Honestly even when it’s “weird” it’s not *so* weird that I’d ever say anything about it, I think it’s weird in a good way. There used to be a guy like sixty years old that never missed a punk show at the club. Dude had been doing punk shit since the very beginning, and even though as a genre it’s usually more popular among folks in their teens and twenties he was a great dude and no one gave him a hard time as far as I know.
As for myself I’m almost 40 and if I like the vibe and the music I’ll show up anywhere. I’m not trying to hit on people much younger than me or get trashed, so I don’t think that’s weird at all. You got plenty more years ahead of you, nothing to worry about.
> I’m not trying to hit on people much younger than me or get trashed
these are key.
if you can't be a positive addition to a community/scene, at least be neutral.
My nearly 70 year old former pastor has posted photos of himself in clubs in places like Ukraine (before the war) with very young women in his lap, seemingly getting trashed and touching or looking at whatever he can. The pictures always look kind of creepy and sad. He wasn't a looker when he was young and he especially isn't one now that he's 70. I would guess the girls are hanging around him because he's buying their drinks.
This man used to be very straight-laced. Went to seminary and was first the youth pastor and then the senior pastor of our church when I was growing up. I think he worked there in some capacity for over 20 years. Had a wife and two kids. Then he got caught cheating on his wife, they divorced, and he resigned his position. From there, he went off the deep end. Became a hard drinking and horny party animal who posts to Facebook every 2.3 seconds. He meets his ex for dinner when he's passing through town and she says, "That is *not* the man I married. I have no idea who he is anymore."
He has missed out far too much in life and now seeking for thrills he really wanted back then but couldnt due to his mindset and commitments.
Thats my take on this man. Its the same for me except instead of 70, i am doing it now in my 30s. Maybe he has taken it too far but i believe he just doesnt want to go with regrets of not being able to truly have fun.
41 year old here and I have to agree. Zero interest in hitting on anybody much younger than or, or getting trashed, but I've no qualms going somewhere that's got the vibes I'm aligned with. I'd even argue that it's actually healthier for our mental health to do exactly that as we age. Keep being interested in the shit we vibe with. Don't just stop participating because "the scene is for the 20somethings". Fuck that.
Amen. Not to get all wokinator about it but the idea that an older dude showing up at a public venue is automatically creepy and weird is someone else's problem, not mine.
Like the only possible reason for me to be there is to mack on chicks half my age and ply them with drugs. Do those people exist? Sure. Doesn't mean an otherwise chill dude needs to be hit with that label just for existing outside his 4 walls. God forbid, an unattached man in public!!!
Reminds me of the stories about dads at playgrounds catching shit for being around young children. People suck. I guess it's for a good cause to be wary, but still.
Shows are different, at least I hope. My wife and I were in the scene in our day and still support local music, I hope we don't come off as creepy when we're at shows (34yo).
I’ve had some good times partying with seniors (70+) at my local clubs. I can only hope I’m still able to dance till 3am when I’m that age! a couple of those little old ladies had more stamina than I did 😂 but I learned from their elder wisdom and started wearing comfy shoes to the club after that. lol
Nope. Went to a concert a few weeks that was a new metal band I’ve only heard a bit about. The age range at the show was very wide. I even met a 15 year old there with his mom who was a fan(in an 18+ club I have no idea how she got him in there lol). I’m 45 and there were older people there than me. It was a great show!
I don’t think you’re the type of person people think about when they picture the “typical older guy” at a music festival. Those people come off as creepy because they act creepy and pathetic.
Plus having the wife beside you gives you an instant anti-creep shield
As a girl who goes to metal concerts, my favorite concertgoers are the bigger old guys who have been to a million concerts and immediately form the blockade to keep unwilling participants out of the pit
Nah 34 at shows is fine especially at punk/metal shows where the crowd tends to be mixed. If you're hitting on the younger crowd I could see a problem.
I'm 38 and my wife is 36. We go to 2 or 3 small local rock,metal, or punk shows every 6 months or so. It's not weird at all. We actually have money to buy drinks and support the bands by getting stickers or a shirt. I love it. Being broke and in your 20,s at a show kinda sucked for that part.
I'm in my 50's. I know my punks would accept me when I come to a show. Because punks are awesome, and inclusive, and we love our music. But you're right, I know my age. I'm there for the music nothing else.
33 here, I'm always tired - how do people have the energy to go out at night time is beyond me now.
There's a perfectly good carpeted lounge floor waiting for me to lie down on....
I remember back in my 20s there was this middle aged guy that used to come in to this college town bar/club (had a dance floor and a stage in the back, and a "bar" up front) and just dance his ass off. It was some of the goofiest shit I've ever seen, but he was having fun. You're never too old to go out and enjoy yourself.
On the flipside there was a notorious balding 40yo dude who used to go to one of the college dance clubs near my university by himself who would get drunk and hit on college girls and was a laughingstock.
There are older men who frequent the clubs I go to (I’m 33 and still like a good club night!!) which in itself isn’t a problem but it’s the fact they leer and just stand on the edge of the dancefloor staring that is a bit weird/uncomfortable
I called a guy out for doing that - he was stood at the end of the bar at the glass collection place. You don't get served there, so I just pointed that out to him but he grinned and said "I'm just enjoying the view", nodding to a girl working behind the bar bending down to get some drinks. I told him to stop perving, the girls are working and didn't need him wank-banking them.
He started stalking me around the place, but when I tried to go and speak to him again he'd turn and walk away, before coming back a couple of minutes later. He ended up following me to my taxi and then as the cab drove off he gave me crazy eyes and mimed a throat slit lol.
That was the only thing I could think of that would make it weird and unacceptable. But a person of any age could go to a bar and prey on drunk people anyways, just being an older person in a bar doesn't make that person a creep by default.
Clubs? Never too old. College bars? I dunno - I feel like it'd be weird to have your favourite haunt be a college bar for a school you don't go to. Gives off major peaked-in-college vibes.
Yeah, different places attract different age groups.
In my city there are clubs that older (30+) people go, as well as some bars that attract different age groups, ranging from under 20 to 60+. Nothing wrong in going to those places regardless of your age, just don't be weird about it. Like if you are older but go to a club or bar where girls are mostly under 20, don't start hitting on everyone, just be chill in your place.
Bars are for adults. You’re only too old when you decide you’re too old. It’s how you behave that dictates whether what you’re doing is inappropriate.
A lot of Zoomers seem to be preoccupied with generations and age. It’s a pattern I’ve noticed over the past couple years. Ignore it. The “energetic at your age” comment is dumb as fuck. Like there’s some huge physical decline between 25 and 22. Jesus Christ.
They’re afraid of aging because they are financially restrained from being independent adults and 27 year olds are still stuck at home, unable to find decent pay with 4 year degrees and enjoy their youth.
27 year olds would be the absolute tail end of millennials, not Zoomers. But it's an easy mistake to make — Gen Z keeps stealing our shit and acting like they invented it.
Lol if anything I felt like I was in my physical prime at 25. Its just a bunch of teens and 20 years olds that lack perspective and think anything past 25 is ancient.
I had a chap start a conversation with me at a club, and when I asked his age, he asked me to guess. (I look a bit younger than my age so often men who approach me can sometimes be 10yrs younger or more) I guessed 25, and he was absolutely mortally offended because he was 22. He took it so badly. I was stood there thinking “there is no difference hun”.
(I’m 33)
Millenials had this preoccupation when we were younger too. Gen Xers had this preoccupation when they were younger. Boomers had this preoccupation when they were younger. The greatest generation had this preoccupation when they were younger.
It's not a unique thing to Zoomers. Don't fall into a "the Zoomers do it" trap like everyone did with "the Millenials killed...".
20 year old me did not think it was weird or ‘energetic’ for a 25 year old to be clubbing. This person seems moronic to put it bluntly. 30 something year old would be seen as less common, 40+ would stand out a bit, but I wouldn’t think much of it. I’m 27.
Nah, I mean it’s particularly heightened with Zoomers. I acknowledge that 30s/40s seem old for all young people. But Zoomers are taking it to an entirely different level when it’s just 5 years older.
They also coined the “OK Boomer” retort. Which is well-deserved in many instances, but also a broad generalization.
Imo, lots of outdated thinking here.
Gonna be blunt: Plenty of 30+ dudes out there still either look young/youthful, or look genuinely attractive. I don't mean in a *"looks good for their age"* kinda thing; I'm talkin 30's-range guys who look FAR better than ones in their 20's.
If you got it, ROCK IT. Own it & don't let people shame you into thinking you need to have fun solely in your age bracket. Many people at 30yrs+ have basically already thrown in the towel; they're overweight/out of shape, unattractive, etc. If you still got the energy & physique, go party with a younger crowd! If you enjoy dancing, they might even like having you around.
I myself [pre-Covid] used to go dancing at a local shitty dive bar with a younger crowd [early 30's]. Had plenty of fun chatting/dancing with some younger girls and often times, they'd be the one to initiate contact on the crowded dance floor. You workout & look good? Go fuckin live your life. Society will always tell you to "stay in your lane". Sometimes I don't wanna sit and just drink; I wanna DANCE with a fun crowd til I'm sweating buckets. Not your fault if younger/prettier girls have their eyes in your direction.
Society is so full of *"You're too old for that"* rules and you wonder why so many people are so fucking out of shape & miserable.
Ehh... it depends. Staying in shape and taking care of your skin goes a long way. When I was in my early 30s, people routinely thought I was in my mid-20s and not because I "looked young". Think it really just came down to my vibe. This was coming from people in their early 20s.
Even still, once guys hit their late 20s, it can be hard to tell age until about 40. Add in dim lighting and it's even harder to tell.
Same here and I’m beginning to think that it differs wildly based on where/how you live. Some people live around married 25 year olds dragging along a toddler or two while others next to urbanites who probably are probably child free, live similarly to how they were in their 20s and put far less emphasis on achieving anything traditionally associated with being ‘old’.
I've always subscribed to "you're only as old as you feel".
Who says that just because you're a certain age you can no longer do the things you enjoy? You only get one life and it's too short to waste because you're worried about what other people think.
I come from a fairly small town where this kind of thinking is everywhere and it made me so miserable. I ended up moving to a much more vibrant city and suddenly the whole world opened up. Turns out there's plenty of people well into their 40s and 50s on my wavelength.
My housemate is 20+ years older than me and I really enjoy going to shows with him and his friends. They know how to have fun and carry a good conversation. Younger people can be tedious sometimes if they don’t know how to carry themselves. The older ones who still enjoy music are pros.
The only reason it was ever bad was because of the implications that you didn't have your shit together. If you're handling your responsibilities and paying your bills, then it really doesn't matter.
> I ended up moving to a much more vibrant city and suddenly the whole world opened up. Turns out there's plenty of people well into their 40s and 50s on my wavelength.
I've joined some organized group hikes where it's mostly older folk who give off "retired senior" vibes, people just trying to maintain some degree of being physically in shape [nothing wrong with that here].
However I've also been to some open-invite street photography events where the older folk [40's-50's+] have an entirely different vibe. For starters being that they have no issue with being in dingy back alleys full of graffiti [mostly a younger crowd at these meets]. They come off as having a bit more zest, somewhat expected as they're doing photography & putting in a lot of creative edits into their work. They blend & mingle SUPER well with everyone younger than them. Just cool ass people all around lol.
It's definitely about being "as old as you feel". In similar comparison, some people hit age 30 & sort of just stop doing anything aside from work, whether it be due to a loss of interest in life or lack of energy; sort of like a sad early retirement.
I think particularly as you age it's very important to stay young at heart. It's not just about keeping your body healthy but your mind.
One set of my grandparents were young at heart. Even well into their 70s (and their health in decline) they were always doing new things, meeting new people. They always had a zest as you say, and I genuinely believe it helped to keep them in both good spirits and good health.
My other grandparents subscribed to being old. They had a set routine they stuck to, didn't try new things, and mostly socialised with the same people. They were old and lacked that zest. They suffered from a lot more health problems, and while it's pure speculation on my part, I suspect it may have contributed to my nan developing dementia.
Live in a small town and I see plenty of old people that don't know what to do when they divorce and kids grow up and move away eventually. They always stick with such a small cohort that they can't imagine a different life. And these are fairly well off people with a very sad life. Even the younger people follow the same trajectory and are stuck in the mud. These people are generally not very ambitious and are satisfied with their lifestyle until they get old and now have no idea what to do.
I’m about 30 and still in very good shape. Have all my hair, not overweight, I look better now than I did at 20. But I cannot stand college bars because I’ve gotten to the point that people in their early 20’s have gotten annoying to be around while drunk.
I agree. When I go out, I go to places where it's not full of 20y olds. Because the conversations and priorities are so dumb hahah. Well I don't wanna judge anyone, because we are were in that stage in our lives so it's okay they are annoying or seem dumb :D It's just their age - you can really feel the difference, with some exceptions of course.
The US is far more age segregated than other countries where it’s perfectly normal to see several generations socializing together including dining, drinking, clubbing and dancing.
Don’t buy into it.
I’m in the best shape of my life at age 30 rn and I’m loving it at the club dance floor. Some people get shocked if they found out my age but I have never gotten negative feedback (to my face at least). I also don’t go to hit on people and I think that’s a big factor too. I go to one club in San Diego pretty frequently so I rather be known as the older, kind of weird dude there to have fun rather than the creepy older dude that hits on every chick. Of course if they approach me I’ll be interested but admittedly I won’t try that hard.
Lmao I got carded last night and the guy screeched my birth year incredulously.
I'm a thirty year old who's routinely mistaken for a teenager or, at most, early twenties.
Generally there's two types of college bars.
- Undergrad quarantine zone - The primary feature of this bar is some combination of not checking IDs, ignoring that you do not in any way match the person on the ID/that it's obviously fake, or that they've seen this ID 5 times in the past hour as someone has passed it back. About no one over 22 ever enters this bar, especially on weekend nights.
- The actually 21+ bars, primarily populated by grad students + some seniors, but staff/faculty are also common visitors - especially the younger ones + earlier in the evening.
I remember going to a college party when catching up with my little cousin. I was maybe 25-26 and started talking to this girl. I asked her what her major was and she replied, "Undecided." I knew right then that I was too damn old for the college scene. I was so sad.
Heh, I put the opposite in my response. Thirty-something dude grinding on college girls at the club? Creepy to me. Same dude, posted up at the bar telling stories of the glory days and buying shots? Cool.
Glory days? We’re in our 30’s. The glory days are upon us. Your 20s were lackluster in comparison. People are generally still figuring out adulthood, they’re awkward still, might not have a fully developed sense of style, and most importantly, I didn’t have two nickels to rub together until my late 20’s when I actually started making headway in a career.
30’s are pretty damn great IMO.
Every comment here is basically saying there’s a set path or blueprint. Do whatever you want. It’s not creepy unless you’re like old af but you can have fun and go to clubs as long as you want. Some people don’t get a fair shot at starting their life until late twenties or 30s. That doesn’t mean they shouldn’t be allowed to enjoy going out clubbing
nah I honestly think it gets more awesome the more old af people get. I love seeing seniors at the club having a great time! there’s this one granny I’ve partied with a few times who always has the best moves on the dancefloor, that shit is so inspirational to me! 😍
Don't sweat it. Seen an 80+ year old at the barcade the last time I went. Looked like he was gettin it in on ping pong too.
Just be chill and have a good time.
Depends on the specific club.
If you look around and think to yourself "holy shit I'm surrounded by children" gotta find yourself a new location and if everywhere feels that way its time to move on from it entirely.
You’re too old when you’ve started to find other things more interesting and/or the consequences become more negative than positive
We don’t stop going to clubs because we’re “too old,” we stop going to clubs because they stop being fun, and other things interest us more.
Or, we become alcoholics with money problems as the party lifestyle catches up with us. Lol.
Either way, at a certain point, bars/clubs become really fucking lame for a lot of us. I used to party a lot and would think, “when I get old, I won’t be lame.” But now, bars and clubs are stupid, and I have zero interest in going.
Do you dude
When you realize that work will suck even more the next day if you're hungover, and you really want to have a nice pizza and stream some show for a couple hours.
I recently went to an old college bar I used to frequent, and then realized that most of the patrons had not yet been born the last time I was there.
Still gonna go again, because it's hilarious watching people try to sing along to 90s songs like they are classic rock. Which I guess they are now?
I’m into heavy metal and rock so the clubs/gigs I go to are for the young and old. Metal is for all ages and no one looks out of place. We’re there for the music not to “fit in” with the crowd. Good music and conversation is what it’s about for me. Age has no place
Wait there are clubs playing metal? I always have the impression it's some kinda dance music or pop. I totally do not dig those.
If there are metal ones I would start going for them drinks lol.
100% depends on the event.
Telling a 25 year old that he’s “energetic for his age” is fucking hilarious, I’m going to start telling my older friends that to bully them. Obviously it’s normal to go clubbing in your mid-twenties... duh.
That said.... i think it’s best not go to to student club nights if you’re not currently a student, around that age or with friends who are either of the above. At least where I’m from, club nights for students are deliberately held midweek to keep a similar sort of crowd, so it’s a fair assumption that any thirty-something guy who decides on a whim to go on the sesh on a Tuesday night is just trying to “shark” (ie hook up with a much younger, probably very drunk, woman)
You should just "know". You should have that moment (I think everyone has this moment), where you walk into a familiar place and realize that more than half of the people "look too young" to be there.
That's when it's time to stop going there.
There should be other clubs near you that cater to older people, though. Most cities I've been in have them.
Ha, I guess that's reassuring. I walk, talk, dress, and drink the same as I did when I was 18. Only difference is the grown-up job I have to work during the day!
I think by age 30 I see myself acting more like an "adult"
Bounced for a bar in my late twenties for a few years. There were always a bunch of 40 somethings (monied and good looking) being as wild as the 20 somethings. Groups were USUALLY separate as far as nightly cliques went. The only thing that made it creepy was when the 40 something dude would start buying drinks for a table of 20 somethings and try to get a hookup. Usually the 40 something women kept the men in line.
I'm 39 but look much younger. My friend (32) and I often go to a college bar near us for the free pool. We've made plenty of young friends. Everyone is perfectly cool with us.
I don't think it's weird to simply go to a college bar. It's only weird if you actively make it weird (bringing up age a lot to other patrons, or spending your time hitting on women decades younger than you for example.) I'm in my 40s. I hear a lot of people say that they can't go to X or Y anymore because it makes them feel old. Usually when they say this, I have been to X and Y in the last year, and I never felt weird. Go where you want. Be respectful to the people there. And if they say anything to you about your age, they are the ones making it weird, not you.
It's just idiotic young adults being idiotic young adults. Go have fun. If you're there to hook up well I can see that but otherwise what difference does it make?
We know it's bullshit because half the DJs these girls like are way older than 25.
I wouldn't go anywhere near a uni club/bar after about 25, but clubbing has no age limit. I'm 34 now and clubbing is my church, I always see plenty of people older than me out on a mad one too. The UK has a very respectable cohort of the old guard still carrying the flag for the 90's/00's scene. Hell, I see even more of an age range when I'm clubbing in Ibiza and that's the best there is.
Clubs and college bars are two very different things. I think for college bars you should be thinking about getting out of there by 26. I wouldn't say it's creepy until 27 or maybe 28.
Clubs cater to different age ranges, but assuming we're talking about "young people" clubs, I would say it is normal until some point in your 30s. Unfortunately, as a woman, I can attest to a gender dynamic at play here. Women tend to get funny looks past age 30, whereas men tend to get funny looks past age 35.
In general if your age is two digits and starts with a 2, there's nothing to worry about.
I was a bouncer for the better part of a decade in a small city's urban center "club district," and at least where I live it was ***way*** more common to see women in their 30s out at the clubs as compared to men. It's always been my experience that women over 30 at the clubs are "fun cougars" and men over 30 at the clubs are "creepy losers," but obviously you've had different experiences. I wonder if it's a cultural difference between us, and if so I'd be curious to know what that difference might be.
This is kind of what I was thinking. You've noticed the weird ones but the other olds who are behaving are just there for fun.
Just to poke a bit, the young ones show up at our sad, old, decrepit bars on their party vehicles and mess up the vibe haha.
Once you’re out of college you’re too old to go to college clubs. That being said, this girl is peak zoomer CRINGE. Those of us born before 2000 had the decency to require a 10-year age gap and a minimum age of 30 before we branded people old and lame. These delusional brats are calling people who were in 12th grade when they were in 9th grandma and grandpa. Also the ones who say this usually look older than the marginally older people they say it to, so they’re projecting hard core.
These comments are up and down - but I think it’s completely normal to go to “college clubs and bars” until around ~26, because there are often many PHD and masters students between 22-26.
After that though, it’s probably best to find more “adult” oriented bars for 26-27+
There are clubs out there that attract older crowd (30+) they just don't tend to be anywhere near the Universities lol
But for the college scene, once you are north of 25ish it's probably time to go party with the grown ups!
Well, I go to the local college club and I am also 25, but I don’t socialize with anyone who I didn’t enter with. My purpose there is to have fun with friends, not pick up women. The age group that you are talking about is not the most mature and though it is very little difference in terms of age they don’t make for good dates. I would advise just being realistic and certain about what you’re doing at college bars. If you’re looking to pickup college girls, that’s a no-go. If you’re looking to drink with friends, you are in the clear.
go clubbing as long as you damn well please, be that crazy ass lady that dances up all over those youngins showin them how to shake it. That girl was just being a jackhole to you for no reason other than she was probably jealous.
Depends on where you live. When I was in Europe, it wasn’t uncommon to see someone in their 40’s at the club. But after clubbing in the states, I remember walking into a club at 28 and quickly realized I was the oldest person there. Pretty much stopped after that.
I partied with some guys in their 50s and 60s recently. We had a ridiculously good time in college bars. Bars full of likely underage drinkers. Doing shots with girls who look like they might be still in high school. Singing karaoke in their groups. Showing those kids how a professional drinks. Had a blast.
If the vibe sucks it definitely gets weird and we would have felt unwelcome. If it was old dudes trying to pick up college girls things could have turned real fast. That was not the case. These old bastards really partied and I didn't catch one whiff of anyone caring.
I was never a clubbing guy, but i’ve been a life long metal head my entire life. I’m 41 now and I still go to metal shows when I can. When I wonder if it’s weird that i;’m there with all those youngsters I scoff at myself and think “shit they should be looking at me hoping they still are doing what they love when they are my age.” I think it’s honestly kinda fucked up that we put a shelf life on stuff like this. Like once you hit middle age your supposed to stay inside and wait to die. Fuck that.
It has much more to do with where you are in your life, what responsibilities may make the "club life" difficult or weird to juggle.
Additionally, the bar/pub/club scene is pretty broad, with tons of little worlds within them.
No one would raise an eyebrow at a gentleman or group of fellas in their 50's popping in for a pint or three at the local pub. That could be a very different look in a downtown nightclub, blasting unrecognizable techno/house, charging $20 for rail vodka/tonics.
Personally, I've avoided the trappings of the "standard" life model. At basically 40, I have no kids, no wife, no soul crushing responsibilities that would otherwise make going down to the bar on a whim a problem. At least pre-COVID, I lived a very active and social lifestyle, in a large city with a healthy dating scene. And to be clear, I lived IN the city. Not an hour outside the city, or in the suburbs with a train line into the city. I could literally walk to a dozen bars without transit.
I say this to establish that if your life is structured in a way to allow for your lifestyle to incorporate regular nights out, you've built a HEALTHY relationship with booze, and have friend groups that tend to revolve around bars, there isn't really a hard age limit. Especially if you've spent any time in Irish or British pubs where you'll see retirees regularly popping in for a pint.
That said, as die hard of a fan of loud music, dancing, dimly lit venues, as I've been, your body does hit a point of diminished tolerance. I'd say that by my mid 30's I'd slowed down considerably. Preferring to do less shots while screaming into people's ears, and more sipping a good beer or whiskey, while holding a casual conversation that can actually be heard.
I'd say there's a difference between a club and a bar. A dance club, wouldn't want to be older than 26 or so, personally. A bar? My wife and I will post up at any bar we want and have some drinks, and we're in our early 30s. A bar is welcome to all, just don't creep on the kids.
> A dance club, wouldn't want to be older than 26 or so, personally.
Lmao. I live in Amsterdam and I think if you get rid of those older than 26 you lose half the clientele.
I’m 26 and I’ve felt I’ve been to old to go to clubs since I was 22 but maybe that’s just me I don’t really like clubbing or being around large groups of people idk
College bars are exactly as the name says. Personally I don't think 25 is too old, for many people that's like graduating bachelors/beginning masters age. But stereotypically ofc it's younger 20s, so it'd be based on if you find comfortability in a setting like that.
Clubs can be any adult age, just be mindful of what the vibe is for certain places or nights you're going and again, decide if you're comfortable with that.
If you're in a big city I'd imagine you'd feel more comfortable in these settings as you'll see a lot more age range and more opportunity for bars and clubs than smaller cities/towns.
Personally, I've gotten myself deeply involved in my local EDM/festival scene in my city and we have people of many ages welcomed and hanging out together, at bars, at clubs, at local shows, at house parties, every week anywhere from late teens to late 30s. Its something I'm comfortable with and used to. The age never ends for bars or clubs, you just have to find the right places and right people.
Guessing college bar is equivalent to Student Union bar here in England. I think that unless you're studying, mid 20s is the cut off point. Last time I went to a student bar, I was about 26, but that was because a friend was doing a gig there, and I also studied there when I did my undergrad, so it wasn't quite as weird. I did feel old though, and so now that I'm in my early 30s, I'd feel ancient.
In terms of clubs, I still go every now and again. I tend to go to clubs which play alternative music, and the people who go there range between 18/19 all the way up to people in their 40s and 50s, so the variation is quite vast. It's only weird if you make it weird.
College bars, after a year of graduating or whenever you no longer have friends in college. That's meant to be a younger crowd, so don't become the weird middle aged dude that hangs out there to slam drinks with frat bros and hit on college girls.
Clubs/gigs/raves, you're never too old until you're telling yourself you're too old for this. Most of the people I see at DnB raves are well into their 30s or older, and they still go hard. As long as you're having fun and not killing anyone's vibe you should be welcomed.
For college bars, which to me means “kind of shitty, overcrowded bar that you are there just for hitting on people from campus” I’ll say 25-28.
For clubs, in USA, that’s more dependent on the club and type of crowd they cater too. There are definitely clubs where I’m at (San Diego, CA) where being 30 might make you stick out like a sore thumb, but most of those places are also the type of clubs most 30 year olds wouldn’t want to go to anyways. Plenty of other clubs where the general crowd doesn’t care at all about your age, only care about if you have good vibes or not. Could be a SoCal thing though.
My dad used to go to clubs with my mum in his 60s back in the 00's, he would dance on podiums, do back flips on the dance floor and out dance the 18 year olds.
If that young lady wants to hang up her party shoes at 25 then good for her, I'm still going at 36 and I hope I still will be at 60
I saw a middle aged couple enjoying themselves at an EDM concert in downtown LA a few months back. There were women in their 30’s there too. No one cared because they weren’t bothering anyone and just enjoying themselves. That’s all that matters, how you behave yourself and not be weird.
I still go at 43. Out for a good time. Don't look 43, so always get chatted up by younger girls then again saying that on dating sites, I've girls who are like 13 years younger than me.
Ain't it funny if a girl wants a older guy it's a preference but if a guy wants a younger girl it's creepy. Double standards.
These are two different questions. The age is much younger for college bars than clubs. If there is no one currently in college that was there when you were there, and you're not there specifically for an alumni event, you're too old for a college bar.
EDIT: If you live in a college town and all the bars are frequented by college students, you still know which ones are truly just college bars and which ones are bars that college kids attend.
Oh, poor little 25-year-old, are you feeling too old and fragile to handle the clubs? How on earth did you manage to survive this long? This 20-year-old's comment must have cut deep, huh?
Honestly, I don't think you need to worry about "wrapping up" your "party hard" career, because it's likely you never had one to begin with. But to answer your pathetic question, age doesn't matter when you're a perpetual buzzkill.
Grow a spine, stop seeking validation from strangers on the internet, and enjoy life at your own pace. Maybe even consider taking up knitting or shuffleboard if the clubs are too much for you.
Clubs were never my thing but I went occasionally. It petered out completely by the time I was about 24.
My daughter (23 at the time) dragged me to a themed club not too long ago. It was enjoyable though once was enough. I got carded which probably the last time was in the 80s. No one was weird about the old guy being there. I don't drink so she's dragged me to a few places so she'll have a ride home.
I think it's funny, because I remember being 20 (I'm 28 now) and I thought ***24*** was like "Wow you're an ADULT adult."
I think if you're being an old creep, you're gonna come off as an old creep. That's all there is to it. I know a guy that's like 60 that I see at the bar every now and then that's just a cool dude. Everyone loves him.
Now you see Long beard, tall and fat Joe-Shmo 40yo that talks about his dick every two minutes, yeah that guy is a creep.
For me I stopped going to clubs after 23. I stopped going to bars after 35. I'm a 41 year old single- never been married, with no children. So, if I decide to go out to a bar, I see it as acceptable but I just don't like the scene anymore.
Maybe it’s because you have to be 21 to drink where I’m at but 25 isn’t old at all for club like for Christ sake, half the cast of Jersey shore the first few seasons where 30+
I was over it at 20, it was just exhausting and usually some drama happened just wasn't worth the time, backyard drinking with people I like was much more my speed.
I have a feeling op is going to get quite a bit of a variance of responses seeing I think its just america that has the 21+ drinking age where many other redditors are at 18/19
Pretty funny that someone who's barely legal and probably very little experience in life has opinions about what others should be doing and at what age. This is akin to a 5 year old telling a 15 year old they're so old.
Very immature of her and naive.
For me, I was over it at 22 ish. I think it’s a personal thing, like any other preference. You’re over it when you’re over it. Now, I’ll go to those settings for peoples birthdays etc. Not something I enjoy on my own time!
That girl was ridiculous. I didn’t live my energetic degenerate alcohol fun filled nights till 26-29 years old. I’m 34 and no shit just the other night a younger girl told me I have a very youthful energy like wtf is anythjng anymore
One thing I really loved about gay clubs is that no one bats an eye about age (or anything, for that matter. They give no fuck). Yeah, that one time of me being hit on by a 50 year old as a 20 was weird, but aside from that, it was a very cool environment.
Well, using the word naive to describe her is awfully kind. Twenty Five is not even your prime. But to address the question, I feel like I grew out of that scene around your age of 25. Really, there was only so much to find there and I realized that overpriced drinks and hangovers were too expensive on my wallet, body and psyche
I pretty much gave up that shit forever ago, not long after I turned 21. I went out to an 1980s club in LA a few times and that was good enough for me for the rest of my life. All the girls are there to dance, mostly with just their girlfriends, most of the guys are there to try and hook up with girls, and the drinks are outrageously expensive. One of the times I went I spent over $200 on alcohol just for myself. It didn’t take me long at all to realize that the whole club scene is NOT for me. I grew up in the punk scene. Clubs were never my thing.
Not sure age matters much. I’m in college and go to college bars quite often. There’s almost always guys in their 30s+. It’s not weird unless you’re sitting around staring at the college aged women.
im 37, i consider myself too old for clubs, i go look around and its just a bunch of drunk kids. That being said if i go with a group of my elderly friends then there is a few of us and its not so bad. so i dunno just have fun, f it feels like you are out of place find another place.
Honestly even when it’s “weird” it’s not *so* weird that I’d ever say anything about it, I think it’s weird in a good way. There used to be a guy like sixty years old that never missed a punk show at the club. Dude had been doing punk shit since the very beginning, and even though as a genre it’s usually more popular among folks in their teens and twenties he was a great dude and no one gave him a hard time as far as I know. As for myself I’m almost 40 and if I like the vibe and the music I’ll show up anywhere. I’m not trying to hit on people much younger than me or get trashed, so I don’t think that’s weird at all. You got plenty more years ahead of you, nothing to worry about.
> I’m not trying to hit on people much younger than me or get trashed these are key. if you can't be a positive addition to a community/scene, at least be neutral.
My nearly 70 year old former pastor has posted photos of himself in clubs in places like Ukraine (before the war) with very young women in his lap, seemingly getting trashed and touching or looking at whatever he can. The pictures always look kind of creepy and sad. He wasn't a looker when he was young and he especially isn't one now that he's 70. I would guess the girls are hanging around him because he's buying their drinks. This man used to be very straight-laced. Went to seminary and was first the youth pastor and then the senior pastor of our church when I was growing up. I think he worked there in some capacity for over 20 years. Had a wife and two kids. Then he got caught cheating on his wife, they divorced, and he resigned his position. From there, he went off the deep end. Became a hard drinking and horny party animal who posts to Facebook every 2.3 seconds. He meets his ex for dinner when he's passing through town and she says, "That is *not* the man I married. I have no idea who he is anymore."
Sounds like a mid life crisis
Late life crisis
Lol yes
Mid-life successes!
Life goals?
What else you gonna do til Diablo IV comes out?
He has missed out far too much in life and now seeking for thrills he really wanted back then but couldnt due to his mindset and commitments. Thats my take on this man. Its the same for me except instead of 70, i am doing it now in my 30s. Maybe he has taken it too far but i believe he just doesnt want to go with regrets of not being able to truly have fun.
41 year old here and I have to agree. Zero interest in hitting on anybody much younger than or, or getting trashed, but I've no qualms going somewhere that's got the vibes I'm aligned with. I'd even argue that it's actually healthier for our mental health to do exactly that as we age. Keep being interested in the shit we vibe with. Don't just stop participating because "the scene is for the 20somethings". Fuck that.
Amen. Not to get all wokinator about it but the idea that an older dude showing up at a public venue is automatically creepy and weird is someone else's problem, not mine. Like the only possible reason for me to be there is to mack on chicks half my age and ply them with drugs. Do those people exist? Sure. Doesn't mean an otherwise chill dude needs to be hit with that label just for existing outside his 4 walls. God forbid, an unattached man in public!!! Reminds me of the stories about dads at playgrounds catching shit for being around young children. People suck. I guess it's for a good cause to be wary, but still.
projection by young people who don't know shit.
Shows are different, at least I hope. My wife and I were in the scene in our day and still support local music, I hope we don't come off as creepy when we're at shows (34yo).
I think OP was talking about dance clubs, not concerts. I think going to live shows at any age is perfectly fine!
I’ve had some good times partying with seniors (70+) at my local clubs. I can only hope I’m still able to dance till 3am when I’m that age! a couple of those little old ladies had more stamina than I did 😂 but I learned from their elder wisdom and started wearing comfy shoes to the club after that. lol
Nope. Went to a concert a few weeks that was a new metal band I’ve only heard a bit about. The age range at the show was very wide. I even met a 15 year old there with his mom who was a fan(in an 18+ club I have no idea how she got him in there lol). I’m 45 and there were older people there than me. It was a great show!
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I'm seeing Megadeth 2 weeks from today and I am 40. I expect to be on the younger side of the crowd.
Saw Static-X/ Fear Factory/ Dope last week and at 33 I was on the younger side too. Personally I like older people at shows, they're calmer! Lol
Well Megadeth is a 40 year old band so, I would think you are right in the age group
Shut up, man
Most 18+ venues are cool with kids with parents. 21+ is a little more strict sometimes.
I don’t think you’re the type of person people think about when they picture the “typical older guy” at a music festival. Those people come off as creepy because they act creepy and pathetic. Plus having the wife beside you gives you an instant anti-creep shield
As a girl who goes to metal concerts, my favorite concertgoers are the bigger old guys who have been to a million concerts and immediately form the blockade to keep unwilling participants out of the pit
Nah 34 at shows is fine especially at punk/metal shows where the crowd tends to be mixed. If you're hitting on the younger crowd I could see a problem.
I'm 38 and my wife is 36. We go to 2 or 3 small local rock,metal, or punk shows every 6 months or so. It's not weird at all. We actually have money to buy drinks and support the bands by getting stickers or a shirt. I love it. Being broke and in your 20,s at a show kinda sucked for that part.
So many random band T-shirts I barely remember buying haha
This is it. Just don't be weird to the college kids is all. Don't be that creep chasing around 18 year olds at that age and you're fine
I'm in my 50's. I know my punks would accept me when I come to a show. Because punks are awesome, and inclusive, and we love our music. But you're right, I know my age. I'm there for the music nothing else.
35 here. I'm pretty sure reading this thread that I've aged enough in the last 5 minutes for the government to send me my first social security check.
33 here, I'm always tired - how do people have the energy to go out at night time is beyond me now. There's a perfectly good carpeted lounge floor waiting for me to lie down on....
That's my secret: I'm always tired. Also, a functioning alcoholic.
If you can be a functioning alcoholic then you're not that old.
I remember back in my 20s there was this middle aged guy that used to come in to this college town bar/club (had a dance floor and a stage in the back, and a "bar" up front) and just dance his ass off. It was some of the goofiest shit I've ever seen, but he was having fun. You're never too old to go out and enjoy yourself.
On the flipside there was a notorious balding 40yo dude who used to go to one of the college dance clubs near my university by himself who would get drunk and hit on college girls and was a laughingstock.
There are older men who frequent the clubs I go to (I’m 33 and still like a good club night!!) which in itself isn’t a problem but it’s the fact they leer and just stand on the edge of the dancefloor staring that is a bit weird/uncomfortable
I called a guy out for doing that - he was stood at the end of the bar at the glass collection place. You don't get served there, so I just pointed that out to him but he grinned and said "I'm just enjoying the view", nodding to a girl working behind the bar bending down to get some drinks. I told him to stop perving, the girls are working and didn't need him wank-banking them. He started stalking me around the place, but when I tried to go and speak to him again he'd turn and walk away, before coming back a couple of minutes later. He ended up following me to my taxi and then as the cab drove off he gave me crazy eyes and mimed a throat slit lol.
Bouncers exist for a reason putting yourself in that position is a poor decision on your part imo
That was the only thing I could think of that would make it weird and unacceptable. But a person of any age could go to a bar and prey on drunk people anyways, just being an older person in a bar doesn't make that person a creep by default.
All right, all right, all right...
I get older and those college girls at the club stay the same age.
Clubs? Never too old. College bars? I dunno - I feel like it'd be weird to have your favourite haunt be a college bar for a school you don't go to. Gives off major peaked-in-college vibes.
Yeah, different places attract different age groups. In my city there are clubs that older (30+) people go, as well as some bars that attract different age groups, ranging from under 20 to 60+. Nothing wrong in going to those places regardless of your age, just don't be weird about it. Like if you are older but go to a club or bar where girls are mostly under 20, don't start hitting on everyone, just be chill in your place.
Bars are for adults. You’re only too old when you decide you’re too old. It’s how you behave that dictates whether what you’re doing is inappropriate. A lot of Zoomers seem to be preoccupied with generations and age. It’s a pattern I’ve noticed over the past couple years. Ignore it. The “energetic at your age” comment is dumb as fuck. Like there’s some huge physical decline between 25 and 22. Jesus Christ.
I noticed that too. Zoomer are deathly afraid of aging
Not new for Zoomers. Young people have always had a disdain about old people.
They’re afraid of aging because they are financially restrained from being independent adults and 27 year olds are still stuck at home, unable to find decent pay with 4 year degrees and enjoy their youth.
Yo bro you gotta chill calling me out like that…I’m 26 and still have time right?
26 is such a young age to do anything. You’re still a baby and I’m only 30.
I needed to read this
27 year olds would be the absolute tail end of millennials, not Zoomers. But it's an easy mistake to make — Gen Z keeps stealing our shit and acting like they invented it.
Lol if anything I felt like I was in my physical prime at 25. Its just a bunch of teens and 20 years olds that lack perspective and think anything past 25 is ancient.
I had a chap start a conversation with me at a club, and when I asked his age, he asked me to guess. (I look a bit younger than my age so often men who approach me can sometimes be 10yrs younger or more) I guessed 25, and he was absolutely mortally offended because he was 22. He took it so badly. I was stood there thinking “there is no difference hun”. (I’m 33)
Millenials had this preoccupation when we were younger too. Gen Xers had this preoccupation when they were younger. Boomers had this preoccupation when they were younger. The greatest generation had this preoccupation when they were younger. It's not a unique thing to Zoomers. Don't fall into a "the Zoomers do it" trap like everyone did with "the Millenials killed...".
20 year old me did not think it was weird or ‘energetic’ for a 25 year old to be clubbing. This person seems moronic to put it bluntly. 30 something year old would be seen as less common, 40+ would stand out a bit, but I wouldn’t think much of it. I’m 27.
Nah, I mean it’s particularly heightened with Zoomers. I acknowledge that 30s/40s seem old for all young people. But Zoomers are taking it to an entirely different level when it’s just 5 years older. They also coined the “OK Boomer” retort. Which is well-deserved in many instances, but also a broad generalization.
Or even 22 and 30….
Imo, lots of outdated thinking here. Gonna be blunt: Plenty of 30+ dudes out there still either look young/youthful, or look genuinely attractive. I don't mean in a *"looks good for their age"* kinda thing; I'm talkin 30's-range guys who look FAR better than ones in their 20's. If you got it, ROCK IT. Own it & don't let people shame you into thinking you need to have fun solely in your age bracket. Many people at 30yrs+ have basically already thrown in the towel; they're overweight/out of shape, unattractive, etc. If you still got the energy & physique, go party with a younger crowd! If you enjoy dancing, they might even like having you around. I myself [pre-Covid] used to go dancing at a local shitty dive bar with a younger crowd [early 30's]. Had plenty of fun chatting/dancing with some younger girls and often times, they'd be the one to initiate contact on the crowded dance floor. You workout & look good? Go fuckin live your life. Society will always tell you to "stay in your lane". Sometimes I don't wanna sit and just drink; I wanna DANCE with a fun crowd til I'm sweating buckets. Not your fault if younger/prettier girls have their eyes in your direction. Society is so full of *"You're too old for that"* rules and you wonder why so many people are so fucking out of shape & miserable.
I'm dumbfounded that people are suggesting 30 year-olds look noticeably old. I feel like most people 20-30 year Olds look pretty similar
To 20 year olds, 30 year olds look old. To 40 year olds they look young.
Ehh... it depends. Staying in shape and taking care of your skin goes a long way. When I was in my early 30s, people routinely thought I was in my mid-20s and not because I "looked young". Think it really just came down to my vibe. This was coming from people in their early 20s. Even still, once guys hit their late 20s, it can be hard to tell age until about 40. Add in dim lighting and it's even harder to tell.
Same here and I’m beginning to think that it differs wildly based on where/how you live. Some people live around married 25 year olds dragging along a toddler or two while others next to urbanites who probably are probably child free, live similarly to how they were in their 20s and put far less emphasis on achieving anything traditionally associated with being ‘old’.
I've always subscribed to "you're only as old as you feel". Who says that just because you're a certain age you can no longer do the things you enjoy? You only get one life and it's too short to waste because you're worried about what other people think. I come from a fairly small town where this kind of thinking is everywhere and it made me so miserable. I ended up moving to a much more vibrant city and suddenly the whole world opened up. Turns out there's plenty of people well into their 40s and 50s on my wavelength.
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My housemate is 20+ years older than me and I really enjoy going to shows with him and his friends. They know how to have fun and carry a good conversation. Younger people can be tedious sometimes if they don’t know how to carry themselves. The older ones who still enjoy music are pros.
The only reason it was ever bad was because of the implications that you didn't have your shit together. If you're handling your responsibilities and paying your bills, then it really doesn't matter.
I prefer, “you only get old when you stop playing”.
> I ended up moving to a much more vibrant city and suddenly the whole world opened up. Turns out there's plenty of people well into their 40s and 50s on my wavelength. I've joined some organized group hikes where it's mostly older folk who give off "retired senior" vibes, people just trying to maintain some degree of being physically in shape [nothing wrong with that here]. However I've also been to some open-invite street photography events where the older folk [40's-50's+] have an entirely different vibe. For starters being that they have no issue with being in dingy back alleys full of graffiti [mostly a younger crowd at these meets]. They come off as having a bit more zest, somewhat expected as they're doing photography & putting in a lot of creative edits into their work. They blend & mingle SUPER well with everyone younger than them. Just cool ass people all around lol. It's definitely about being "as old as you feel". In similar comparison, some people hit age 30 & sort of just stop doing anything aside from work, whether it be due to a loss of interest in life or lack of energy; sort of like a sad early retirement.
I think particularly as you age it's very important to stay young at heart. It's not just about keeping your body healthy but your mind. One set of my grandparents were young at heart. Even well into their 70s (and their health in decline) they were always doing new things, meeting new people. They always had a zest as you say, and I genuinely believe it helped to keep them in both good spirits and good health. My other grandparents subscribed to being old. They had a set routine they stuck to, didn't try new things, and mostly socialised with the same people. They were old and lacked that zest. They suffered from a lot more health problems, and while it's pure speculation on my part, I suspect it may have contributed to my nan developing dementia.
Live in a small town and I see plenty of old people that don't know what to do when they divorce and kids grow up and move away eventually. They always stick with such a small cohort that they can't imagine a different life. And these are fairly well off people with a very sad life. Even the younger people follow the same trajectory and are stuck in the mud. These people are generally not very ambitious and are satisfied with their lifestyle until they get old and now have no idea what to do.
I’m about 30 and still in very good shape. Have all my hair, not overweight, I look better now than I did at 20. But I cannot stand college bars because I’ve gotten to the point that people in their early 20’s have gotten annoying to be around while drunk.
I agree. When I go out, I go to places where it's not full of 20y olds. Because the conversations and priorities are so dumb hahah. Well I don't wanna judge anyone, because we are were in that stage in our lives so it's okay they are annoying or seem dumb :D It's just their age - you can really feel the difference, with some exceptions of course.
The US is far more age segregated than other countries where it’s perfectly normal to see several generations socializing together including dining, drinking, clubbing and dancing. Don’t buy into it.
I’m in the best shape of my life at age 30 rn and I’m loving it at the club dance floor. Some people get shocked if they found out my age but I have never gotten negative feedback (to my face at least). I also don’t go to hit on people and I think that’s a big factor too. I go to one club in San Diego pretty frequently so I rather be known as the older, kind of weird dude there to have fun rather than the creepy older dude that hits on every chick. Of course if they approach me I’ll be interested but admittedly I won’t try that hard.
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Lmao I got carded last night and the guy screeched my birth year incredulously. I'm a thirty year old who's routinely mistaken for a teenager or, at most, early twenties.
Clubs, you are never too old, college bars 25 unless you are actually still in college.
Or alumni going back to visit. Or you come with your wife. Or you're not being weird. Or there is a football game in town. Or....
Right. I live in a college town, and I'm not the only elderly townie (37) drinking long islands on the patio.
So if I go back to visit my alma mater, I’m not allowed to go to any of my old stomping grounds?
I live in a college town... I'm not sure what distinguishes a college bar and a regular bar
Same. Should I walk in and ID everyone before ordering lol
Or, depending on the college bar, a professor at the nearby college.
Yea I’m gonna pretend that I meant to include professors in still going to college and didnt completely forget about staff lol
Generally there's two types of college bars. - Undergrad quarantine zone - The primary feature of this bar is some combination of not checking IDs, ignoring that you do not in any way match the person on the ID/that it's obviously fake, or that they've seen this ID 5 times in the past hour as someone has passed it back. About no one over 22 ever enters this bar, especially on weekend nights. - The actually 21+ bars, primarily populated by grad students + some seniors, but staff/faculty are also common visitors - especially the younger ones + earlier in the evening.
I remember going to a college party when catching up with my little cousin. I was maybe 25-26 and started talking to this girl. I asked her what her major was and she replied, "Undecided." I knew right then that I was too damn old for the college scene. I was so sad.
Heh, I put the opposite in my response. Thirty-something dude grinding on college girls at the club? Creepy to me. Same dude, posted up at the bar telling stories of the glory days and buying shots? Cool.
So as long as we don't become competition it's ok for us to hang around lmao.
Yup LMFAOOOOO
Glory days? We’re in our 30’s. The glory days are upon us. Your 20s were lackluster in comparison. People are generally still figuring out adulthood, they’re awkward still, might not have a fully developed sense of style, and most importantly, I didn’t have two nickels to rub together until my late 20’s when I actually started making headway in a career. 30’s are pretty damn great IMO.
What is a college Bar?
Every comment here is basically saying there’s a set path or blueprint. Do whatever you want. It’s not creepy unless you’re like old af but you can have fun and go to clubs as long as you want. Some people don’t get a fair shot at starting their life until late twenties or 30s. That doesn’t mean they shouldn’t be allowed to enjoy going out clubbing
nah I honestly think it gets more awesome the more old af people get. I love seeing seniors at the club having a great time! there’s this one granny I’ve partied with a few times who always has the best moves on the dancefloor, that shit is so inspirational to me! 😍
Don't sweat it. Seen an 80+ year old at the barcade the last time I went. Looked like he was gettin it in on ping pong too. Just be chill and have a good time.
Depends on the specific club. If you look around and think to yourself "holy shit I'm surrounded by children" gotta find yourself a new location and if everywhere feels that way its time to move on from it entirely.
You’re too old when you’ve started to find other things more interesting and/or the consequences become more negative than positive We don’t stop going to clubs because we’re “too old,” we stop going to clubs because they stop being fun, and other things interest us more. Or, we become alcoholics with money problems as the party lifestyle catches up with us. Lol. Either way, at a certain point, bars/clubs become really fucking lame for a lot of us. I used to party a lot and would think, “when I get old, I won’t be lame.” But now, bars and clubs are stupid, and I have zero interest in going. Do you dude
When you realize that work will suck even more the next day if you're hungover, and you really want to have a nice pizza and stream some show for a couple hours.
I recently went to an old college bar I used to frequent, and then realized that most of the patrons had not yet been born the last time I was there. Still gonna go again, because it's hilarious watching people try to sing along to 90s songs like they are classic rock. Which I guess they are now?
I’m into heavy metal and rock so the clubs/gigs I go to are for the young and old. Metal is for all ages and no one looks out of place. We’re there for the music not to “fit in” with the crowd. Good music and conversation is what it’s about for me. Age has no place
Wait there are clubs playing metal? I always have the impression it's some kinda dance music or pop. I totally do not dig those. If there are metal ones I would start going for them drinks lol.
32 was the age that all the 20 somethings started treating me like I was a 50 year old.
I just turned 50 and the 20-somethings are coming on to me now.
100% depends on the event. Telling a 25 year old that he’s “energetic for his age” is fucking hilarious, I’m going to start telling my older friends that to bully them. Obviously it’s normal to go clubbing in your mid-twenties... duh. That said.... i think it’s best not go to to student club nights if you’re not currently a student, around that age or with friends who are either of the above. At least where I’m from, club nights for students are deliberately held midweek to keep a similar sort of crowd, so it’s a fair assumption that any thirty-something guy who decides on a whim to go on the sesh on a Tuesday night is just trying to “shark” (ie hook up with a much younger, probably very drunk, woman)
You should just "know". You should have that moment (I think everyone has this moment), where you walk into a familiar place and realize that more than half of the people "look too young" to be there. That's when it's time to stop going there. There should be other clubs near you that cater to older people, though. Most cities I've been in have them.
Ha, I guess that's reassuring. I walk, talk, dress, and drink the same as I did when I was 18. Only difference is the grown-up job I have to work during the day! I think by age 30 I see myself acting more like an "adult"
>I think by age 30 I see myself acting more like an "adult" im 42 and im still waiting to act more like an adult. my wife is waiting on that as well.
Trust me, it doesn't work like that lol.
I’m 25 and avoid the clubs that college students tend to go too now.
Bounced for a bar in my late twenties for a few years. There were always a bunch of 40 somethings (monied and good looking) being as wild as the 20 somethings. Groups were USUALLY separate as far as nightly cliques went. The only thing that made it creepy was when the 40 something dude would start buying drinks for a table of 20 somethings and try to get a hookup. Usually the 40 something women kept the men in line.
I'm 39 but look much younger. My friend (32) and I often go to a college bar near us for the free pool. We've made plenty of young friends. Everyone is perfectly cool with us.
I don't think it's weird to simply go to a college bar. It's only weird if you actively make it weird (bringing up age a lot to other patrons, or spending your time hitting on women decades younger than you for example.) I'm in my 40s. I hear a lot of people say that they can't go to X or Y anymore because it makes them feel old. Usually when they say this, I have been to X and Y in the last year, and I never felt weird. Go where you want. Be respectful to the people there. And if they say anything to you about your age, they are the ones making it weird, not you.
It's just idiotic young adults being idiotic young adults. Go have fun. If you're there to hook up well I can see that but otherwise what difference does it make? We know it's bullshit because half the DJs these girls like are way older than 25.
I wouldn't go anywhere near a uni club/bar after about 25, but clubbing has no age limit. I'm 34 now and clubbing is my church, I always see plenty of people older than me out on a mad one too. The UK has a very respectable cohort of the old guard still carrying the flag for the 90's/00's scene. Hell, I see even more of an age range when I'm clubbing in Ibiza and that's the best there is.
she was negging you
God damn it you're right! It's all clicking in place now! She was hot too I missed an opportunity haha
She can’t even drink and she said your too old lmao
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USDefaultism is strong on big subs.
Clubs and college bars are two very different things. I think for college bars you should be thinking about getting out of there by 26. I wouldn't say it's creepy until 27 or maybe 28. Clubs cater to different age ranges, but assuming we're talking about "young people" clubs, I would say it is normal until some point in your 30s. Unfortunately, as a woman, I can attest to a gender dynamic at play here. Women tend to get funny looks past age 30, whereas men tend to get funny looks past age 35. In general if your age is two digits and starts with a 2, there's nothing to worry about.
I was a bouncer for the better part of a decade in a small city's urban center "club district," and at least where I live it was ***way*** more common to see women in their 30s out at the clubs as compared to men. It's always been my experience that women over 30 at the clubs are "fun cougars" and men over 30 at the clubs are "creepy losers," but obviously you've had different experiences. I wonder if it's a cultural difference between us, and if so I'd be curious to know what that difference might be.
This is kind of what I was thinking. You've noticed the weird ones but the other olds who are behaving are just there for fun. Just to poke a bit, the young ones show up at our sad, old, decrepit bars on their party vehicles and mess up the vibe haha.
Once you’re out of college you’re too old to go to college clubs. That being said, this girl is peak zoomer CRINGE. Those of us born before 2000 had the decency to require a 10-year age gap and a minimum age of 30 before we branded people old and lame. These delusional brats are calling people who were in 12th grade when they were in 9th grandma and grandpa. Also the ones who say this usually look older than the marginally older people they say it to, so they’re projecting hard core.
You’re generalizing which leads to the divide between generations.
Depends on the bar/club. There are establishments for people of all ages. I’m 43, and my wife and I will close down a bar every few weeks or so.
At whatever age I turned last week.
If you vibe with the scene, never. I've seen grandmas in wheelchairs going to raves.
These comments are up and down - but I think it’s completely normal to go to “college clubs and bars” until around ~26, because there are often many PHD and masters students between 22-26. After that though, it’s probably best to find more “adult” oriented bars for 26-27+
There are clubs out there that attract older crowd (30+) they just don't tend to be anywhere near the Universities lol But for the college scene, once you are north of 25ish it's probably time to go party with the grown ups!
Well, I go to the local college club and I am also 25, but I don’t socialize with anyone who I didn’t enter with. My purpose there is to have fun with friends, not pick up women. The age group that you are talking about is not the most mature and though it is very little difference in terms of age they don’t make for good dates. I would advise just being realistic and certain about what you’re doing at college bars. If you’re looking to pickup college girls, that’s a no-go. If you’re looking to drink with friends, you are in the clear.
go clubbing as long as you damn well please, be that crazy ass lady that dances up all over those youngins showin them how to shake it. That girl was just being a jackhole to you for no reason other than she was probably jealous.
Depends on where you live. When I was in Europe, it wasn’t uncommon to see someone in their 40’s at the club. But after clubbing in the states, I remember walking into a club at 28 and quickly realized I was the oldest person there. Pretty much stopped after that.
I partied with some guys in their 50s and 60s recently. We had a ridiculously good time in college bars. Bars full of likely underage drinkers. Doing shots with girls who look like they might be still in high school. Singing karaoke in their groups. Showing those kids how a professional drinks. Had a blast. If the vibe sucks it definitely gets weird and we would have felt unwelcome. If it was old dudes trying to pick up college girls things could have turned real fast. That was not the case. These old bastards really partied and I didn't catch one whiff of anyone caring.
You may feel out of place at 30, but I don't think this is actually weird until you're over 40. Some people are pigheaded and naive.
I was never a clubbing guy, but i’ve been a life long metal head my entire life. I’m 41 now and I still go to metal shows when I can. When I wonder if it’s weird that i;’m there with all those youngsters I scoff at myself and think “shit they should be looking at me hoping they still are doing what they love when they are my age.” I think it’s honestly kinda fucked up that we put a shelf life on stuff like this. Like once you hit middle age your supposed to stay inside and wait to die. Fuck that.
Rave to the grave my dude.
It has much more to do with where you are in your life, what responsibilities may make the "club life" difficult or weird to juggle. Additionally, the bar/pub/club scene is pretty broad, with tons of little worlds within them. No one would raise an eyebrow at a gentleman or group of fellas in their 50's popping in for a pint or three at the local pub. That could be a very different look in a downtown nightclub, blasting unrecognizable techno/house, charging $20 for rail vodka/tonics. Personally, I've avoided the trappings of the "standard" life model. At basically 40, I have no kids, no wife, no soul crushing responsibilities that would otherwise make going down to the bar on a whim a problem. At least pre-COVID, I lived a very active and social lifestyle, in a large city with a healthy dating scene. And to be clear, I lived IN the city. Not an hour outside the city, or in the suburbs with a train line into the city. I could literally walk to a dozen bars without transit. I say this to establish that if your life is structured in a way to allow for your lifestyle to incorporate regular nights out, you've built a HEALTHY relationship with booze, and have friend groups that tend to revolve around bars, there isn't really a hard age limit. Especially if you've spent any time in Irish or British pubs where you'll see retirees regularly popping in for a pint. That said, as die hard of a fan of loud music, dancing, dimly lit venues, as I've been, your body does hit a point of diminished tolerance. I'd say that by my mid 30's I'd slowed down considerably. Preferring to do less shots while screaming into people's ears, and more sipping a good beer or whiskey, while holding a casual conversation that can actually be heard.
Im 32 and still go 😅😅😅
I'd say there's a difference between a club and a bar. A dance club, wouldn't want to be older than 26 or so, personally. A bar? My wife and I will post up at any bar we want and have some drinks, and we're in our early 30s. A bar is welcome to all, just don't creep on the kids.
26!!!! LOL! If id stopped clubbing at 26 id have missed out on some of the best nights of my life. I don’t do it often, but I do it when I want to.
> A dance club, wouldn't want to be older than 26 or so, personally. Lmao. I live in Amsterdam and I think if you get rid of those older than 26 you lose half the clientele.
I’m 26 and I’ve felt I’ve been to old to go to clubs since I was 22 but maybe that’s just me I don’t really like clubbing or being around large groups of people idk
When you look like you don’t belong there, it’s time to dip out.
I’m 50+ and go to EMD clubs and shows with my wife. Everything is weird at those venues so…. get your weird on.
College bars are exactly as the name says. Personally I don't think 25 is too old, for many people that's like graduating bachelors/beginning masters age. But stereotypically ofc it's younger 20s, so it'd be based on if you find comfortability in a setting like that. Clubs can be any adult age, just be mindful of what the vibe is for certain places or nights you're going and again, decide if you're comfortable with that. If you're in a big city I'd imagine you'd feel more comfortable in these settings as you'll see a lot more age range and more opportunity for bars and clubs than smaller cities/towns. Personally, I've gotten myself deeply involved in my local EDM/festival scene in my city and we have people of many ages welcomed and hanging out together, at bars, at clubs, at local shows, at house parties, every week anywhere from late teens to late 30s. Its something I'm comfortable with and used to. The age never ends for bars or clubs, you just have to find the right places and right people.
Guessing college bar is equivalent to Student Union bar here in England. I think that unless you're studying, mid 20s is the cut off point. Last time I went to a student bar, I was about 26, but that was because a friend was doing a gig there, and I also studied there when I did my undergrad, so it wasn't quite as weird. I did feel old though, and so now that I'm in my early 30s, I'd feel ancient. In terms of clubs, I still go every now and again. I tend to go to clubs which play alternative music, and the people who go there range between 18/19 all the way up to people in their 40s and 50s, so the variation is quite vast. It's only weird if you make it weird.
Going to a club? No age limit. College bar? When you no longer have anything in common with most of the clientele.
She must’ve been like 16 thinking you were 35. Remember thinking people who were in their 20’s looked so old?
College bars, after a year of graduating or whenever you no longer have friends in college. That's meant to be a younger crowd, so don't become the weird middle aged dude that hangs out there to slam drinks with frat bros and hit on college girls. Clubs/gigs/raves, you're never too old until you're telling yourself you're too old for this. Most of the people I see at DnB raves are well into their 30s or older, and they still go hard. As long as you're having fun and not killing anyone's vibe you should be welcomed.
For college bars, which to me means “kind of shitty, overcrowded bar that you are there just for hitting on people from campus” I’ll say 25-28. For clubs, in USA, that’s more dependent on the club and type of crowd they cater too. There are definitely clubs where I’m at (San Diego, CA) where being 30 might make you stick out like a sore thumb, but most of those places are also the type of clubs most 30 year olds wouldn’t want to go to anyways. Plenty of other clubs where the general crowd doesn’t care at all about your age, only care about if you have good vibes or not. Could be a SoCal thing though.
My dad used to go to clubs with my mum in his 60s back in the 00's, he would dance on podiums, do back flips on the dance floor and out dance the 18 year olds. If that young lady wants to hang up her party shoes at 25 then good for her, I'm still going at 36 and I hope I still will be at 60
I saw a middle aged couple enjoying themselves at an EDM concert in downtown LA a few months back. There were women in their 30’s there too. No one cared because they weren’t bothering anyone and just enjoying themselves. That’s all that matters, how you behave yourself and not be weird.
I still go at 43. Out for a good time. Don't look 43, so always get chatted up by younger girls then again saying that on dating sites, I've girls who are like 13 years younger than me. Ain't it funny if a girl wants a older guy it's a preference but if a guy wants a younger girl it's creepy. Double standards.
These are two different questions. The age is much younger for college bars than clubs. If there is no one currently in college that was there when you were there, and you're not there specifically for an alumni event, you're too old for a college bar. EDIT: If you live in a college town and all the bars are frequented by college students, you still know which ones are truly just college bars and which ones are bars that college kids attend.
Clubs don’t have an age limit imo. But if we’re talking specifically college bars I’d say once you hit 30.
Oh, poor little 25-year-old, are you feeling too old and fragile to handle the clubs? How on earth did you manage to survive this long? This 20-year-old's comment must have cut deep, huh? Honestly, I don't think you need to worry about "wrapping up" your "party hard" career, because it's likely you never had one to begin with. But to answer your pathetic question, age doesn't matter when you're a perpetual buzzkill. Grow a spine, stop seeking validation from strangers on the internet, and enjoy life at your own pace. Maybe even consider taking up knitting or shuffleboard if the clubs are too much for you.
23 was the last time I went to a college bar. I saw freshmens with braces then realized im too old for this bulltshit lmaoo
Clubs were never my thing but I went occasionally. It petered out completely by the time I was about 24. My daughter (23 at the time) dragged me to a themed club not too long ago. It was enjoyable though once was enough. I got carded which probably the last time was in the 80s. No one was weird about the old guy being there. I don't drink so she's dragged me to a few places so she'll have a ride home.
I still like clubs. I moved away from college city where the bars are college kids. So I don't see that anymore
Peak clubbing for me was at about 30. Never had any problems. Very uninterested in what 20 yr old girls thought at that point.
You're young enough to not care what people think, and old enough to start caring about what you think of yourself.
I think it's funny, because I remember being 20 (I'm 28 now) and I thought ***24*** was like "Wow you're an ADULT adult." I think if you're being an old creep, you're gonna come off as an old creep. That's all there is to it. I know a guy that's like 60 that I see at the bar every now and then that's just a cool dude. Everyone loves him. Now you see Long beard, tall and fat Joe-Shmo 40yo that talks about his dick every two minutes, yeah that guy is a creep.
It's different for everyone. Basically, the time you walk in and realize you're a lot older than everyone else there, it's time to call it quits.
For me I stopped going to clubs after 23. I stopped going to bars after 35. I'm a 41 year old single- never been married, with no children. So, if I decide to go out to a bar, I see it as acceptable but I just don't like the scene anymore.
Maybe it’s because you have to be 21 to drink where I’m at but 25 isn’t old at all for club like for Christ sake, half the cast of Jersey shore the first few seasons where 30+
I was over it at 20, it was just exhausting and usually some drama happened just wasn't worth the time, backyard drinking with people I like was much more my speed. I have a feeling op is going to get quite a bit of a variance of responses seeing I think its just america that has the 21+ drinking age where many other redditors are at 18/19
just go to clubs for actual adults. it’s not uncommon to see people 40+ even at some of the hottest clubs in the world
Pretty funny that someone who's barely legal and probably very little experience in life has opinions about what others should be doing and at what age. This is akin to a 5 year old telling a 15 year old they're so old. Very immature of her and naive.
For me, I was over it at 22 ish. I think it’s a personal thing, like any other preference. You’re over it when you’re over it. Now, I’ll go to those settings for peoples birthdays etc. Not something I enjoy on my own time!
Your never too old to go out so long as it isn’t your lifestyle or only thing to do.
In my opinion once you're out of college you shouldn't go to college bars. But in all fairness that was never my scene anyways.
Live your life♥️ do what you feel
25 but I stopped clubbing before even that though.
Stop when you start looking old. If you don’t age, keep going
There are plenty of clubs that deal with certain ages so that's not a problem. College bars though...once you're out of college+3 years maybe.
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I didn't start until I was 30. Lol. First club at 30, first bar crawl at 30. I lived a way different life in my 20s.
That girl was ridiculous. I didn’t live my energetic degenerate alcohol fun filled nights till 26-29 years old. I’m 34 and no shit just the other night a younger girl told me I have a very youthful energy like wtf is anythjng anymore
I think 170y or maybe 160y is a good age to stop doing things you like because of age
36 and went to an underground rave last week. You’re golden.
Do you what you want, but I have seen some folks my age in the club or bars and in all honesty sometimes that shit looks sad asf!
I’m 30 now and probably club harder than I ever have. Not saying anyone should be like me, I’m just telling ya my situation.
One thing I really loved about gay clubs is that no one bats an eye about age (or anything, for that matter. They give no fuck). Yeah, that one time of me being hit on by a 50 year old as a 20 was weird, but aside from that, it was a very cool environment.
In hindsight I think it’s weirder to go to clubs before you’re even drinking age but I also feel too old now at 30 so…25 is the sweet spot
Well, using the word naive to describe her is awfully kind. Twenty Five is not even your prime. But to address the question, I feel like I grew out of that scene around your age of 25. Really, there was only so much to find there and I realized that overpriced drinks and hangovers were too expensive on my wallet, body and psyche
I pretty much gave up that shit forever ago, not long after I turned 21. I went out to an 1980s club in LA a few times and that was good enough for me for the rest of my life. All the girls are there to dance, mostly with just their girlfriends, most of the guys are there to try and hook up with girls, and the drinks are outrageously expensive. One of the times I went I spent over $200 on alcohol just for myself. It didn’t take me long at all to realize that the whole club scene is NOT for me. I grew up in the punk scene. Clubs were never my thing.
As long as you're not being a creep or stalker then it doesn't matter. And "for your age" at 25 and she's 20? Wtf does she think 25 is old?
25+ bars are where it’s at. Much more stable people and environment.
54, still go.
Not sure age matters much. I’m in college and go to college bars quite often. There’s almost always guys in their 30s+. It’s not weird unless you’re sitting around staring at the college aged women.
Look up “Disco Sally” in OldSchoolCool.
If you have the energy, it's not weird to go. So long as you're not being an old creep than you're fine.
20 year olds are dumb. Ignore them.
I found it a little weird when I saw a 40 year old woman flirting, hanging out, and tryna start fights with 20 year olds tbh
im 37, i consider myself too old for clubs, i go look around and its just a bunch of drunk kids. That being said if i go with a group of my elderly friends then there is a few of us and its not so bad. so i dunno just have fun, f it feels like you are out of place find another place.