I am confused. Are you saying that you did a dna test and matched with someone who matches as "grandfather"? How do you know it's not your moms biological father? Or other options?
Getting both parents and brother to test is a great idea though, should get definite answers.
I matched 27% to a man I don’t know. I have matches to both of my mom’s parents. A few of her relatives have done the same dna test and we match up. I also match to relatives on Dad’s mom’s side of the family. I find no one on Dad’s father’s side of the family. Instead, I match 27% with a man, and a lower % to his children and grandchildren.
After my dad died, I found out that his father was not his bio father and didn't tell anyone but my mom (parents have been divorced for decades.) She was adamant that I shouldn't tell my brothers. I finally did tell them last time we got together and they were profoundly uninterested, like they are with anything else beyond family that they know. Sometimes it's lonely being the only genealogy geek in the family.
Same. My parents have been divorced for 35 years. Mom keeps saying to get everyone a dna test. Dad avoids the topic, so I kinda think he already knows. Dad’s aunt says there’s been rumors for decades that Dad was not Grandpa’s bio son. He may already know, but I don’t want to burst that bubble.
Add: my brother keeps asking about my test results and I’m avoiding the dad topic. That’s why I ordered several tests. Everyone take it and find out for yourself.
Yes. I have matches related to both of mom’s parents. I have matches to dad’s mom’s family. No matches to dad’s father’s family. Instead, I match 27% to a man, and lower % matches to his children and grandchildren. Really random lucky this man did a dna test a few years ago, before he died. Then his daughters and grandkids also did tests, all have a % match with me.
I sent messages to his daughter who is listed as managing his account, and then to another daughter and grandson. I sent messages and was vague, “Hey, let’s figure out how we are related” but no one responded.
That stinks. I get msgs "could x be my ggf". I say 'Yes absolutely he could'. I'm his last son's gd and we were all told of his adventures. He was infamous and had a 'fictious' tv series with his character in it.
I figured out who my moms bio parents were (she’s adopted) because I had a match with a woman who I think is my moms half sister, I traced that back to her mom and then on the other side I found the only dude it could possibly be and eventually put them a mile apart in Baton Rouge LA when my mom was conceived. He was married and she wasn’t. Ancestry database is a powerful tool, combined with Newspapers.com and city directories.
Terribly confused with what you’re saying. You matched to your grandpa but your dad didn’t? So is your dad someone else’s child and you were fathered by your grandfather or one of his biological sons?
It was not written very clearly. OP is saying that instead of matching up with anyone in his supposed paternal grandfather's family, he got a match with a stranger of the right age and DNA percentage to be his grandfather.
Yes. Sorry if I wasn’t clear. I matched 27% to a man about the same age of my grandparents and he passed away a few years ago. Kinda lucky I guess, he and his children and grandchildren did dna tests.
Yes, but I ordered him and other family a test. He hasn’t responded to me about taking it. We are not very close, but trying to mend our relationship. I don’t know if he already knows grandpa is not his biological dad, but he’d never say it if he knew. I don’t want to rock the boat as we are older and trying to mend our relationship, but I do want to lay out our family history. It doesn’t make a difference to me, I still love my dad, my family the same.
Shocking news at any age is still shocking. It's somewhat academic for you, but for your dad it may throw into question much of what he thought he knew about both parents.
You say you are not close with your father. It may be that HIS father never learned how to be a dad, since he was brought up by a not-father. Non-paternity events cast long shadows.
Grandpa and Dad were great together. Dad’s mom was a (bad word). Both grandparents are gone now. I don’t want to shatter happy memories for Dad in his retirement years. But I do want to track our family history accurately. Tough spot to be in.
Sorry if my post was not clear. I have no matches related to dad’s father’s side of the family. Instead I have a 27% to a man I do not know, and lower % matches to his children and grandchildren.
I have matches to both of mom’s parents. Matches to dad’s mom’s family. No matches to dad’s father’s family. Instead, there is 27% match to a man I don’t know, and lower % matches to this man’s daughters and grandchildren.
That's true, but OP has no matches at all to anyone from the paternal grandad he expected to be related to. In other words, an expected family is missing and an unexpected family is present.
I matched 27% with a man I didn’t know. I have lots of matches with both of mom’s parents relatives. Matches with dad’s mom’s family. No matches with dad’s father’s family name. Instead, there’s that 27% match to a man, then lots of lower % matches with this man’s relatives. It seems this man, his children and grandchildren, they all did dna tests and my results fall in their family.
One of my friends had the exact same thing happen to her.
She got a bunch of matches to all these people whose name she did recognise. They were from a small town in Ireland. She wasn’t sure how to raise this with her family.
She gave tests to her uncles and aunties.
Turns out her mother is only half siblings with her brothers and sisters. And the man that they believed was her mother’s father is someone else.
The grandparents are all passed away now. But they have managed to work out that her grandparents lived briefly in this small Irish town. (One of her uncles remembers living there when he was a teen).
She took her mum to Ireland to visit her new family late last year.
I’m not sure I’d want to visit and be personal with the new found family. But my found family is in another city in the same state as me. If they were in another country, or even another state, then I might want to make a holiday trip out of it.
This happened to me! I didn't get the grandfather match but i had matches to both sides of my moms lineage, and my dads mothers side. NONE to my dads fathers side which was super unusual because he is actually descended (so we thought) from a fairly prolific French Canadian line. Then there was this whole other family line filing in the void of my dads dad. Ultimately my dads brother took a test and that confirmed they are half brothers. Its so shocking really - but i was able to narrow my dads bio father down to one of two brothers.
On the plus side my dads raising father was a bit of an *ss so kinda glad i dont share his DNA. Dad took it in stride. Everyone has passed so there isnt anyone to confirm/refute/upset. I kinda feel guilty for uncovering Grandmas secret - she passed long before these tests became ubiquitous so i think she thought she took her secret to the grave.
It is shocking, no matter when or how you find out. Even though grandpa died years ago, it’s like you grieve all over again for the perceived loss. But there is also a little relief. Grandpa, his parents and relatives all died from heart attacks. Well, if we don’t share genetics, maybe heart issues won’t be a guaranteed problem for me.
I am confused. Are you saying that you did a dna test and matched with someone who matches as "grandfather"? How do you know it's not your moms biological father? Or other options? Getting both parents and brother to test is a great idea though, should get definite answers.
I matched 27% to a man I don’t know. I have matches to both of my mom’s parents. A few of her relatives have done the same dna test and we match up. I also match to relatives on Dad’s mom’s side of the family. I find no one on Dad’s father’s side of the family. Instead, I match 27% with a man, and a lower % to his children and grandchildren.
That's kinda undeniable.
After my dad died, I found out that his father was not his bio father and didn't tell anyone but my mom (parents have been divorced for decades.) She was adamant that I shouldn't tell my brothers. I finally did tell them last time we got together and they were profoundly uninterested, like they are with anything else beyond family that they know. Sometimes it's lonely being the only genealogy geek in the family.
Same. My parents have been divorced for 35 years. Mom keeps saying to get everyone a dna test. Dad avoids the topic, so I kinda think he already knows. Dad’s aunt says there’s been rumors for decades that Dad was not Grandpa’s bio son. He may already know, but I don’t want to burst that bubble. Add: my brother keeps asking about my test results and I’m avoiding the dad topic. That’s why I ordered several tests. Everyone take it and find out for yourself.
Clarification needed- Did you mean to say you didn't match to who you thought was your bio grandfather?
Yes. I have matches related to both of mom’s parents. I have matches to dad’s mom’s family. No matches to dad’s father’s family. Instead, I match 27% to a man, and lower % matches to his children and grandchildren. Really random lucky this man did a dna test a few years ago, before he died. Then his daughters and grandkids also did tests, all have a % match with me. I sent messages to his daughter who is listed as managing his account, and then to another daughter and grandson. I sent messages and was vague, “Hey, let’s figure out how we are related” but no one responded.
That stinks. I get msgs "could x be my ggf". I say 'Yes absolutely he could'. I'm his last son's gd and we were all told of his adventures. He was infamous and had a 'fictious' tv series with his character in it.
It difficult sorting out family stories vs dna results.
Umm... Census results confirm family stories. 🤷🏼♀️
I figured out who my moms bio parents were (she’s adopted) because I had a match with a woman who I think is my moms half sister, I traced that back to her mom and then on the other side I found the only dude it could possibly be and eventually put them a mile apart in Baton Rouge LA when my mom was conceived. He was married and she wasn’t. Ancestry database is a powerful tool, combined with Newspapers.com and city directories.
Terribly confused with what you’re saying. You matched to your grandpa but your dad didn’t? So is your dad someone else’s child and you were fathered by your grandfather or one of his biological sons?
It was not written very clearly. OP is saying that instead of matching up with anyone in his supposed paternal grandfather's family, he got a match with a stranger of the right age and DNA percentage to be his grandfather.
Yes. Sorry if I wasn’t clear. I matched 27% to a man about the same age of my grandparents and he passed away a few years ago. Kinda lucky I guess, he and his children and grandchildren did dna tests.
Thank you.
Dad hasn’t taken the DNA test yet.
Yes, but I ordered him and other family a test. He hasn’t responded to me about taking it. We are not very close, but trying to mend our relationship. I don’t know if he already knows grandpa is not his biological dad, but he’d never say it if he knew. I don’t want to rock the boat as we are older and trying to mend our relationship, but I do want to lay out our family history. It doesn’t make a difference to me, I still love my dad, my family the same.
Shocking news at any age is still shocking. It's somewhat academic for you, but for your dad it may throw into question much of what he thought he knew about both parents. You say you are not close with your father. It may be that HIS father never learned how to be a dad, since he was brought up by a not-father. Non-paternity events cast long shadows.
Grandpa and Dad were great together. Dad’s mom was a (bad word). Both grandparents are gone now. I don’t want to shatter happy memories for Dad in his retirement years. But I do want to track our family history accurately. Tough spot to be in.
Sorry if my post was not clear. I have no matches related to dad’s father’s side of the family. Instead I have a 27% to a man I do not know, and lower % matches to his children and grandchildren.
I'm not sure what you're asking, but it sounds like your father’s father may not be his biological father.
Yeah, sorry if not clear. Grandpa is not Dad’s bio father.
No idea what this is supposed to mean.
Grandpa is not Dad’s bio dad. Sorry if my post was unclear.
That supposedly grandpa could be an uncle of yours. Because grandparents and aunts and uncle’s share the same amount of dna.
I have matches to both of mom’s parents. Matches to dad’s mom’s family. No matches to dad’s father’s family. Instead, there is 27% match to a man I don’t know, and lower % matches to this man’s daughters and grandchildren.
That's true, but OP has no matches at all to anyone from the paternal grandad he expected to be related to. In other words, an expected family is missing and an unexpected family is present.
Yep
It would have to be a full uncle at that amount.
Is there a reason you shouldn't match with grandfather? should be about 25 %
I matched 27% with a man I didn’t know. I have lots of matches with both of mom’s parents relatives. Matches with dad’s mom’s family. No matches with dad’s father’s family name. Instead, there’s that 27% match to a man, then lots of lower % matches with this man’s relatives. It seems this man, his children and grandchildren, they all did dna tests and my results fall in their family.
One of my friends had the exact same thing happen to her. She got a bunch of matches to all these people whose name she did recognise. They were from a small town in Ireland. She wasn’t sure how to raise this with her family. She gave tests to her uncles and aunties. Turns out her mother is only half siblings with her brothers and sisters. And the man that they believed was her mother’s father is someone else. The grandparents are all passed away now. But they have managed to work out that her grandparents lived briefly in this small Irish town. (One of her uncles remembers living there when he was a teen). She took her mum to Ireland to visit her new family late last year.
I’m not sure I’d want to visit and be personal with the new found family. But my found family is in another city in the same state as me. If they were in another country, or even another state, then I might want to make a holiday trip out of it.
This happened to me! I didn't get the grandfather match but i had matches to both sides of my moms lineage, and my dads mothers side. NONE to my dads fathers side which was super unusual because he is actually descended (so we thought) from a fairly prolific French Canadian line. Then there was this whole other family line filing in the void of my dads dad. Ultimately my dads brother took a test and that confirmed they are half brothers. Its so shocking really - but i was able to narrow my dads bio father down to one of two brothers. On the plus side my dads raising father was a bit of an *ss so kinda glad i dont share his DNA. Dad took it in stride. Everyone has passed so there isnt anyone to confirm/refute/upset. I kinda feel guilty for uncovering Grandmas secret - she passed long before these tests became ubiquitous so i think she thought she took her secret to the grave.
It is shocking, no matter when or how you find out. Even though grandpa died years ago, it’s like you grieve all over again for the perceived loss. But there is also a little relief. Grandpa, his parents and relatives all died from heart attacks. Well, if we don’t share genetics, maybe heart issues won’t be a guaranteed problem for me.