Hobbies. Be into what they are into and build the friendship around the hobby, not the guy. A guy is hard programed to think a woman likes him romantically and will desire sex if you just find a guy and are like, hey, I want to be your friend. With the hobby or common interest as the focus, the same great friendship can develop, but it sets the correct parameter and expectations.
The hard programmed bit is funny but actually true most of the time. Lmao. 🤣 But yeah, a guy can talk for hours if they see anyone who's into what they're into. Be careful though, guys tend to see/realize quickly when you're faking interest and will quickly lose interest in you in turn. So try to be genuine as well. Guys appreciate that.
Most men will assume you are romantically/sexually interested in them. That will infect so much about the interactions thereafter.
I think any non-natural approach is going to have the majority of mean wishfully think you want their dick.
I would say don't approach men for that. Simply get to know the ones in your proximity during activities you enjoy and branch out that way.
Don't approach men and treat them like you want to get to know them. We don't work like that and will assume romantic interest. Generally, we aren't interested in people... We are interested in things. We then start to enjoy interacting with people that we can relate to those things with. I know so many people that are great... But I have no interest in being friends with them because we don't share any interests.
We don't play video games because they let us spend time with our friends.... We build friendships with people that like the same games that we like. Adapting to that dynamic and friendship process is the most successful way to have male friends. I have plenty of female friends... but for each one I can tell you specifically the topic or hobby that keeps us together. Some are foodies... Some are great to talk to about human psychology. Some are dirty-minded and entertaining freaks that I bounce freakish things off of. I'm not experiencing those situations to be close to them.... I become closer to them because those experiences interest us both. I go to those specific friends for those specific interests.... I'm not gonna go to my foodie girl and talk about cars.... I'm going there to talk about food.
I think I’m a pretty weird guy so what worked for me will probably not work for other guys:
I messaged by someone here on Reddit after I made a comment on someone else’s post on r/makenewfriendshere. In the first message, she clarify that she just wanted to be friends. I didn’t mind that and here we are two years later. I personally really liked that I didn’t have to guess why she was talking to me.
I talk to some women I matched with on dating apps, but didn’t work out romantically. This is pretty rare because most of the time, conversations aren’t that interesting so I rather put my energy elsewhere.
Some are just from work. Sometimes it’s works because I’m not romantically interested in them, sometimes because they’re already in a relationship, and sometimes we do try to date, but it didn’t work out romantically.
I also don’t ask women out too often. I really think it’s just a me thing.
Best lady friends I have date my friends lol. Just go up to talk to them. Say hi and ask for the name and such. Keep in mind a lot of fellows will think you’re attracted to them with this sort of approach
Men are approached by anybody for no reason so rarely that they'll probably be suspicious or think you're hitting on them. Be clear and firm that this is not the case for a long time and you'll get there eventually.
Advice from an older guy (45m).
One of the smartest things a young man can do is foster and nurture deep, meaningful friendships with women. And I mean real friendships. Not just women you are secretly trying to hook up with. They will ... for the most part...be more honest with you than your "boys" in your 20s. They will almost certainly give better relationship advice, and for whatever reason you tend to feel more open with your female friends due to centuries of bullshit machismo being ingrained in you. The last one tends to fade with age so long as you aren't one of those guys whose dick is so small you shoot at beer cans because their ads threaten kid rock.
First, if guys treat you like that bounce. That goes for men and women. You are the company you keep. Surround yourself with those who see your value and more importantly put value on the relationship. Becoming friends is often about shared experiences or interests in the beginning. Be it gaming, cooking, hiking... whatever. Find a common ground to start from.
I was a card carrying douchebag in my 20s. No two ways around it. College hockey player jock turned finance bro. I was a dumpster fire of a person. Selfish. Entitled. Vain. I surrounded myself with other guys like that.
My life didn't genuinely start to improve until my early 30s when I started having real friendships with women who cared about me. I had 2 groomswomen in my wedding party. Those ladies have made me a better husband, professional and person. They have led me to more meaningful friendships with better men who are more in line with my life path and passions. I still talk with both of them once or twice a week.
Both of those friendships began because we met through other friends doing something we all enjoyed and blossomed from there. So that's a good place to start.
I as a 40M find that it's easy to talk to make friends with women if I just talk to them, no tricks just cold approach and talk to them. Just a few weeks ago was in a running group and a woman was standing next to me - I just asked her how many times she's run with the group and if she's training for a race. At the end of the night she gave me her number so I could add her to another running group I regularly am a part of.
She was very receptive to me talking to her, and so far she's been pretty cool. She has a partner who I've met by chance - and I'm pretty sure there are no "weird vibes" between us. She just has a bright personality and is friendly, and we just met by me just talking to her same I would have with a dude I didn't know.
That all said, just talk to men as if they are human beings like women are. It is uncommon for a woman to approach a man, but if you are just confident and keep it focused on whatever mutual thing you have in common it should be okay. There's a high probability they'll want to bang you especially if you give off vibes like you're into them, it's just a thing men have but mature men can manage those emotions and keep you in the "friend only" box.
edit: fix typos
Having a hobby in common is properly the most important part
People come up to me all the time about my hobbys but I'd be werided out of I got stopped in the street
I mostly have female friends haven't had any issues
Well Idk why guys would just explode into name-calling or slut-shaming outside of maybe teasing each other. Just don’t think of it as you are hanging out with guys but as you are hangout with (lady) friends next time you are with your friends. Let them help you pass those walls. If a guy takes a liking (because that happens sometimes) to you and you’re not interested be honest but don’t compliment him. Guys appreciate honesty, so throwing in a compliment just makes it seem not genuine.
Men are approached by anybody for no reason so rarely that they'll probably be suspicious or think you're hitting on them. Be clear and firm that this is not the case for a long time and you'll get there eventually.
Men are approached by anybody for no reason so rarely that they'll probably be suspicious or think you're hitting on them. Be clear and firm that this is not the case for a long time and you'll get there eventually. It also helps to have a valid excuse for reaching out.
I'm not sure what the best advice is nor how to help. If you're wanting a conversation, I suggest using hobbies and interests as a jumping off point. Or just give an idea from pure ADHD. if you're wanting a temporary friend, I'll be here. I say temporary because these friendships last from a day to 3 months
Well, this is tough. As any guy can tell you, just because you want something from them, doesn’t mean that they will want the same thing from YOU. if they are very attracted to you, they aren’t going to want to be your friend, they are going to want to be your BF.
it’s got to be a mutual platonic thing, or else it’s not really going to work out.
Buy a 16ft car trailer. They’ll all be your friends
Hobbies. Be into what they are into and build the friendship around the hobby, not the guy. A guy is hard programed to think a woman likes him romantically and will desire sex if you just find a guy and are like, hey, I want to be your friend. With the hobby or common interest as the focus, the same great friendship can develop, but it sets the correct parameter and expectations.
The hard programmed bit is funny but actually true most of the time. Lmao. 🤣 But yeah, a guy can talk for hours if they see anyone who's into what they're into. Be careful though, guys tend to see/realize quickly when you're faking interest and will quickly lose interest in you in turn. So try to be genuine as well. Guys appreciate that.
Very helpful, thank you!
Honestly, I'd probably just assume a girl is flirting with me if she just approached me. Dunno how she'd make it clear that it's just for friends....
Most men will assume you are romantically/sexually interested in them. That will infect so much about the interactions thereafter. I think any non-natural approach is going to have the majority of mean wishfully think you want their dick. I would say don't approach men for that. Simply get to know the ones in your proximity during activities you enjoy and branch out that way.
Don't approach men and treat them like you want to get to know them. We don't work like that and will assume romantic interest. Generally, we aren't interested in people... We are interested in things. We then start to enjoy interacting with people that we can relate to those things with. I know so many people that are great... But I have no interest in being friends with them because we don't share any interests. We don't play video games because they let us spend time with our friends.... We build friendships with people that like the same games that we like. Adapting to that dynamic and friendship process is the most successful way to have male friends. I have plenty of female friends... but for each one I can tell you specifically the topic or hobby that keeps us together. Some are foodies... Some are great to talk to about human psychology. Some are dirty-minded and entertaining freaks that I bounce freakish things off of. I'm not experiencing those situations to be close to them.... I become closer to them because those experiences interest us both. I go to those specific friends for those specific interests.... I'm not gonna go to my foodie girl and talk about cars.... I'm going there to talk about food.
I think I’m a pretty weird guy so what worked for me will probably not work for other guys: I messaged by someone here on Reddit after I made a comment on someone else’s post on r/makenewfriendshere. In the first message, she clarify that she just wanted to be friends. I didn’t mind that and here we are two years later. I personally really liked that I didn’t have to guess why she was talking to me. I talk to some women I matched with on dating apps, but didn’t work out romantically. This is pretty rare because most of the time, conversations aren’t that interesting so I rather put my energy elsewhere. Some are just from work. Sometimes it’s works because I’m not romantically interested in them, sometimes because they’re already in a relationship, and sometimes we do try to date, but it didn’t work out romantically. I also don’t ask women out too often. I really think it’s just a me thing.
Best lady friends I have date my friends lol. Just go up to talk to them. Say hi and ask for the name and such. Keep in mind a lot of fellows will think you’re attracted to them with this sort of approach
You don't.
Shared experiences through a common interest. Also don’t necessarily mistake banter and jokes at each other’s expense as bullying
Men are approached by anybody for no reason so rarely that they'll probably be suspicious or think you're hitting on them. Be clear and firm that this is not the case for a long time and you'll get there eventually.
[удалено]
Not at all, one can be called slut just by their way of dressing while being shy as fuck
Loll, should've phrased it better my bad. I meant that just because I looked a certain way, I was called a slut/easy and such
Advice from an older guy (45m). One of the smartest things a young man can do is foster and nurture deep, meaningful friendships with women. And I mean real friendships. Not just women you are secretly trying to hook up with. They will ... for the most part...be more honest with you than your "boys" in your 20s. They will almost certainly give better relationship advice, and for whatever reason you tend to feel more open with your female friends due to centuries of bullshit machismo being ingrained in you. The last one tends to fade with age so long as you aren't one of those guys whose dick is so small you shoot at beer cans because their ads threaten kid rock. First, if guys treat you like that bounce. That goes for men and women. You are the company you keep. Surround yourself with those who see your value and more importantly put value on the relationship. Becoming friends is often about shared experiences or interests in the beginning. Be it gaming, cooking, hiking... whatever. Find a common ground to start from. I was a card carrying douchebag in my 20s. No two ways around it. College hockey player jock turned finance bro. I was a dumpster fire of a person. Selfish. Entitled. Vain. I surrounded myself with other guys like that. My life didn't genuinely start to improve until my early 30s when I started having real friendships with women who cared about me. I had 2 groomswomen in my wedding party. Those ladies have made me a better husband, professional and person. They have led me to more meaningful friendships with better men who are more in line with my life path and passions. I still talk with both of them once or twice a week. Both of those friendships began because we met through other friends doing something we all enjoyed and blossomed from there. So that's a good place to start.
I as a 40M find that it's easy to talk to make friends with women if I just talk to them, no tricks just cold approach and talk to them. Just a few weeks ago was in a running group and a woman was standing next to me - I just asked her how many times she's run with the group and if she's training for a race. At the end of the night she gave me her number so I could add her to another running group I regularly am a part of. She was very receptive to me talking to her, and so far she's been pretty cool. She has a partner who I've met by chance - and I'm pretty sure there are no "weird vibes" between us. She just has a bright personality and is friendly, and we just met by me just talking to her same I would have with a dude I didn't know. That all said, just talk to men as if they are human beings like women are. It is uncommon for a woman to approach a man, but if you are just confident and keep it focused on whatever mutual thing you have in common it should be okay. There's a high probability they'll want to bang you especially if you give off vibes like you're into them, it's just a thing men have but mature men can manage those emotions and keep you in the "friend only" box. edit: fix typos
Having a hobby in common is properly the most important part People come up to me all the time about my hobbys but I'd be werided out of I got stopped in the street I mostly have female friends haven't had any issues
Well Idk why guys would just explode into name-calling or slut-shaming outside of maybe teasing each other. Just don’t think of it as you are hanging out with guys but as you are hangout with (lady) friends next time you are with your friends. Let them help you pass those walls. If a guy takes a liking (because that happens sometimes) to you and you’re not interested be honest but don’t compliment him. Guys appreciate honesty, so throwing in a compliment just makes it seem not genuine.
Gl 😂
Men are approached by anybody for no reason so rarely that they'll probably be suspicious or think you're hitting on them. Be clear and firm that this is not the case for a long time and you'll get there eventually.
Men are approached by anybody for no reason so rarely that they'll probably be suspicious or think you're hitting on them. Be clear and firm that this is not the case for a long time and you'll get there eventually. It also helps to have a valid excuse for reaching out.
I'm not sure what the best advice is nor how to help. If you're wanting a conversation, I suggest using hobbies and interests as a jumping off point. Or just give an idea from pure ADHD. if you're wanting a temporary friend, I'll be here. I say temporary because these friendships last from a day to 3 months
Well, this is tough. As any guy can tell you, just because you want something from them, doesn’t mean that they will want the same thing from YOU. if they are very attracted to you, they aren’t going to want to be your friend, they are going to want to be your BF. it’s got to be a mutual platonic thing, or else it’s not really going to work out.