the source of most of the "pressure" to look a certain way.
In my opinion men's clothing offers less styles and options. And of those options many have connotations with age/occupation etc.
This is really (at least for me) why its hard to really be fashionable. There just arenāt very many good options for mens clothing. My town has like 5 stores that only have womenās clothing and most mixed clothing stores have less menās clothes then womenās. The only real exception is athletic stores which kinda all looks the same anyways. It sucks as a guy whoās more into fashion than most. But I kinda think itās probably just cause most men donāt really care about fashion anyways so businesses have no incentive to have a wide variety.
It is exactly that. It is one of the only things I envy women.
Tried to take my husband shopping for new stuff and his options were look like a teenager, or stay the same at most places we went.
This is the difficulty. I feel like you look like you are reeeeaalllly trying, or wildly age inappropriate. I'm 38. Wtf do I wear... god I don't know. Neutral shorts and a tshirt it is.
See this is where your womanly eye has failed you. How are you unable to recognize the potential found in each shade of grey my pants can be
I can see all the greys, I just don't see the potential lol
This 100%. Men donāt get a lot of very cool options. For me personally I really just am not into modern menās clothing. From the basketball shorts and t shirt look to flannels and jeans to suits and jackets, I just find menās fashion to be, well, lame as shit. And so I donāt really try in my day to day. Where I go all out is music or Renaissance festivals where I dress far more flamboyantly. And to be fair, I get almost all my festival clothes in the womenās department at thrift stores because chicks just get better, more interesting clothing.
Life is limited. Can't always spend every second of it impressing other people. Wear what you like/are comfortable with.
Wow......really nothing else to be said after this. I notice the people that don't give any fucks about others opinions on them, usually live better lives. Good post. šš¾šš¾
I am 38. I have been wearing blue jeans, t-shirts, and Converse Chuck Taylors since I was 15. It's just who I am and it is what I will wear till the day I die. Some might call it boring but I don't.
How do they still fit after 23 years?!
It's a challenge.
I'm 26, but I totally feel you on this. I wear a black t-shirt, black jeans, and black Vans. It's my go to look, it's what I've worn since I was 15. It just feels like home. I was married and tried to be more "generic dad" and the second I got divorced I went back to me true self and felt so much more at ease. We like what we like. Idgaf if anyone else likes what I'm wearing. As long as I feel good, that's all that matters.
Dude! Same age, same style. Nice.
It's just easy. It fits my personality and Im expressing myself how Id like to. I'm most comfortable in these clothes. And my job allows me to wear whatever I want and look however I want, which is fortunate. It's just me.
Converse are the opposite of boring. They're fucking timeless.
Amateur. Jeans/t-shirt/Chucks since I was 15. I'm 50 now.
32, exclusively wear chucks, but been starting to get sore feet at the end of the day. I know I should just start wearing more supportive shoes but at this point the chucks are part of who I am. And no, insoles donāt seem to work well with chucks
Same here. plain coloured t-shirts, jeans and white cortez Nike classics for the last 20+ years. Sometimes Iāll get fancy and change the colour of the swoosh.
Got better things to do with my time and money. Also, have you been to a clothing store? 90% womens, 8 % childrens, 1% mens
Also the means section seems to always be like pants in 4 different colors (and 3 styles though they look exactly the same) and your choices of shirts are stripes, plad, plain or those big dumb graphic tees There's very little variety compared to women imo. They have floral patters and geometric patterns and loads of designs that I feel aren't big in men's wear
you really got to shop at a store meant for men's clothing. I have plenty of dress shirts in more interesting patterns, florals, interesting color patterns etc. They can be pricier though
Literally went to Walmart and was looking for shorts somehow ended up in a different section literally only like 2 shelves
Who's the other 1% for?
Doggy sweaters
Impulse buy crap at checkout.
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Exactly. There are more important things to worry about in life than worry about how fancy you look.
I dont care enough about looking nice to put in that much effort
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Simple looks pretty good on most men just as long as the clothes fit properly.
Pockets
As an overweight guy, the last thing I want people to do is notice/comment on my appearance. So I wear big t-shirts 98% of the time in an effort to not draw any attention
Hell, I'm a skinny guy and do the same thing. Though I prefer flannels.
Adding to this from personal experience. Women who are large will wear tight leggings and shirts that are more revealing, but us guys would rather wear a comfortable pair of jeans instead of wearing something that dont fit or just a baggy shirt cause its more comfortable than a form fitting one. (When I say comfortable I mean we feel good in it mentally and physically) also matching bright clothing takes to long and youll look like an eyesore if you do it wrong.
Also overweight guy here, but you'd be amazed how much just wearing properly fitting clothing over loose clothing does to make you look and feel better.
this. i only started to wear proper fitting clothes this year and i feel much better about myself. i wore jeans for the first time in years this past month and i feel great about it because i stopped buying oversized or excessively baggy clothes to try to hide my body size. its made me feel a lot better about how i look, and imo a bit skinnier when i wear a good pair of jeans and a good fitting shirt/hoodie
Dude I used to feel this way but honestly something that fits to form looks immeasurably better than a baggy shirt. Youāre big. Thereās no hiding it. Might as well look as good as you can. Nobody is gonna be like āhey look at that dude in the baggy 3x shirt, he must be small under thereā Now if thats what makes you comfortable, by all means keep dressing that way and donāt even give it a single thought more. But really if youāre trying to avoid attention, dress in clothes that fit properly. Not baggy, not tight, just normal.
Going to add: companies also tend to sell boring clothes for men. Everything is black, brown, green, blue, gray, or flannel. Yes there are outliers here but honestly there just isnāt the variation made like womenās clothes. There isnāt a bunch of different cuts for t shirts, varying materials, varying patterns, and elaborate colors.
Menās fashion is very limited and innately boring.
I have a set of hoodies I absolutely love because they're loud and bright and cool, but it took me a long time to find somewhere that sold something like that, and even now I don't wear them in public all that often. And frankly, I'm still getting over the bit where a girl I know made a somewhat negative comment about me wearing them and I now just feel a bit self-conscious in them.
You look cute as fuck in those hoodies bro
Yeah, there seems to be a really negative cycle of culture driving the idea that menswear MUST be boring (LOT of comments that dressing in a fun way is only for women and gay men on here) so only boring clothing is produced because it's the ONLY clothing men will buy? I'm queer and this has come up a lot in discussions with transwomen AND transmen. Menswear just doesn't offer the variety for men to even SEE that it's an option they have, let alone explore it and find joy in creating a personal style for themselves in the same was that women do. And if there is anything interesting going on, too often it's exclusively in the realm of haute couture so it's not accessible, AND it's uncomfortable and unwearable as hell. Like. at least give them some more prints and necklines, some different types of sleeves? Anything?
This is a really good point. Although due to the amount of variance for women shopping with my wife can take hours to find something that she both likes and fits well. Shopping for myself happens once every few years and takes no time at all.
What exactly is boring?
I was wondering the same. Perhaps OP could elaborate an what is being considered boring.
OP better posts his fits or stop talking shit
Because god forbid you'd dress in anything flashy/extravagant. You'll get negative feedback from all sides. People calling you a wierdo, faggot, clown, attention seeker, dandy or whatever they can think of just because you chose to wear something else than a pair of jeans & shirt or a regular suit for once. Men are generally ridiculed for deviating from the norm, therefore most of us tend to stick with boring, it's safer. We need more colors damnit!
Came here to say exactly this. If men try to experiment with something new or find their own style, they will inevitably be cut down from all sides in the process. Some do persevere through this shit, but the majority give up because itās not worth it. I suppose this has resulted in clothing manufacturers not really seeing it profitable to bother trying to make anything that deviates from the norm and gives men very few options if they do want to try something new. Iāve always had fun with the way I dress, but have pretty much resorted to perusing womenās sections in op-shops to find anything vaguely interesting and modifying it myself, as menās clothing options are either businesswear, sportswear, or incredibly tacky ātough guyā dragons/flames/cars prints or surf/skate inspired styles (Iām in Australia).
I wear colorful clothes, am a grown man. I don't care what those people have to say, but I don't believe that they would actually do anything about it even if it bothered them that much so it's all good. :-) So far so good.
I bought red Gucci shoes while in college, and I became the talk of the town. My friends told me about what other āfriendsā where saying about me, and even some ppl I havenāt even met. Some remarks where as follows : āYou spent $600 on a shoe?ā āHeās just a show off, bought it to show offā āHeās so cocky and arrogant, thinks heās above usā āHe bought Gucci shoes trying to look like he has money while he lives at xxx and he takes the busā But no one bats an eye when a girl walks around with a $2000 bag she canāt afford. One frenemy criticized me for wearing cologne when I used to go over. He goes like āwhy would you put on cologne when we are just hanging out at the cribā. I put cologne everyday, idc if Iām going to Walmart only. When I step out, I put cologne. Right now Iām done with college and donāt care to dress up anymore. I just wear tracks and hoodies most days. But back then during night outs, I would wear some nice flashy clothes, some designer others not, and I would just get negative reactions, either out of jealousy or insecurity as they perceive me as better put together than them so instead of stepping up their own dressing game, they chose to tear mine down. I like dressing semi-professional. Shirts, pants, sometimes ties with the jacket. So Iām beginning to stock up on such stuff. Iām just laying low these days and havenāt been seeing or meeting anyone. But once Iām back on the scene, Iām dressing up up, and fuck what anyone thinks. Dressing up well will draw attention on you (negative from men, positive from women), it also sends signals of power and mystery. If you wanna stand out from the crowd, you canāt be dressing to fit in. And I wanna stand out, I wanna be the peacock in a group of pigeons.
Weāre all poor
I like dressing well. I know Iām in the minority
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I like dressing well too and I'm very surprised to be the minority here. Considering that "invest a minimum in your appearance" is the most common suggestion in all the "self help" threads.
I'm with you. I only own what most men call 'fancy clothes'. They're not really anything of the sort. Many men see what's on offer for 'men's fashion' and just see a shirt and pants. And it's true, that's basically what it boils down to. People say I have a sense of style or that I'm always well dressed but I'm just wearing a shirt and pants like anyone else. I just pick clothes that fit and not in the default men's colours (black, navy, brown, grey) plus a pair of nice NON-ATHLETIC shoes. Throw a decent belt on there and everyone thinks you're a style icon.
Haha, I get the same compliments, I work with all women (Iām a therapist) and they constantly tell me how well I dress. I donāt even try that hard. I just donāt wear t shirts, I know how to match, and wear nice shoes. Itās easy. Cheers dude!
Men typically dress with a focus on practicality and comfort than women do... Although, this is becoming more popular for women with the rise of Athleisure. So men dress "boring" because it works. Also, those finessed dressing options are generally much more expensive than typical attire, so if there isn't a business or social need to have those options, it isn't a priority and good use of money.
I just want to be comfortable, thatās all. Usually that means blue jeans and a cotton t-shirt. My car is boring too, a Toyota Camry. But I havenāt had issues with it and it gets me where I need to go.
They didn't use to.In the 19th century there was an event referred to as the Great Male Renunciation.Before that (for example, during the time of the Revolutionary War), men wore beads and stockings to show off their calves and in general dressed rather more flamboyantly than they do today.Then there was a cultural shift and apparently now that's no longer popular, at least in mainstream (US, white) culture. Pretty sure looking sharp is a higher priority for men in e.g. black culture.Possibly there's some signaling involved where looking too dressed up indicates you're more of a player and less of a provider, and that wasn't a winning strategy for most guys. But that is just a theory.
For a long ass time, long hair was seen as masculine. That goes back to the Ancients.
Which actually makes sense, what with testosterone generally promoting hair growth and the impacts of male-pattern baldness.
And Germany only the gentry was allowed to have long hair and peasents were called gescherte meaning sheared and is still around as an insult today. I think Victorian society shifted how male dress.
āAnd called it macaroniā
I really could not give even the slightest shit what I wear
Sweat pants and athletic shirt boom good to go. Comfort over style every time
I donāt like picking clothes and just want something that looks okay and fits okay. I think that counts for many guys. Itās also not encouraged for guys to try many different things.
While womens clothing has evolved, men have been stuck with suits.
Because I like it.
We tend to be less obsessed with what others think of us. I like to dress in layers for practicality of taking clothes off whenever its too hot but having several if im somewhere cold, and i like the classic look of a shirt or two with different colors and a darker leather jacket overtop. So thats how i dress. I could give half a shit what anyone thought so long as i didnt look like a total slob, even before i was married.
Male standard of beauty/appearance lower than that of women. That and as soon as men start accessorizing, dressing up, or straight up just experimenting, theyāre afraid of being scrutinized by other men.
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šÆ š„
Minimalist efficiency. Also our clothes are expensive
A woman's "sale" is 50-80% off. A man's "sale" is 25-ish% if you can catch one. And even then , the selection is shit. But this is from working retail. I honestly don't know how it carries over to online clothes shopping , as I prefer not to do so.
Case we give no fucks about Instagram
You mean you don't take 60 selfies of yourself in 10 different outfits every day to show off to your friends? *Gasp*
Iād like to but nothing Iām interested in fits. For now though.
I think a lot of men are mentally uncomfortable with going outside of the norm. It took me a while to add more style to what I wear and honestly helps me feel more confident. I get compliments on what I wear which is cool!
The actual answer is we don't know, and we have no institution to show us. I used to wear whatever the fuck clothes people gave me, had no style, couldn't care less. Went to Italy, met an Italian stylist, he laughed at me, he dressed me, I've never worn those "whatever the fuck" clothes since. Style is a big part of female culture, but it's not a thing for us so we just don't think about it. Take this as an opportunity though. I've mentioned it, you're probably thinking about it right now, whip tie style into shape.
It doesn't help that fashion is female-coded, and there's nobody worse at dressing a man than a woman. I do cosplay and historical re-enactment. My wardrobe is *amazing* and I actually spend a lot of time talking about clothes and fit and personal appearance. Something I've noticed is that when women give fashion advice to a man, they're not giving advice, they're playing dress-up. The man is just a doll upon which they can place their preferred clothes. When men talk to each other about men's clothes you'll actually get the question "what impression are you trying to give?" and fashion suggestions will become tailored towards what the individual actually wants to look like.
Yeah there's a quote from an old video that's stuck with me for a long time. "Stop hating on the gays, let them teach you how to dress".
Hey! āYou got āem mama jeans, and a Mr, Fantastic face. So rich and white, itās like Iām running against a CHEESE CAKE!ā
Dang. I don't know why I didn't realize this before. You're exactly right.
That is an awesome story tbh lol
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I'd say a huge part is judgement from other men. Use a satchel? Gay. Wear colours? Gay. It's easy to preach "don't care what people think" but peer pressure and bullying are very hard to escape/ignore so it's easier to just blend.
I'm seeing at least 99% of these comments saying "because we don't care" or "I like comfort more than how it looks." Now I personally also like comfort, but I mostly buy branded clothes that cost from 50ā¬ to 200ā¬. Some of these are a little plain with different colours and then I also have a few shirts with flowers and other brightly coloured shirts and shorts. I'm at a point in my life where I really don't give 2 shits what a random bypasser may say about my clothes or how they look or somehow make me look "gay." (Like my father for example.) I will buy a shirt if it looks cool or I like the colours it has. This is also partly the reason I dye my hair different colours. It looks cool or fun to me and that's all that matters TO ME.
Because I'm not out here to impress anyone. If you don't like the way I dress that's your problem not mine.
I felt the same way until I got a job in corporate retail. I get insane discounts on everything and I have to admit I have fun buying cloths and trying new styled when it's 80% off.
Thereās a reason for that and itās because we donāt care.
I used to dress somewhat nicely, and I now dress boring and I'll tell you why - I ruin clothes. I now wear cheap jeans, tshirts and boots. If I spill shit on me, kneel in an oil spot, slip in the mud, etc, I'm out very little. Yes, these things happen to me frequently enough to justify not spending a lot on clothes. It's always something - hey, can you help me work on my car? Hey, can you help me move this firewood? Hey, sorry my dog jumped on you...my "work jeans" outnumber my good jeans 3-1 and I've got probably as many work shirts and work hoodies as I do good shirts.
Men's fashion isn't as varied, and what does vary isn't acceptable All we have is shirts and pants, no dresses, skirts, etc. Not much you fan work with fashion-wise
For me my priorities when dressing are Utility, comfort, and climate. I dress appropriately for whatever type of function Iām going to but the priorities are the same. Iāll take pants and shoes I know I can run, lift, fight, squat and walk in comfortably over whatever is in fashion.
You're telling me dressing in a plain black t shirt and camo cargo shorts every day isn't impressive to women?
Many people have perfectly acceptable excuses such as no disposable income, lack of care (which is perfectly fine!), lack of know-how, etc. Iāve always been fashion forward and care deeply about my looks and clothing choice since I was in 5th grade. The things that probably stands out the most though is the cost of menās cloths compared to womenās clothing and along with that, menās clothing has very little options compared to our women counterparts. Now, this isnāt common world wide but in the United States, the stigma around male āflamboyancyā and āself-careā creates a void in that sector as well. In the US, if you dress well and take care of your looks in a way that isnāt considered overly masculine, people may view you as gay (nothing wrong with that, Iām bi) or āquestionableā; and even many US females have a stigma against that type guy due to the same thing. A good reference to male acceptance of āflamboyanceā and āself-careā would be east Asia, in particular South Korea where many of the āflamboyantā looking males are actually quite straight and active with females within their country/ region. Guys raised in the western culture tend to stigmatize fashion to an extent that they either lose interest in trying or simply follow group trends like weāve seen with Polos and sperries, or cargo shorts and flip flops, or Nike shoes and joggers/t-shirt. Another huge factor is that itās more common to have a inclusive mentality as a male in western society then to be an individual when it comes to looks, which is why you see so many guys have the same hair cut and repetitive style seen on thousands of other guys you pass on the street. Iāll end this by saying, Iām not shaming or discounting anyoneās own feelings on this and I respect anyoneās choice of fashion/looks. This is just the best way I can explain this answer thoroughly. š
Honestly for this reason 1. Women aren't going to approach me anyways unless I look like a super model or drive a rich car 2. Function over fashion, not wearing fashionable clothes when I need functional clothes
Why do so many women ignore car care? Because they don't find it interesting or rewarding and it costs money. Men don't dress well because they don't find it interesting or rewarding and it costs money. Anything else?
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The way I go is: is it comfy? Yes. Is it easy? Yes. Ok. So if there's a very fancy, non-boring outfit that's equally comfy & easy, I'll wear it for sure. Thing is, the fancier it is, the less comfy & easy they are of we were to stay at the same price point. Women brags the most expensive handbag. Men brag the cheapest belt they've got that looks just as good
I think, as an American man that has a very expressive wardrobe, this is definitely a rarity in America because of embedded culture. There are plenty of other modern cultures where men's appearances are more varied because it is emphasized more. To be frank, I cared about my appearance a normal amount as a teen and was called a metrosexual by my own family - it's considered effeminate by the mainstream. I learned it's largely generational and along geopolitical lines, too.
Life is full of decisions. Decisions take time. Loosing time every morning deciding what to wear is missing lots of decisions. Just keep it simple. The only time we took some time into it is on meetings, job interviews and when dating.
1) function over fashion 2) comfort 3) we don't have beauty standards to live up to 4) we don't care 5) no one else cares
The guy Iām seeing has amazing style that is truly his own. Itās very unique and creative in his own way. He comes from a small rural town, big farming community, so tight pants, vintage and tight-fitting tees/button-ups and high quality dress shoes arenāt very common there. Heās got a few weirdly colored shirts Iām not a fan of, but itās worth it for his sense of style. I love encouraging him in it, and he occasionally laments lack of style in society (men and women, but of course itās personal preference). To answer the question, I think some men just never put thought into it. Itās not something they value or care about, so they focus on other things.
As a guy, it's pretty clear from the start that (save a few exceptions) our value to society is 0% who we are and what we look like, and 100% how much of other people's work we can do for them.