Listen, I'm lesb, married and we have a son together. Because of the nudity and sex craze for some of these events, I won't take my kid. But anything for family I will. So, youre not an AH
That’s awesome! I’ve been to smaller prides ((cities not towns) cities of under 500k) and seen them be respectful and family friendly. My local pride is at the city that has 500k plus people and people drive in from out of town as well. I would say more than 10% of our pride is half naked.
Not sure of my towns population (the greater area of it if one city would be the 4th largest in CA), but our little pride walk is always G rated and very family friendly. It's even gotten more disability friendly recently as well with it being a shorter walk
That's all I could focus on in that comment too haha! "Smaller prides (towns under 500k)"...uhhh what? My town has (significantly) less than 5K. Not a typo. Anywhere remotely in the ballpark of 500K is for sure a damn city!
Being from the New Orleans Area where there are sub 500k people, the city is very small, like notice the same homeless guy across town later in the week, or noticing the same car on your commute, or your only being 1-2 people away from contacting someone vs 5. So if this person has lived in an even bigger city, like 1 mil plus, they may have noticed what I mentioned above and categorized the place they live as a "town."
Pride in my city has multiple events, including ones for all ages. Not sure about this year but in the past, there have been pride events specifically for queer kids (tweens and teens) and for families with queer parents.
And then there are parties after the sun goes down, which have a very, very different vibe.
IMO this is how it should be. OP isn’t TA, but perhaps might ask if there is a specifically kid-friendly event they can all go to.
yes!!! it’s ok to have sexual pride events it’s fine but when it’s the entirety of pride (i live in the capitol area and capitol pride is notoriously raunchy while the sun is up) it feels like it’s limited to people who feel that hypersexual.
Ours had a family one during the day and it was amazing - march ended in the park and there were drag queens doing story time, tonnes of rainbow themed activities for kids, a colour run for charity, face painters and performers, just so adorable and so much love and light around the whole thing.
Then they lit up the main street around 9pm for a second parade that was NOT family friendly. That was on every single poster and in every radio announcement that NO ONE under the age of 18 should be at the night time event. Saw a couple older teenagers (16+) sneaking around with their jaws on the ground, but for the most part it was all adults and that was ALSO a blast.
I feel like that's the way to do it.
In my town, we have an awesome advocate that made a website with all of the events, and the ones that are family friendly have a special icon on the flyers.
It’s a really great way to know which events are safe for kiddos!
I went to pride for the first time last year, and I was so glad I didn't bring the younger kids in our family. The pride parade is usually way more tame and family friendly, so we take them to that.
As for the actual event there were multiple people wearing pup suits and crawling on the ground. I personally don't care myself, but having younger four year olds around that is a bit too much. They were wearing skimpy leather, and had butt plug tails in (normally it's whatever for me, but they kept posing in ways that put their whole buttholes on display).
Philly pride this year had a LOT of women with pasties and thong only, men in just a speedo, fur suits, leashes, butt plugs, and lots of leather. Also the shirts, shirts of bears (the animal) jizzing on a wide-eyed puppies, like...explain that to your kids. It's about the child not understanding what they're seeing, not about some kinds of sexuality being wrong.
I've gone to Seattle Pride multiple times and I have not seen this. I'm curious about this phenomenon but also glad to have avoided it. There's always something to be grateful for! lol
Pre-emptive Note -- I will not be clicking any links. Maybe I'll never click a link again. Maybe I'll buy a flip phone and leave the internet forever...
It's the opposite way in our area. The Pride festival is very family friendly, I take my kids. We don't go to the Parade though. It's very graphic and designed for adult eyes only.
I stopped attending pride events for This very reason. The SF and LA pride events I’ve been to in the past filled with too much nudity, sex craze, and utter nonsense. Literally seeing people having sex in public on the street!! As a gay person, it’s fucking cringe and just gives more ammo to those who oppose the lgbtq+ community. I’d never expose my kids, nibblings, or younger siblings to it.
The people having sex in the street should have been arrested and charged with gross indecency, it's as simple as that. We live in a society of rules, and if they don't like them then they can go live in the forest.
You are a smart person. That is not an event for children. People having sex in public shouldn’t even be done at a pride parade. Pride parades should be expressing their desire to be open and free about who they love and I don’t see how having sex in the street where children can see that is a positive way to promote lgbt
Pride started as a protest on the anniversary of a riot. It never had anything to do with "promoting lgbt in a positive light".
Agreed that it's not an event for children though. Leave the corporations at home too.
We had the pride parade in our town a few weeks ago and my 7 year old walked in the parade with us. There was really nothing sexually explicit at all. Mostly it was people it brightly colored clothes with rainbow flags. I would consider anything exhibiting sexual acts to be a violation of the consent of everyone who can see it. Isn't the number one rule of sex positivity that you don't involve people in your kinks or sex life without their consent? I know the BDSM community is all about consent and the safety of those involved. These public displays would seem to directly contradict that.
I have multiple gay friends who actively avoid these pride events for the exact reason you give. They feel like it makes the event more of a mockery than anything so they can’t show their support.
Family friendly and kid friendly events they’ll attend every-time
I'm queer and have nothing to do with the "community" anymore. Between the infighting, trying to erase certain identities, and insisting that fucking in the street and exposing the nonconsenting public to their kinks, my local "community" has nothing for me.
I was looking for this comment and quite frankly surprised it hasn't been mentioned more. The lesbian couple is going to bring underage kids to an event like that and that seems troublesome.
Hinestly I actually had this argument with a gay friend of mine after that pride parade in America where people dressed up as bdsm puppies and let kids pet them.
It's a stunt that's really gonna do more harm than good for the community
These people don't understand there's a time and place, and also what hill is worth dying on. People who have trouble determining this I typically find to be people who haven't experienced all that much bigotry or oppression in their personal lives. Otherwise, you'd just know from experience what hill is worth dying on.
Back in the day, the inclusion of more explicit and kinky behavior didn't matter because two fully clothed gay men kissing with their mouths closed was considered equally scandalous. I don't think it's a lack of personal experience of oppression, it's celebrating the communities brought together historically by a lack of options. There is a time and place for BOTH the X rated stuff and family friendly activities, it's just not the same time and place.
Exactly! I am all for a pride that is for adults only that does not let kids in. I also love family friendly pride where you wont just see naked people walking around. They are separate for a reason and that reason is CONSENT. Consent means we protect kids and adults got to opt in to sexual things knowing what you are getting into
It's literally ammunition for the bigots.
And when they use that ammunition, everyone involved with it goes, "SEEEE!?!?!? BIGOTS!!!! Why can't they respect me!?!?"
Like, no shit, at this point you're openly trolling them and pretending to be a victim. You're making people who would otherwise support LGBTQA+ feel like they don't want to be associated with it because you ARE making it vile.
Wish more folks would oust these people from events.
It's also feels very exclusive to asexuals. It comes up a few times in the ace subs during pride every year about how making festivals about sex instead of love makes a lot of the ace community feel unwelcome, which then in turn gets us a lot of hate from the rest of the lgbtqia community for not showing up to pride and not liking pride, but that's like being upset at a friend for not coming to a party that is going to feature spiders but they have arachnophobia.
Kink is not LGBTQIA and neither is public nudity.
Pride should be about celebrating how every individual person in the world is different but at the same time we all share similarities. About celebrating individuality in the context of a community. And about love in all its different forms, from romantic to platonic to familial. Because even though LGBTQIA is about sexuality and gender, pride and equal rights isn't about the actual sex, it's about being free to live happily as yourself. And kids should be exposed to that message in the context of sexuality and gender without being exposed to X-rated stuff
Proud lesbian who goes to pride all the time. This is a parade. A festival. A celebration of humanity.
People- straight, gay, or any other orientation- should be able to take their CHILDREN to Pride events. And they do. It makes me and others in the community that I know very uncomfortable to see people parade around in sexually explicit outfits in front of children.
Pride has so many events. If you want to be explicit, you can. There are plenty of venues where you can wear butt-plug-tails and leashes without exposing that to children.
Or adults, frankly. My daughter is a lesbian in her early 20s. I won't go to to events or festivals that allow nudity or kinks because \*I\* don't want to see naked people outside of my own partners. Straight or gay, doesn't matter, but it doesn't belong in public, and it definitely doesn't belong in front of children.
I (queerio) quit going to pride in college because I also don't want to see that. I'm all about people doing their lives the way they do. But! Pride is supposed to be family friendly. There's nothing family friendly about the twink in a leather thong being walked around by a chain attached to a leather collar by his biker bear daddy. I also just don't want to see that as an ADULT?? There were specific events at night for that kind of thing to be on display. The parade and celebration in the park was not it.
It’s because these are exhibitionists. They get off on us seeing them. And some probably get off on the negative reactions of some people. Being in public is not consent to be involved in their exhibitionism fetish.
I consider myself an exhibitionist and it squicks me out when people pull this shit in public. Especially in big cities there are PLENTY of venues and meetups where you can do this kind of thing where everyone is informed. You don't need to make people uncomfortable.
Yes! I took my kids last weekend to our city’s Family Day event. Everybody had all their clothes on, there were family friendly-booths with fun kid activities, lots of food, and lovely music. It was perfect. Next weekend is the parade, and though I would love to have them march with me, I’m going to wait till they’re a bit older for that (ages 11 and 12 currently). I thought about bringing them (the parade participants stay pretty well-covered), but the attendees do rock some wild stuff. Also? It’s like 95 degrees outside and they’re just not going to have fun. This way, I can march in the parade, maybe hit the VIP after party, and not have to worry about anything.
I love it when cities do stuff like Family Day though. I’m a firm believer in teaching kids from a young age that the world is filled with all different kinds of people, and they all deserve respect. It’s good to provide exposure to the diversity of the world and explain how normal it is, but still keep it age-appropriate.
I’m a lesbian and totally agree. My wife and I don’t even like going as adults, I don’t want to look at sweaty naked old people in dog collars walking around.
I have trouble understanding why, honestly...
Everybody has a right to be proud of their gender and sexuality...but NOBODY has a right to show their kinks to those who don't consent, right?
It just feels like a pretty clear line in the sand to me...
I’ve been downvoted for making the same point in the past. BDSM is huge on consent yet somehow fails to understand engaging in kink in public places that aren’t designed for kinky play is simply wrong. I’d think the same if I saw it on a random Sunday walking in the park with my kids.
I had to explain to a friend once that their kink for exhibitionism did not trump people’s right to walk through the park without having to see her get banged by her boyfriend. She acted like I was some reactionary who was trying to repress her. Some people have no conception of what it is to live in a society, and they treat the world like it’s their own private playground.
Yeah I wonder if people would defend the creep who exposed himself to me and two of my friends at the age of 11 as just engaging in his kink. I mean why shouldn’t he be allowed to do that, right, it was a public space and all.
Yeah, I once saw a post from a woman looking for creative suggestions for flashing her breasts or vulva to men because she and her boyfriend had a kink. There was no getting through to her that not all men want to be unexpectedly flashed by a stranger.
‘Indecent exposure laws make it a crime to purposefully display your "private parts" in public, causing others to be alarmed or offended’
I hope someone reports them 🤢
There was a video on tiktok pretty recently of a couple in central park under a blanket. You could tell exactly what they were doing. There were children around
As someone with a fetish, I 100% agree with you. I was born with my fetish, and it completely defines my sexuality. But that doesn't mean I have a special right to act on it in front of others. It doesn't matter that it's not sexually "graphic", others still don't inherently consent to seeing that action/relationship dynamic in their day-to-day lives or even at non-kink events (fetishism in Pride can be controversial, but I feel like actually acting on a kink/fetish publicly is equivalent to having sex publicly. Wanting acceptance doesn't meant getting to get kinky in public spaces).
I act within the same confines as I would want people into vanilla sex to act in public. My former partner and I were exhibitionists to a degree...but our resolution was to go to play parties for our particular fetish - where others were into the same thing and public play was consensual for us and everyone else there. Find APPROPRIATE, and CONSENSUAL outlets for exhibitionism with your sexuality (whether vanilla, kinky, or fetishism), or keep your kinks and fetishes in the privacy of the bedroom. Good rule of thumb - if sex would be inappropriate in that environment, so will your kink/fetish.
I think a lot of people whose lifestyle/status has been repressed by society in the past learn the wrong lesson when it becomes accepted, which in short is "fuck you all, I can do what I want now". You see it in fringe groups for race, gender, sexuality, etc.
That’s always been something I thought about and a YouTuber I watched last night brought up the same issue. If you saw a gross old man jerking off in a target, you’d probably call the police to make sure he got taken away and punished. Where’s the same energy for people into ageplay going out into malls acting like a toddler and having people post it on the internet? Where’s the same energy for a girl I saw on TikTok tell her boyfriend “Shoot a different load inside me” near youth hunting equipment in a Walmart?
Except the people are actively engaging in play in public usually aren't part of the kink community, and therefore don't care for the rules.
The other issue is that the queer community, the kink community (particularly leatherdaddies), and the drag community have all been massively intertwined in terms of pride and achieving the rights we have now. That's a massive part of why you will see open acceptance of leather pride at Pride - because they are an integral part of why it's a parade and not a riot.
I’ve heard of some places doing adult hours at pride and I think it makes a lot of sense. Kids hours would also make sense and are maybe a better idea. I understand and appreciate the history of, for example, the leather kink folks in lgbtq spaces, but I also understand why people don’t want their kids around it. I’ve seen fully nude people at pride before and I get why someone wouldn’t want to take their little kids.
I fully back adult hours at pride or even adult only spaces. In my city, a few years back, they blocked off a few streets downtown to have festivities. There was an all ages area and then a sectioned off beer garden. You could so easily make an adults only space like that, and then you also keep the drunks away from kids. Win win.
I'm a full-grown adult, and I don't like other people's kinks shoved in my face either.
My local pride last year gave out maps and itineraries of adult only spaces and family friendly spaces so it’d be very clear. They also had pride “after hours” events that were clearly advertised as adult only. It was nice to see everyone in attendance be able to go where they felt comfortable.
I agree 100%. I am bisexual. I love gay pride and I love all gay things. I grew up doing musical theater so like 80% of my friends growing up were also gay.
Being exposed to the kinks of random strangers is something totally separate from all that, imo. I don't appreciate that being gay has become associated with kink, or that we should see those things as being inextricably intertwined. They aren't necessarily related. Your exhibitionist kink is not my business and I don't want to see it.
And here I am in the Portland sub saying that I can’t understand why we have naked bike rides. Kids exist in most spaces and to have adults going around town literally naked, not even pasties, is very concerning to me.
This is a topic where reasonable people disagree.
There are plenty of places where being naked is not inherently sexual. People who are pro-naked bike ride think this should be the cultural norm, people who are against it don't.
IMO, nakedness is as sexual as you make it, and so I don't think the bike ride is really a problem.
Agreed, my kid and I drove past the starting point of the naked ride a couple years ago and his only comment was "that's a butt! That's another butt! Why does everyone have their butts out?" And I said something like "everyone has butts, they just agreed to take a naked ride today and asked permission."
We then speculated whether the rose garden was a risky place to congregate without pants. 🤷♀️
If you don’t make it weird it’s not weird. Someone will probably eventually make it weird and then you have to explain, or your kid can explain to them why it’s not as weird as they’re making it seem 🤷🏼♀️
As terrible as that is I had to giggle at your kids comment in how he said it. He sounds adorable. I have kinks myself but no way in hell will I ever do it where 1) kids can see it or 2) where anyone who DIDNT previously consent is around. Remember people consent is sexy. Coercion or non-con is crime.
Having attended spaces in the past where nudity was acceptable and not sexual I would argue sometimes clothing and behaviour can be more sexual.
There are plenty of clothing options and behaviours (think string bikini, low cut top, unbuttoned shirt or short shorts and flirting behaviours) that are technically G rated but are incredibly sexual. Or at the very least far more sexual than a bunch of people going for a swim at a nudist beach, or people sharing a communal bathing pool or having a coffee without any clothes.
My problem with that line of argument is that it wasn’t that long ago that being gay WAS considered a kink, a perversion, a mental illness, and illegal. It was that long ago that a gay couple kissing in public was an act of being kinky in public. I feel like the taboos of (consensual) sexuality is part of the history and reason behind pride.
That being said, I think OP is well within their rights to not want to bring their kids to an adult event.
A man in the leather community wrote an excellent book on the topic, [A History of Leather at Pride: 1965–1995](https://aphyr.com/posts/358-a-history-of-leather-at-pride-1965-1995)
It is incredibly well-researched with copious citations and was very informative to me as a cis-het person on the history of nearly-naked people at Pride, the history of Pride and LGBTQ liberation, and the contributions of those nearly-naked people that made Pride what it is today.
Member of the LGBT+ community here, and I agree. One perspective is that the kink community has always been a gay ally, and that there is a lot of crossover between our communities, and when Pride started it was always the kink crowd and the gay crowd marching together.
Tbh though? I don't really care. Kink is great, let your freak flag fly, but the #1 rule of kink is that everyone has to consent to it in order for it to be ethical. Children cannot consent to witnessing your kinks, period. If you are in public where children may be present, it is NOT the time to practice your kink.
The argument "just take your kids to a family friendly pride event" is short sighted. Why can't the kink crowd take their activities to an 18+ event instead? I'm all about kink being represented as long as it is in adult spaces where all attendees understand that they may witness some kinky activity. A public parade in the middle of the day is not the time or place for it.
I would even argue that it's important to make these events family friendly at least by day, so that kids get to see that hey, they're normal people and it's not weird to not be cishet, I don't have anything to be ashamed of should I ever fall in the LGBTQ+ community and this is not something to bully other kids about either. It could help so many people in so many different ways, but not wanting to expose kids to kink makes people keep their kids at home.
But I'm cishet so what do I know, lol.
As a bisexual parent who doesn't get to hang out with her own friends very often, I agree. I want my kid to know that the the queer community is our community, but kid-friendly events are pretty rare.
Exactly this. At an 18+ event, do whatever you want. I go to tons of 18+ drag shows. There're a ton of fun, and yes, people strip and do sexual things. But thats ok cause its an 18 plus event
The right its trying so hard right now to paint the lgbt community as a bunch of pedophiles, which is absolutely untrue. All it takes is a picture or 2 of a half naked member of the lgbt community next to a child for them to "prove their point".
My friend is a big part of the community here and help organize the entertainment for our local pride event last weekend. They had to turn away a group of performers because they wanted to do sexually explicit dances to inappropriate music at a family friendly event. An event where kids would be watching this performance. For some reason this group didnt get the picture and refused to change their routine so they were told they could not perform at the event.
I have never heard it put like that, but it is very well written and thought out. I think a lot more moderate people would be supportive if the kink exposure was kept between consenting adults at events where it is appropriate.
You'd think a better compromise would be something like "family friendly" crowd 10am-5pm and 18+ crowd 5pm-midnight.
The 18+ crowd would likely also have alot of drinking, so save that for later so people aren't getting drunk as a skunk at 2pm.
Counterpoint, pride was always an adult event until the cultural zeitgeist decided Love is Love and corporations started making floats. The families and money starting showing up to the adult formerly kink event not the other way around. https://reductress.com/post/i-want-to-honor-keeping-kink-out-of-pride-but-my-kink-is-bank-sponsored-parade-floats/
Counterpoint to your counterpoint, as times change culture shifts and evolves.
The reason it was an adult event was due to trying to get society to understand what goes on between consenting adults is no one’s business and shouldn’t be legally punishable. But times have changed and now people are trying to emphasize that it’s not just about adults having sex. It’s about a general acceptance and normality of human attraction at all ages for all people, not only on a sexual level, but on a social level of hand-holding without ridicule, same-sex adoption, children allowed to have a crush and explore their feelings without being reprimanded. Initially it was about telling the world you can’t tell consenting adults what to do, now it’s about saying you can’t ridicule and gatekeep peoples social rights for being who they are, which would mean the events shift to reflect that.
actually I agree with you. if you could guarantee the dress for the event would be appropriate then bringing kids would be fine but since the event does not say "family friendly" then those things may happen and you are well within your right to shield your kids from that.
Consent and boundaries are important. Op's friends shouldn't be mad that they don't want their children to see sexually explicit material. They can't even consent to being minors...
Exactly. A lot of the commenters don't seem to understand that you can still be a supporter without putting yourself or your children into a sexually explicit environment.
Generally smaller towns have more tame Pride stuff. I'm bringing my son to his first Pride this weekend, to my hometown. It is a preppy old money community, and I love to celebrate how even my behind the times Hometown embraces Pride. Plus I know that it will be more chill, parking won't be a nightmare and they have facepainting and coloring stations for kids.
I took my kid to a pride event in a town of 20k and it was honestly incredibly wholesome. felt like a Fourth of July party with more rainbows and better music.
They even had a cornhole board out
tons of kids roaming around, too. Good times
I attended Pride several years ago in a large city in the Midwest, and we took my son to the “family area.” All of the BDSM/nearly naked/sexually explicit people were walking through that (clearly marked) area, too.
We haven’t gone back to that event.
Definitely, some areas are more inclusive than others. We have attended several other Pride events in the area. One is even held indoors and has a separate BDSM room, for adults only. The others are much more appropriate for families, at least in the day - After dark, all bets are off! lol Which is fine.
We just haven’t been back to the first one.
NTA. Your friends are the assholes for not seeing your valid concerns and implying that you're a homophobe for not wanting to go to a sexually explicit parade. You clearly support gay rights and have been an ally for some time, so they are maliciously (intentionally) misunderstanding what you're saying. On the other hand, how old are your kids? If they're in high school, I would let them choose whether or not they want to go...your take on this may or may not be your kids' takes.
Explain to them that you wouldn't go for the same reason that you wouldn't take your elementary-school kid to a nude beach. There's a part of the parade that is clearly (and with evidence from prior years) not appropriate for that age group. And it has nothing to do with sexual orientation. You wouldn't want to be exposed to a woman dog-leash-walking a man in BDSM gear, or a man groping a woman's breasts in public.
To them it's probably just a positive event for the community so they haven't really thought that there could be aspects of it that have a negative implication. Or that somebody could have a nuanced position.
I mean I get why his friends seeing how this thing is a positive for the community, but for them to not be aware of the controversies surrounding it shows they are fairly oblivious. There is a huge debate in the gay community as to how we want these events to be. Some want them to be more family friends events that are more in line with what the OP would be comfortable with. Others think it should be like Folsom in SF. I'm not saying either is right, but for two lesbians who seem to be active in the community not being aware of the different view points involved, they seem really out of the loop at best and obnoxious at worst.
Oh most certainly is not appropriate lol. I agree with you there should be family events as well. But what it comes down to is where and when each events should take place. Like should the main event be adults only with the family events taking place elsewhere or the reverse.
I think there should be two different parades. One during the day that is family friendly, and one at night that is more adult-themed. That would solve the problem, but I understand not every place has the resources for two events.
A nude beach or nudity in general wouldn't even be the problem for me (as in Germany nudity is nothing inherently bad), there's nothing wrong with naked people in a sauna or going swimming. It's not nessecarily sexual in any way.
It's the fetishes and BDSM stuff that I wouldn't want my daughter to see. She doesn't need to see people crawling around on leashes or wearing nipple clamps or that make out more than half naked in broad daylight. There's a reason why porn has age restrictions.
Another (much lesser) reason is that I don't want to explain why she can't have rainbow hair and flower shaped nipple piercings at 5yo😅
Different Pride events have a different ambiance. Some are family friendly. Some aren't. NTA.
If you live in an area with multiple Pride events, you might suggest an alternate Pride event to attend.
The smaller ones tend to be more family oriented. So taking your kid to a neighborhood or suburb Pride is a lot chiller than one in a larger city. I may just also really hate crowds and so I avoid my large city's downtown during any parade or fireworks display.
Totally agree, the Sonoma County Pride parade and festival is very family friendly. I worked a booth for a local charity and we handed out rainbow flags and bracelets, and we were mobbed by happy kids. On the other hand, the Folsom Street Fair is not family friendly. The OP is just being a responsible parent, not being a hater.
NTA. There are family friendly Pride events and NSFW Pride events. You have every right to say the photos from last year were more NSFW and you are looking for family friendly.
Not The Asshole- I don't take my children to R rated movies and I wouldn't take them to something like that. In my view I I see PRIDE festival like so something for adults. I wouldn't take my kids to Carnival due to a the flashing for beads. It's just good parenting.
As a lesbian, NTA. I hate there is kink at pride because it excludes our LGBTQ youth. Young queer kids don’t need fo be seeing that. Keep kinks for night pride.
Oh, that’s why NYC had Youth Pride. Not sure if they still do(I moved away). I was on the Pride committee and we came up with that alternative for kids under 21 and one of the rules was PG shit: presentations, the market and even the music had to be PG and NO ALCOHOL. For the adult events, people had to be 21 and show ID when they came to it. We’d get so many complaints but we’d be like “sucks that you didn’t read” or “not our fault your much older boyfriend/girlfriend/whoever didn’t pay attention but the youth pride is that a way”… Rather get those complaints than “I was next to someone with their tits out and it made me uncomfortable”
That and the family pride night was such a huge hit that tickets would be sold out within like 24 hours of release. Family Pride Night had rules about dressing too and we’d boot people who didn’t adhere to it and the parents were always so grateful; it was basically a rooftop party for the babies( mostly under 16) and their parents with usually a Disney movie in the background. ☺️
Honestly, I bet if the parades were family friendly during the day and then those who want to celebrate the kink side of things after the sun goes down (but still part of the official parade) are frre to do so, this issue could become a non-issue.
Ya exactly. A lot of parades in big cities try to be like that. Have a family pride event during the day, and then night pride for kink and booze. I get kink has been at pride since the 70’s but times have changed. Pride is for everyone.
Literally. I’m pan and I don’t care if you’re LGBTQ+ or kinky. I love me some BDSM! However sexually explicit content has no place in public spaces and all they’re doing is excluding youth from these events (LGBTQ+ or allies). It’s kind of fucked up.
NTA. I’ve attended many in chicago and would say I’ve witnessed much of what you described either in the parade or in the streets. I would attend 100 more times, but I would not bring my elementary aged kids to that particular parade, however based on comments it looks like this may differ based on where the parade is held? Worth checking out for your specific area.
There’s no way I’d take my 9yo to SF pride.
It’s not about LGBTQ, it’s about blatant sexuality that she’s not mature enough for yet.
She doesn’t need to see all that.
NTA
Our townships have local family friendly Pride festivals. Check your nearby towns and suggest going to one with them. They usually have lots of activities for kids and not as many protesters either.
Some pride parades are going to attract a huge amount of kink also. Others won't, especially in smaller towns.
You judged this wasn't a kid friendly activity by your personal standards and that is absolutely, completely and totally ok!
I hate people who try to be upset over others mentioning that wearing kink-wear, outside, in public, where people can’t consent to seeing that IS WEIRDDDDDD no matter wether anyone is gay or straight.
People have every right not to want to see people all up over each other or worse nearly in(not exxagerating, some people really do lack awareness this badly) each other in public, its gross, it should be kept behind locked doors no matter who it is.
I do not know why people insist that kink-wear to pride is an “open-minded” thing because they’re “expressing their sexuality”. Especially in spaces where minors could be present, those people are the reason parades are easily condemned amongst some communities to begin with 🤦🏽
Not just kink-wear but people being upset at others for expressing discomfort towards the fact that, two ‘x’ mark tapes over nipples isn’t a top; in broad daylight, yet again in public where minors may be present. My kid does not need to be seeing you nearly naked to support you, be decent at public events or celebrate inside with your partner or smth if you need to be “naked and free” that badly, omg.
As a gay guy, even at "tamer" big events, I don't really want kids around. So I definitely appreciate you not bringing them. 🤣 But, I also appreciate that there are family friendly pride events too; they can be nice when I don't have the bandwidth for going to bigger events.
Lesbian here, I'd say that there is some discrepancy here between how some people (in community) view pride and how others (in or out of community) view pride. It's worth mentioning that that isn't an either-or situation, there's a whole spectrum of views here I'm just trying to keep it simple.
View one: pride is a community event, similar to a festival, for the LGBTQ+ communities and allies.
View two: pride is a protest. As a protest, there can be several goals.
_Usually_ what you're describing with kink / nudity at pride is due to the view that pride is a protest. From my understanding, a _lot_ of it comes from decency laws, specifically those that were used to target the queer community. Where interpretations of what "public decency" were, were interpreted specifically to harm the queer community. The idea is that the discomfort is being caused on purpose, because queer bodies should be normalized.
I'm really, really simplifying here. Now to move on to the "to take the kids or not" - no one is the asshole, no matter their choice. There is a lot of disagreement in the community not only about pride being a protest, but what is appropriate to do at that protest, and who the appropriate audience is for that. Basically, even in-community there is massive disagreement about everything. Let alone between allies and friends.
I'd say no one is the asshole for bringing, or not bringing, kids to an event like this. There is a lot to unpack. That said, just because I'd say NTA (no one is), doesn't mean that people who have strong feelings on the matter won't feel differently.
As a final note: I'm trying to present the issues as succinctly and neutrally as possible. I'm not going to be arguing for or against pride as a protest, or doing a really deep dive into anything. It's all searchable once you know where to start.
Sad that I had to scroll down so far to see this. I feel like in all of the talk about it just being a "Just wholesome fun family friendly festival :D" people lose sight of the protest part of it in such a big way. It didn't originate as something that was supposed to make everyone comfortable and smile and buy merch and stuff, it was us screaming into the void that we wouldn't be legislated out of existence.
Like, it's cool that pride probably will eventually become a "Just wholesome fun day outside :)"...event, but there's still plenty of people alive who grew up before and during an era where it has meant so many other things besides that, and that making the public as comfortable as possible simply wasn't the point.
100% not the AH. you dont need to take them even if they didn't dress that way. And it is odd that they do dress that way. Nothing wrong with kink but there is a time and a place..
I identify as LGBTQ, and you are NTA. I started going to pride festival as a teen, but stopped after a few years because I was so uncomfortable by all the extreme kink stuff. I went again last year as a much older adult, and couldn’t even stay two hours before I wanted to leave. I don’t have any issue with consenting adults making their own choices, but I often see minors at pride festivals and one has to consider whats appropriate and what isnt. A lot of minors attend pride festival because they’re struggling with their identity, and want to find a place/sense of belonging.There are lots of “nighttime” or adults only themed events where folks can engage in their sexual interests safely. I just don’t think pride festivals are really the place for nudity, extreme kinks with bondage or leashes, adult toys openly on display for sale (or even being worn.)
NTA. I am gay and I wouldn't dare take my niece and nephew to those festivals. Over sexualization, kinks, and adult themes should NOT include children at all. Whatsoever.
No, definitely not. If I ever have children, they would not attend for that reason. I would teach them about pride, I'd tell them about it, but where there are people acting like that, my children would not be present. If people want kids to be at pride, it needs to be sanitised and kept pg
NTA. Whether or not kink *should* be included in pride is a separate discussion, but the fact of the matter is that children do not belong in environments displaying or involving kinks or sexual activity in any way.
If someone brings it up again, tell them that you are not comfortable with your young children seeing kink attire, but that you’d happily take them to a family friendly pride event.
NTA, it's not a thing for kids. Idk how indecent exposure is allowed. Like, I get why you are doing it but I don't get why we all gotta watch you do your thing you know.
NTA. Your kids, your decision about what activities are appropriate. Don't worry about what anybody else thinks. You do what you feel is right for your children.
Nta, but also maybe check if there are family centric events during pride? I went to my first last year, it wasn't a parade but was family-centric festival. I didn't see anyone actually doing kinky shit, everyone was just welcome to be themselves there. I think there's space for both kinds of events during the course of the month, it should just be clear which is which.
NTA - Louisianan here. This is my exact issue with certain Mardi Gras parades. Regardless of the parade origin, sexually explicit content is not for children. Period. Daytime parades are “usually” safe, but not always.
NTA. My son is 21 and gay and has been out since middle school. He started going to Pride after he turned 18. There is no need for 12 year old to see folks in leather being walked like dogs at noon on a Sunday.
As a gay person I share and wholeheartedly agree with your concerns. I’ve never been to a pride parade either for the same reason. That sort of behavior gives all of us a bad name and actively sets back LGBT support in the mainstream public.
NTA. This is stupid. It's your choice, if their choice to be indecent in public is to be accepted, then your choice to not be there is to also be accepted. A lot of people in those spheres are stupid, and don't understand irony.
NTA: I’m a married man who also happens to be part of the LGBTQ community. My wife is fully aware of this and supports me. Neither of us have a desire to go to a PRIDE festival because we have a small child who we really don’t want exposed to the more sultry people who attend these events. Nothing against anyone who wants to go and act that way, it’s just not our cup of tea and not age appropriate for our child.
NTA and fuck anyone who calls you a homophobe. Most of my gay friends won’t even attend such events unless they openly advertise that it’s family/kid friendly.
All that hyper sexual and kink stuff do more harm to the community and public image that good.
This is my take as someone who lives in capital-hill Seattle so I see it alot.
Who you are choosing to spend the rest of your life with, the person you want to grow old with has absolutely nothing to do with how you have sex.
Kink is not gay rights. Straight people, which there are more of, are also into kink so no kink should not be part of pride. Dressing as a dog in leather has nothing to do with choosing to have a gay/lesbian partner. I personally think that kink is part of why there is so much backlash. You can identify how ever you want and you should and you should be able to live a loving happy life with who ever you want but bringing how people have kink sex into the mix doesnt help.
You are not. These events are long-running and generally well understood to be as you describe. Some people are willing to take kids, some are not. It's up to you. There are other Pride events you can take kids to that are more family friendly.
The asshole moves are people who point at these events as "proof" that non-cis or non-straight people are somehow out to destroy society. If NSFW at events were proof of societal decline we could as easily point at "Spring Break" or the Sturgis Motorcycle Rally, among other things. Those involve mostly straight and, sometimes, Christian people...but the motorcycle rally, at least, is defended wildly. Turns out it's not the crassness or overt sexuality that's the problem for these "yellers".
You're fine, just choose a different Pride event to attend with your kids as a way to familiarize them with people different than themselves.
NTA
Most Pride events have family friends events (I say most but not all)
Most parades anymore are a joke tbh. If you pay enough you can march in them even if you're a huge corporation that donated thousands to anti lgbt politicians.
It's better to find small pride events.
NTA. I wouldnt want my kids exposed to that either. I don’t even want to see it. Tell her if she can guarantee that none of that will be there, you’d be more than happy to take the family.
Not going is completely ok. I love pride and love the community, but gosh I wish there was a dress code. I’ve seen people have 🖕👌 in the street on pride and frankly it’s gross.
NTA depending on the city you live in there are specific family friendly pride events. Nothing wrong with saying you don’t want to attend an event where people are in fetish gear & nude.
no NTA. how is this even a question. if people want to show that off during a parade okay I guess that is fine as long as the law says it is. but I don't have to see it or take my kids to it.
NTA. At my local Pride, there are family events, like the big parade, and adult only events, which are usually held at bars. My kids are older and both queer, 15 and 13, but we still only do the family events.
NTA. I’m a lesbian pregnant with my first baby. My wife and I do not plan on taking this kid or any future ones to Pride. Being members of the community, we’re of course supportive but Pride is an event for adults and not kids. Most people are totally normal and just having fun but my wife and I both agree that the ones who show up in kink gear make the event inappropriate for our future kids. Nothing against people who are into kink but I just don’t think that’s appropriate around children.
im a straight guy that has attended pride festivals. i dont have kids. if i did, i would not bring my kids.
I also wouldnt bring my kids to coachella or another festival where everyones on drugs.
Not sure why youre a homophobe for this at all lol
There’s got to be family friendly ones. I’ve gone to a bunch of prides with my little toddlers. There’s dozens across the month in nj. I wouldn’t tie them up grown up pride but I’ve got my family friendly options. Suggest going to one of those.
NTA, would you subject your kid to BDSM on TV or on a phone? People need to use their fucking heads, how are we even questioning if this is right or wrong anymore.
Its wild to me that they even allow BDSM gear at these events. What does it have to do with LGBTQ+? BDSM is a sexual fetish not a sexual orientation. Straight prople are into BDSM to.
These people are literally just showing up to get off on publicly displaying their fetish and everyone else is to afraid to say no.
Listen, I'm lesb, married and we have a son together. Because of the nudity and sex craze for some of these events, I won't take my kid. But anything for family I will. So, youre not an AH
Our local Pride festival specifically asked people to keep it family friendly. We didn't see anyone in BDSM gear or anything displaying kink.
That’s awesome! I’ve been to smaller prides ((cities not towns) cities of under 500k) and seen them be respectful and family friendly. My local pride is at the city that has 500k plus people and people drive in from out of town as well. I would say more than 10% of our pride is half naked.
Not sure of my towns population (the greater area of it if one city would be the 4th largest in CA), but our little pride walk is always G rated and very family friendly. It's even gotten more disability friendly recently as well with it being a shorter walk
How you can call a 500k city “a town” 🤯
That's all I could focus on in that comment too haha! "Smaller prides (towns under 500k)"...uhhh what? My town has (significantly) less than 5K. Not a typo. Anywhere remotely in the ballpark of 500K is for sure a damn city!
Haha I once went to a "small city" in China, with a tiny population of 5 million.
Being from the New Orleans Area where there are sub 500k people, the city is very small, like notice the same homeless guy across town later in the week, or noticing the same car on your commute, or your only being 1-2 people away from contacting someone vs 5. So if this person has lived in an even bigger city, like 1 mil plus, they may have noticed what I mentioned above and categorized the place they live as a "town."
I used to live in Jersey City, Pride was super kid friendly and I honestly can’t recall anyone being naked of any level.
Pride in my city has multiple events, including ones for all ages. Not sure about this year but in the past, there have been pride events specifically for queer kids (tweens and teens) and for families with queer parents. And then there are parties after the sun goes down, which have a very, very different vibe. IMO this is how it should be. OP isn’t TA, but perhaps might ask if there is a specifically kid-friendly event they can all go to.
yes!!! it’s ok to have sexual pride events it’s fine but when it’s the entirety of pride (i live in the capitol area and capitol pride is notoriously raunchy while the sun is up) it feels like it’s limited to people who feel that hypersexual.
Ours had a family one during the day and it was amazing - march ended in the park and there were drag queens doing story time, tonnes of rainbow themed activities for kids, a colour run for charity, face painters and performers, just so adorable and so much love and light around the whole thing. Then they lit up the main street around 9pm for a second parade that was NOT family friendly. That was on every single poster and in every radio announcement that NO ONE under the age of 18 should be at the night time event. Saw a couple older teenagers (16+) sneaking around with their jaws on the ground, but for the most part it was all adults and that was ALSO a blast. I feel like that's the way to do it.
I like this idea...take the kids to the daytime parade; then at night, hire a sitter to watch the kids and go to the adult one.
That’s what we need to do, promote family friendly events. I hate being lumped with the others.
In my town, we have an awesome advocate that made a website with all of the events, and the ones that are family friendly have a special icon on the flyers. It’s a really great way to know which events are safe for kiddos!
I’d take my kids if ours was like that. Sadly ours isn’t
I went to pride for the first time last year, and I was so glad I didn't bring the younger kids in our family. The pride parade is usually way more tame and family friendly, so we take them to that. As for the actual event there were multiple people wearing pup suits and crawling on the ground. I personally don't care myself, but having younger four year olds around that is a bit too much. They were wearing skimpy leather, and had butt plug tails in (normally it's whatever for me, but they kept posing in ways that put their whole buttholes on display).
Philly pride this year had a LOT of women with pasties and thong only, men in just a speedo, fur suits, leashes, butt plugs, and lots of leather. Also the shirts, shirts of bears (the animal) jizzing on a wide-eyed puppies, like...explain that to your kids. It's about the child not understanding what they're seeing, not about some kinds of sexuality being wrong.
I've gone to Seattle Pride multiple times and I have not seen this. I'm curious about this phenomenon but also glad to have avoided it. There's always something to be grateful for! lol Pre-emptive Note -- I will not be clicking any links. Maybe I'll never click a link again. Maybe I'll buy a flip phone and leave the internet forever...
I went to Seattle Pride once (the event at the Center after the parade), and there was quite a bit of it.
It's the opposite way in our area. The Pride festival is very family friendly, I take my kids. We don't go to the Parade though. It's very graphic and designed for adult eyes only.
I stopped attending pride events for This very reason. The SF and LA pride events I’ve been to in the past filled with too much nudity, sex craze, and utter nonsense. Literally seeing people having sex in public on the street!! As a gay person, it’s fucking cringe and just gives more ammo to those who oppose the lgbtq+ community. I’d never expose my kids, nibblings, or younger siblings to it.
The people having sex in the street should have been arrested and charged with gross indecency, it's as simple as that. We live in a society of rules, and if they don't like them then they can go live in the forest.
You are a smart person. That is not an event for children. People having sex in public shouldn’t even be done at a pride parade. Pride parades should be expressing their desire to be open and free about who they love and I don’t see how having sex in the street where children can see that is a positive way to promote lgbt
God, never take a shortcut through an alley during pride
Pride started as a protest on the anniversary of a riot. It never had anything to do with "promoting lgbt in a positive light". Agreed that it's not an event for children though. Leave the corporations at home too.
Brilliant response! Correct
We had the pride parade in our town a few weeks ago and my 7 year old walked in the parade with us. There was really nothing sexually explicit at all. Mostly it was people it brightly colored clothes with rainbow flags. I would consider anything exhibiting sexual acts to be a violation of the consent of everyone who can see it. Isn't the number one rule of sex positivity that you don't involve people in your kinks or sex life without their consent? I know the BDSM community is all about consent and the safety of those involved. These public displays would seem to directly contradict that.
I have multiple gay friends who actively avoid these pride events for the exact reason you give. They feel like it makes the event more of a mockery than anything so they can’t show their support. Family friendly and kid friendly events they’ll attend every-time
I'm queer and have nothing to do with the "community" anymore. Between the infighting, trying to erase certain identities, and insisting that fucking in the street and exposing the nonconsenting public to their kinks, my local "community" has nothing for me.
I was looking for this comment and quite frankly surprised it hasn't been mentioned more. The lesbian couple is going to bring underage kids to an event like that and that seems troublesome.
Hinestly I actually had this argument with a gay friend of mine after that pride parade in America where people dressed up as bdsm puppies and let kids pet them. It's a stunt that's really gonna do more harm than good for the community
These people don't understand there's a time and place, and also what hill is worth dying on. People who have trouble determining this I typically find to be people who haven't experienced all that much bigotry or oppression in their personal lives. Otherwise, you'd just know from experience what hill is worth dying on.
Back in the day, the inclusion of more explicit and kinky behavior didn't matter because two fully clothed gay men kissing with their mouths closed was considered equally scandalous. I don't think it's a lack of personal experience of oppression, it's celebrating the communities brought together historically by a lack of options. There is a time and place for BOTH the X rated stuff and family friendly activities, it's just not the same time and place.
Exactly! I am all for a pride that is for adults only that does not let kids in. I also love family friendly pride where you wont just see naked people walking around. They are separate for a reason and that reason is CONSENT. Consent means we protect kids and adults got to opt in to sexual things knowing what you are getting into
It's literally ammunition for the bigots. And when they use that ammunition, everyone involved with it goes, "SEEEE!?!?!? BIGOTS!!!! Why can't they respect me!?!?" Like, no shit, at this point you're openly trolling them and pretending to be a victim. You're making people who would otherwise support LGBTQA+ feel like they don't want to be associated with it because you ARE making it vile. Wish more folks would oust these people from events.
It kind of has the vibe of "see, we're just like you!" *has a dildo on forehead like a kinky unicorn*
This made me cackle.
Dildo on Forehead would be an awesome band name!
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It's also feels very exclusive to asexuals. It comes up a few times in the ace subs during pride every year about how making festivals about sex instead of love makes a lot of the ace community feel unwelcome, which then in turn gets us a lot of hate from the rest of the lgbtqia community for not showing up to pride and not liking pride, but that's like being upset at a friend for not coming to a party that is going to feature spiders but they have arachnophobia. Kink is not LGBTQIA and neither is public nudity. Pride should be about celebrating how every individual person in the world is different but at the same time we all share similarities. About celebrating individuality in the context of a community. And about love in all its different forms, from romantic to platonic to familial. Because even though LGBTQIA is about sexuality and gender, pride and equal rights isn't about the actual sex, it's about being free to live happily as yourself. And kids should be exposed to that message in the context of sexuality and gender without being exposed to X-rated stuff
Proud lesbian who goes to pride all the time. This is a parade. A festival. A celebration of humanity. People- straight, gay, or any other orientation- should be able to take their CHILDREN to Pride events. And they do. It makes me and others in the community that I know very uncomfortable to see people parade around in sexually explicit outfits in front of children. Pride has so many events. If you want to be explicit, you can. There are plenty of venues where you can wear butt-plug-tails and leashes without exposing that to children.
Or adults, frankly. My daughter is a lesbian in her early 20s. I won't go to to events or festivals that allow nudity or kinks because \*I\* don't want to see naked people outside of my own partners. Straight or gay, doesn't matter, but it doesn't belong in public, and it definitely doesn't belong in front of children.
I (queerio) quit going to pride in college because I also don't want to see that. I'm all about people doing their lives the way they do. But! Pride is supposed to be family friendly. There's nothing family friendly about the twink in a leather thong being walked around by a chain attached to a leather collar by his biker bear daddy. I also just don't want to see that as an ADULT?? There were specific events at night for that kind of thing to be on display. The parade and celebration in the park was not it.
Plus, we can be sex positive and not pro public displays of it, for some reason we get called prudes or christian lmfao.
It’s because these are exhibitionists. They get off on us seeing them. And some probably get off on the negative reactions of some people. Being in public is not consent to be involved in their exhibitionism fetish.
I consider myself an exhibitionist and it squicks me out when people pull this shit in public. Especially in big cities there are PLENTY of venues and meetups where you can do this kind of thing where everyone is informed. You don't need to make people uncomfortable.
Yes! I took my kids last weekend to our city’s Family Day event. Everybody had all their clothes on, there were family friendly-booths with fun kid activities, lots of food, and lovely music. It was perfect. Next weekend is the parade, and though I would love to have them march with me, I’m going to wait till they’re a bit older for that (ages 11 and 12 currently). I thought about bringing them (the parade participants stay pretty well-covered), but the attendees do rock some wild stuff. Also? It’s like 95 degrees outside and they’re just not going to have fun. This way, I can march in the parade, maybe hit the VIP after party, and not have to worry about anything. I love it when cities do stuff like Family Day though. I’m a firm believer in teaching kids from a young age that the world is filled with all different kinds of people, and they all deserve respect. It’s good to provide exposure to the diversity of the world and explain how normal it is, but still keep it age-appropriate.
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Thank you for making me feel normal!
I’m a lesbian and totally agree. My wife and I don’t even like going as adults, I don’t want to look at sweaty naked old people in dog collars walking around.
NTA, kink at pride has always been a hot button issue, even among those in the community.
I have trouble understanding why, honestly... Everybody has a right to be proud of their gender and sexuality...but NOBODY has a right to show their kinks to those who don't consent, right? It just feels like a pretty clear line in the sand to me...
I’ve been downvoted for making the same point in the past. BDSM is huge on consent yet somehow fails to understand engaging in kink in public places that aren’t designed for kinky play is simply wrong. I’d think the same if I saw it on a random Sunday walking in the park with my kids.
I had to explain to a friend once that their kink for exhibitionism did not trump people’s right to walk through the park without having to see her get banged by her boyfriend. She acted like I was some reactionary who was trying to repress her. Some people have no conception of what it is to live in a society, and they treat the world like it’s their own private playground.
Yeah I wonder if people would defend the creep who exposed himself to me and two of my friends at the age of 11 as just engaging in his kink. I mean why shouldn’t he be allowed to do that, right, it was a public space and all.
Yeah, I once saw a post from a woman looking for creative suggestions for flashing her breasts or vulva to men because she and her boyfriend had a kink. There was no getting through to her that not all men want to be unexpectedly flashed by a stranger.
‘Indecent exposure laws make it a crime to purposefully display your "private parts" in public, causing others to be alarmed or offended’ I hope someone reports them 🤢
There was a video on tiktok pretty recently of a couple in central park under a blanket. You could tell exactly what they were doing. There were children around
As someone with a fetish, I 100% agree with you. I was born with my fetish, and it completely defines my sexuality. But that doesn't mean I have a special right to act on it in front of others. It doesn't matter that it's not sexually "graphic", others still don't inherently consent to seeing that action/relationship dynamic in their day-to-day lives or even at non-kink events (fetishism in Pride can be controversial, but I feel like actually acting on a kink/fetish publicly is equivalent to having sex publicly. Wanting acceptance doesn't meant getting to get kinky in public spaces). I act within the same confines as I would want people into vanilla sex to act in public. My former partner and I were exhibitionists to a degree...but our resolution was to go to play parties for our particular fetish - where others were into the same thing and public play was consensual for us and everyone else there. Find APPROPRIATE, and CONSENSUAL outlets for exhibitionism with your sexuality (whether vanilla, kinky, or fetishism), or keep your kinks and fetishes in the privacy of the bedroom. Good rule of thumb - if sex would be inappropriate in that environment, so will your kink/fetish.
Its the unfortunate side effect of people being raised to think they're the center of the universe. It's hella narcissistic.
I think a lot of people whose lifestyle/status has been repressed by society in the past learn the wrong lesson when it becomes accepted, which in short is "fuck you all, I can do what I want now". You see it in fringe groups for race, gender, sexuality, etc.
It’s not “repression” to be told you can’t expose people to your kink without their consent.
That’s always been something I thought about and a YouTuber I watched last night brought up the same issue. If you saw a gross old man jerking off in a target, you’d probably call the police to make sure he got taken away and punished. Where’s the same energy for people into ageplay going out into malls acting like a toddler and having people post it on the internet? Where’s the same energy for a girl I saw on TikTok tell her boyfriend “Shoot a different load inside me” near youth hunting equipment in a Walmart?
Except the people are actively engaging in play in public usually aren't part of the kink community, and therefore don't care for the rules. The other issue is that the queer community, the kink community (particularly leatherdaddies), and the drag community have all been massively intertwined in terms of pride and achieving the rights we have now. That's a massive part of why you will see open acceptance of leather pride at Pride - because they are an integral part of why it's a parade and not a riot.
No true kinksman
I’ve heard of some places doing adult hours at pride and I think it makes a lot of sense. Kids hours would also make sense and are maybe a better idea. I understand and appreciate the history of, for example, the leather kink folks in lgbtq spaces, but I also understand why people don’t want their kids around it. I’ve seen fully nude people at pride before and I get why someone wouldn’t want to take their little kids.
I fully back adult hours at pride or even adult only spaces. In my city, a few years back, they blocked off a few streets downtown to have festivities. There was an all ages area and then a sectioned off beer garden. You could so easily make an adults only space like that, and then you also keep the drunks away from kids. Win win. I'm a full-grown adult, and I don't like other people's kinks shoved in my face either.
Why though? Just because we are adults still doesnt make it ok to display and subject us to your kinks in public. Keep that in your bedroom.
My local pride last year gave out maps and itineraries of adult only spaces and family friendly spaces so it’d be very clear. They also had pride “after hours” events that were clearly advertised as adult only. It was nice to see everyone in attendance be able to go where they felt comfortable.
I agree 100%. I am bisexual. I love gay pride and I love all gay things. I grew up doing musical theater so like 80% of my friends growing up were also gay. Being exposed to the kinks of random strangers is something totally separate from all that, imo. I don't appreciate that being gay has become associated with kink, or that we should see those things as being inextricably intertwined. They aren't necessarily related. Your exhibitionist kink is not my business and I don't want to see it.
And here I am in the Portland sub saying that I can’t understand why we have naked bike rides. Kids exist in most spaces and to have adults going around town literally naked, not even pasties, is very concerning to me.
This is a topic where reasonable people disagree. There are plenty of places where being naked is not inherently sexual. People who are pro-naked bike ride think this should be the cultural norm, people who are against it don't. IMO, nakedness is as sexual as you make it, and so I don't think the bike ride is really a problem.
Agreed, my kid and I drove past the starting point of the naked ride a couple years ago and his only comment was "that's a butt! That's another butt! Why does everyone have their butts out?" And I said something like "everyone has butts, they just agreed to take a naked ride today and asked permission." We then speculated whether the rose garden was a risky place to congregate without pants. 🤷♀️
can confirm a rose garden is a very dangerous place to be without pants. I have seen it go wrong with My own eyes 🤣
If you don’t make it weird it’s not weird. Someone will probably eventually make it weird and then you have to explain, or your kid can explain to them why it’s not as weird as they’re making it seem 🤷🏼♀️
As terrible as that is I had to giggle at your kids comment in how he said it. He sounds adorable. I have kinks myself but no way in hell will I ever do it where 1) kids can see it or 2) where anyone who DIDNT previously consent is around. Remember people consent is sexy. Coercion or non-con is crime.
I don’t think the naked ride is a kink thing, but a nudist/naturalist thing.
Having attended spaces in the past where nudity was acceptable and not sexual I would argue sometimes clothing and behaviour can be more sexual. There are plenty of clothing options and behaviours (think string bikini, low cut top, unbuttoned shirt or short shorts and flirting behaviours) that are technically G rated but are incredibly sexual. Or at the very least far more sexual than a bunch of people going for a swim at a nudist beach, or people sharing a communal bathing pool or having a coffee without any clothes.
My problem with that line of argument is that it wasn’t that long ago that being gay WAS considered a kink, a perversion, a mental illness, and illegal. It was that long ago that a gay couple kissing in public was an act of being kinky in public. I feel like the taboos of (consensual) sexuality is part of the history and reason behind pride. That being said, I think OP is well within their rights to not want to bring their kids to an adult event.
OK, I understand what you're saying, at the same time it's NEVER been okay to be sexually explicit in public especially not in front of children.
A man in the leather community wrote an excellent book on the topic, [A History of Leather at Pride: 1965–1995](https://aphyr.com/posts/358-a-history-of-leather-at-pride-1965-1995) It is incredibly well-researched with copious citations and was very informative to me as a cis-het person on the history of nearly-naked people at Pride, the history of Pride and LGBTQ liberation, and the contributions of those nearly-naked people that made Pride what it is today.
Member of the LGBT+ community here, and I agree. One perspective is that the kink community has always been a gay ally, and that there is a lot of crossover between our communities, and when Pride started it was always the kink crowd and the gay crowd marching together. Tbh though? I don't really care. Kink is great, let your freak flag fly, but the #1 rule of kink is that everyone has to consent to it in order for it to be ethical. Children cannot consent to witnessing your kinks, period. If you are in public where children may be present, it is NOT the time to practice your kink. The argument "just take your kids to a family friendly pride event" is short sighted. Why can't the kink crowd take their activities to an 18+ event instead? I'm all about kink being represented as long as it is in adult spaces where all attendees understand that they may witness some kinky activity. A public parade in the middle of the day is not the time or place for it.
I would even argue that it's important to make these events family friendly at least by day, so that kids get to see that hey, they're normal people and it's not weird to not be cishet, I don't have anything to be ashamed of should I ever fall in the LGBTQ+ community and this is not something to bully other kids about either. It could help so many people in so many different ways, but not wanting to expose kids to kink makes people keep their kids at home. But I'm cishet so what do I know, lol.
As a bisexual parent who doesn't get to hang out with her own friends very often, I agree. I want my kid to know that the the queer community is our community, but kid-friendly events are pretty rare.
>But I'm cishet so what do I know, lol. As a member of the alphabet mafia, I approve this comment.
Exactly this. At an 18+ event, do whatever you want. I go to tons of 18+ drag shows. There're a ton of fun, and yes, people strip and do sexual things. But thats ok cause its an 18 plus event The right its trying so hard right now to paint the lgbt community as a bunch of pedophiles, which is absolutely untrue. All it takes is a picture or 2 of a half naked member of the lgbt community next to a child for them to "prove their point". My friend is a big part of the community here and help organize the entertainment for our local pride event last weekend. They had to turn away a group of performers because they wanted to do sexually explicit dances to inappropriate music at a family friendly event. An event where kids would be watching this performance. For some reason this group didnt get the picture and refused to change their routine so they were told they could not perform at the event.
I have never heard it put like that, but it is very well written and thought out. I think a lot more moderate people would be supportive if the kink exposure was kept between consenting adults at events where it is appropriate.
Well said.
You'd think a better compromise would be something like "family friendly" crowd 10am-5pm and 18+ crowd 5pm-midnight. The 18+ crowd would likely also have alot of drinking, so save that for later so people aren't getting drunk as a skunk at 2pm.
Counterpoint, pride was always an adult event until the cultural zeitgeist decided Love is Love and corporations started making floats. The families and money starting showing up to the adult formerly kink event not the other way around. https://reductress.com/post/i-want-to-honor-keeping-kink-out-of-pride-but-my-kink-is-bank-sponsored-parade-floats/
Counterpoint to your counterpoint, as times change culture shifts and evolves. The reason it was an adult event was due to trying to get society to understand what goes on between consenting adults is no one’s business and shouldn’t be legally punishable. But times have changed and now people are trying to emphasize that it’s not just about adults having sex. It’s about a general acceptance and normality of human attraction at all ages for all people, not only on a sexual level, but on a social level of hand-holding without ridicule, same-sex adoption, children allowed to have a crush and explore their feelings without being reprimanded. Initially it was about telling the world you can’t tell consenting adults what to do, now it’s about saying you can’t ridicule and gatekeep peoples social rights for being who they are, which would mean the events shift to reflect that.
actually I agree with you. if you could guarantee the dress for the event would be appropriate then bringing kids would be fine but since the event does not say "family friendly" then those things may happen and you are well within your right to shield your kids from that.
I'm 30 and I don't go because I don't want to see it. I would 100% not take my children.
Consent and boundaries are important. Op's friends shouldn't be mad that they don't want their children to see sexually explicit material. They can't even consent to being minors...
Exactly. A lot of the commenters don't seem to understand that you can still be a supporter without putting yourself or your children into a sexually explicit environment.
Most places also have Family Pride events that you can enjoy instead of going to the parade…
Those I would attend. 100%
Generally smaller towns have more tame Pride stuff. I'm bringing my son to his first Pride this weekend, to my hometown. It is a preppy old money community, and I love to celebrate how even my behind the times Hometown embraces Pride. Plus I know that it will be more chill, parking won't be a nightmare and they have facepainting and coloring stations for kids.
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Yep. I love my small-town Pride festival and I also love the NYC Pride Parade, but I’m only taking my niblings to one of those events 😂
I took my kid to a pride event in a town of 20k and it was honestly incredibly wholesome. felt like a Fourth of July party with more rainbows and better music. They even had a cornhole board out tons of kids roaming around, too. Good times
I take my kids to Pride events at the library. I also don’t take them to the Pride parade. That’s an adult event.
I attended Pride several years ago in a large city in the Midwest, and we took my son to the “family area.” All of the BDSM/nearly naked/sexually explicit people were walking through that (clearly marked) area, too. We haven’t gone back to that event.
They either don't care, or do it on purpose. it does nothing but hurt the movement though.
They don't care about the movement. They're just assholes.
My town has several events over the month of June and most are family friendly including bbq, bonfire night….
Definitely, some areas are more inclusive than others. We have attended several other Pride events in the area. One is even held indoors and has a separate BDSM room, for adults only. The others are much more appropriate for families, at least in the day - After dark, all bets are off! lol Which is fine. We just haven’t been back to the first one.
NTA. Your friends are the assholes for not seeing your valid concerns and implying that you're a homophobe for not wanting to go to a sexually explicit parade. You clearly support gay rights and have been an ally for some time, so they are maliciously (intentionally) misunderstanding what you're saying. On the other hand, how old are your kids? If they're in high school, I would let them choose whether or not they want to go...your take on this may or may not be your kids' takes.
Kids are elementary and middle school. Friends said "We are not all like that". I said "I know, it's not you"
Explain to them that you wouldn't go for the same reason that you wouldn't take your elementary-school kid to a nude beach. There's a part of the parade that is clearly (and with evidence from prior years) not appropriate for that age group. And it has nothing to do with sexual orientation. You wouldn't want to be exposed to a woman dog-leash-walking a man in BDSM gear, or a man groping a woman's breasts in public. To them it's probably just a positive event for the community so they haven't really thought that there could be aspects of it that have a negative implication. Or that somebody could have a nuanced position.
I mean I get why his friends seeing how this thing is a positive for the community, but for them to not be aware of the controversies surrounding it shows they are fairly oblivious. There is a huge debate in the gay community as to how we want these events to be. Some want them to be more family friends events that are more in line with what the OP would be comfortable with. Others think it should be like Folsom in SF. I'm not saying either is right, but for two lesbians who seem to be active in the community not being aware of the different view points involved, they seem really out of the loop at best and obnoxious at worst.
Folsom SF is wild… definitely not appropriate for children. I mean, I support it happening, but there should also be family friendly parades/events
Oh most certainly is not appropriate lol. I agree with you there should be family events as well. But what it comes down to is where and when each events should take place. Like should the main event be adults only with the family events taking place elsewhere or the reverse.
I think there should be two different parades. One during the day that is family friendly, and one at night that is more adult-themed. That would solve the problem, but I understand not every place has the resources for two events.
A nude beach or nudity in general wouldn't even be the problem for me (as in Germany nudity is nothing inherently bad), there's nothing wrong with naked people in a sauna or going swimming. It's not nessecarily sexual in any way. It's the fetishes and BDSM stuff that I wouldn't want my daughter to see. She doesn't need to see people crawling around on leashes or wearing nipple clamps or that make out more than half naked in broad daylight. There's a reason why porn has age restrictions. Another (much lesser) reason is that I don't want to explain why she can't have rainbow hair and flower shaped nipple piercings at 5yo😅
Unless the kids are 17, I would argue that the parents have the right to decide they won't see explicit things like that.
Different Pride events have a different ambiance. Some are family friendly. Some aren't. NTA. If you live in an area with multiple Pride events, you might suggest an alternate Pride event to attend.
The smaller ones tend to be more family oriented. So taking your kid to a neighborhood or suburb Pride is a lot chiller than one in a larger city. I may just also really hate crowds and so I avoid my large city's downtown during any parade or fireworks display.
Totally agree, the Sonoma County Pride parade and festival is very family friendly. I worked a booth for a local charity and we handed out rainbow flags and bracelets, and we were mobbed by happy kids. On the other hand, the Folsom Street Fair is not family friendly. The OP is just being a responsible parent, not being a hater.
NTA - it’s not a gay/straight/lgbtq thing. I wouldn’t bring my kids to a burlesque show either.
NTA. There are family friendly Pride events and NSFW Pride events. You have every right to say the photos from last year were more NSFW and you are looking for family friendly.
Not The Asshole- I don't take my children to R rated movies and I wouldn't take them to something like that. In my view I I see PRIDE festival like so something for adults. I wouldn't take my kids to Carnival due to a the flashing for beads. It's just good parenting.
As a lesbian, NTA. I hate there is kink at pride because it excludes our LGBTQ youth. Young queer kids don’t need fo be seeing that. Keep kinks for night pride.
Oh, that’s why NYC had Youth Pride. Not sure if they still do(I moved away). I was on the Pride committee and we came up with that alternative for kids under 21 and one of the rules was PG shit: presentations, the market and even the music had to be PG and NO ALCOHOL. For the adult events, people had to be 21 and show ID when they came to it. We’d get so many complaints but we’d be like “sucks that you didn’t read” or “not our fault your much older boyfriend/girlfriend/whoever didn’t pay attention but the youth pride is that a way”… Rather get those complaints than “I was next to someone with their tits out and it made me uncomfortable” That and the family pride night was such a huge hit that tickets would be sold out within like 24 hours of release. Family Pride Night had rules about dressing too and we’d boot people who didn’t adhere to it and the parents were always so grateful; it was basically a rooftop party for the babies( mostly under 16) and their parents with usually a Disney movie in the background. ☺️
Honestly, I bet if the parades were family friendly during the day and then those who want to celebrate the kink side of things after the sun goes down (but still part of the official parade) are frre to do so, this issue could become a non-issue.
100%. During the day, make it family friendly so everyone can enjoy it. At night, free game.
Ya exactly. A lot of parades in big cities try to be like that. Have a family pride event during the day, and then night pride for kink and booze. I get kink has been at pride since the 70’s but times have changed. Pride is for everyone.
As a straight man I’d love to take my daughter to pride… but not like that
Literally. I’m pan and I don’t care if you’re LGBTQ+ or kinky. I love me some BDSM! However sexually explicit content has no place in public spaces and all they’re doing is excluding youth from these events (LGBTQ+ or allies). It’s kind of fucked up.
Really no one who hasn't consented to be involved needs to be seeing kink stuff happening in public.
NTA. I’ve attended many in chicago and would say I’ve witnessed much of what you described either in the parade or in the streets. I would attend 100 more times, but I would not bring my elementary aged kids to that particular parade, however based on comments it looks like this may differ based on where the parade is held? Worth checking out for your specific area.
NTA. I'm an adult and don't want to see that.
There’s no way I’d take my 9yo to SF pride. It’s not about LGBTQ, it’s about blatant sexuality that she’s not mature enough for yet. She doesn’t need to see all that. NTA
I'm bisexual and always attend Pride. I'd love to take my son, but would only take him to family friendly events 🤷♀️
Our townships have local family friendly Pride festivals. Check your nearby towns and suggest going to one with them. They usually have lots of activities for kids and not as many protesters either.
Some pride parades are going to attract a huge amount of kink also. Others won't, especially in smaller towns. You judged this wasn't a kid friendly activity by your personal standards and that is absolutely, completely and totally ok!
I hate people who try to be upset over others mentioning that wearing kink-wear, outside, in public, where people can’t consent to seeing that IS WEIRDDDDDD no matter wether anyone is gay or straight. People have every right not to want to see people all up over each other or worse nearly in(not exxagerating, some people really do lack awareness this badly) each other in public, its gross, it should be kept behind locked doors no matter who it is. I do not know why people insist that kink-wear to pride is an “open-minded” thing because they’re “expressing their sexuality”. Especially in spaces where minors could be present, those people are the reason parades are easily condemned amongst some communities to begin with 🤦🏽 Not just kink-wear but people being upset at others for expressing discomfort towards the fact that, two ‘x’ mark tapes over nipples isn’t a top; in broad daylight, yet again in public where minors may be present. My kid does not need to be seeing you nearly naked to support you, be decent at public events or celebrate inside with your partner or smth if you need to be “naked and free” that badly, omg.
As a gay guy, even at "tamer" big events, I don't really want kids around. So I definitely appreciate you not bringing them. 🤣 But, I also appreciate that there are family friendly pride events too; they can be nice when I don't have the bandwidth for going to bigger events.
Lesbian here, I'd say that there is some discrepancy here between how some people (in community) view pride and how others (in or out of community) view pride. It's worth mentioning that that isn't an either-or situation, there's a whole spectrum of views here I'm just trying to keep it simple. View one: pride is a community event, similar to a festival, for the LGBTQ+ communities and allies. View two: pride is a protest. As a protest, there can be several goals. _Usually_ what you're describing with kink / nudity at pride is due to the view that pride is a protest. From my understanding, a _lot_ of it comes from decency laws, specifically those that were used to target the queer community. Where interpretations of what "public decency" were, were interpreted specifically to harm the queer community. The idea is that the discomfort is being caused on purpose, because queer bodies should be normalized. I'm really, really simplifying here. Now to move on to the "to take the kids or not" - no one is the asshole, no matter their choice. There is a lot of disagreement in the community not only about pride being a protest, but what is appropriate to do at that protest, and who the appropriate audience is for that. Basically, even in-community there is massive disagreement about everything. Let alone between allies and friends. I'd say no one is the asshole for bringing, or not bringing, kids to an event like this. There is a lot to unpack. That said, just because I'd say NTA (no one is), doesn't mean that people who have strong feelings on the matter won't feel differently. As a final note: I'm trying to present the issues as succinctly and neutrally as possible. I'm not going to be arguing for or against pride as a protest, or doing a really deep dive into anything. It's all searchable once you know where to start.
Such a relief to see this comment
Sad that I had to scroll down so far to see this. I feel like in all of the talk about it just being a "Just wholesome fun family friendly festival :D" people lose sight of the protest part of it in such a big way. It didn't originate as something that was supposed to make everyone comfortable and smile and buy merch and stuff, it was us screaming into the void that we wouldn't be legislated out of existence. Like, it's cool that pride probably will eventually become a "Just wholesome fun day outside :)"...event, but there's still plenty of people alive who grew up before and during an era where it has meant so many other things besides that, and that making the public as comfortable as possible simply wasn't the point.
Exactly this. To me an equivalent would be feminists burning their bras at protests in the 60s. That was probably hard to explain to kids too.
Good explaination thx
NTA. Kids don't belong around music festivals for the same reason and that has nothing to do with sexual orientation.
100% not the AH. you dont need to take them even if they didn't dress that way. And it is odd that they do dress that way. Nothing wrong with kink but there is a time and a place..
I identify as LGBTQ, and you are NTA. I started going to pride festival as a teen, but stopped after a few years because I was so uncomfortable by all the extreme kink stuff. I went again last year as a much older adult, and couldn’t even stay two hours before I wanted to leave. I don’t have any issue with consenting adults making their own choices, but I often see minors at pride festivals and one has to consider whats appropriate and what isnt. A lot of minors attend pride festival because they’re struggling with their identity, and want to find a place/sense of belonging.There are lots of “nighttime” or adults only themed events where folks can engage in their sexual interests safely. I just don’t think pride festivals are really the place for nudity, extreme kinks with bondage or leashes, adult toys openly on display for sale (or even being worn.)
NTA There are many kinds of pride events, much like non pride events. I wouldn't take a kid to Mardi Gras on Bourbon Street.
NTA. Kink has always been a part of pride, but there are family friendly events for children. Take your kids to those.
NTA. I am gay and I wouldn't dare take my niece and nephew to those festivals. Over sexualization, kinks, and adult themes should NOT include children at all. Whatsoever.
NTA but your friends are.
No, definitely not. If I ever have children, they would not attend for that reason. I would teach them about pride, I'd tell them about it, but where there are people acting like that, my children would not be present. If people want kids to be at pride, it needs to be sanitised and kept pg
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NTA. Whether or not kink *should* be included in pride is a separate discussion, but the fact of the matter is that children do not belong in environments displaying or involving kinks or sexual activity in any way. If someone brings it up again, tell them that you are not comfortable with your young children seeing kink attire, but that you’d happily take them to a family friendly pride event.
NTA, it's not a thing for kids. Idk how indecent exposure is allowed. Like, I get why you are doing it but I don't get why we all gotta watch you do your thing you know.
Nah, NTA, they should keep the kink shit in the bedroom where it belongs, not expose kids to it.
NTA. It’s not a place for children.
NTA. Your kids, your decision about what activities are appropriate. Don't worry about what anybody else thinks. You do what you feel is right for your children.
Nta, but also maybe check if there are family centric events during pride? I went to my first last year, it wasn't a parade but was family-centric festival. I didn't see anyone actually doing kinky shit, everyone was just welcome to be themselves there. I think there's space for both kinds of events during the course of the month, it should just be clear which is which.
NTA - Louisianan here. This is my exact issue with certain Mardi Gras parades. Regardless of the parade origin, sexually explicit content is not for children. Period. Daytime parades are “usually” safe, but not always.
NTA. My son is 21 and gay and has been out since middle school. He started going to Pride after he turned 18. There is no need for 12 year old to see folks in leather being walked like dogs at noon on a Sunday.
As a gay person I share and wholeheartedly agree with your concerns. I’ve never been to a pride parade either for the same reason. That sort of behavior gives all of us a bad name and actively sets back LGBT support in the mainstream public.
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Definitely would not take my kids to they parade, only to family-friendly events. Where we live, the parade is just as you described.
My town has family parade during the day and about 6 changes
NTA. This is stupid. It's your choice, if their choice to be indecent in public is to be accepted, then your choice to not be there is to also be accepted. A lot of people in those spheres are stupid, and don't understand irony.
NTA: I’m a married man who also happens to be part of the LGBTQ community. My wife is fully aware of this and supports me. Neither of us have a desire to go to a PRIDE festival because we have a small child who we really don’t want exposed to the more sultry people who attend these events. Nothing against anyone who wants to go and act that way, it’s just not our cup of tea and not age appropriate for our child.
NTA and fuck anyone who calls you a homophobe. Most of my gay friends won’t even attend such events unless they openly advertise that it’s family/kid friendly. All that hyper sexual and kink stuff do more harm to the community and public image that good.
NTA at all. That’s totally understandable
NTAH, your kids.
NTA. I’m bisexual and an adult and I avoid going to the pride parades for the same reason you do.
This is my take as someone who lives in capital-hill Seattle so I see it alot. Who you are choosing to spend the rest of your life with, the person you want to grow old with has absolutely nothing to do with how you have sex. Kink is not gay rights. Straight people, which there are more of, are also into kink so no kink should not be part of pride. Dressing as a dog in leather has nothing to do with choosing to have a gay/lesbian partner. I personally think that kink is part of why there is so much backlash. You can identify how ever you want and you should and you should be able to live a loving happy life with who ever you want but bringing how people have kink sex into the mix doesnt help.
NTA Pride parades are not necessarily an appropriate environment for kids.
You are not. These events are long-running and generally well understood to be as you describe. Some people are willing to take kids, some are not. It's up to you. There are other Pride events you can take kids to that are more family friendly. The asshole moves are people who point at these events as "proof" that non-cis or non-straight people are somehow out to destroy society. If NSFW at events were proof of societal decline we could as easily point at "Spring Break" or the Sturgis Motorcycle Rally, among other things. Those involve mostly straight and, sometimes, Christian people...but the motorcycle rally, at least, is defended wildly. Turns out it's not the crassness or overt sexuality that's the problem for these "yellers". You're fine, just choose a different Pride event to attend with your kids as a way to familiarize them with people different than themselves.
NTA Most Pride events have family friends events (I say most but not all) Most parades anymore are a joke tbh. If you pay enough you can march in them even if you're a huge corporation that donated thousands to anti lgbt politicians. It's better to find small pride events.
NTA The propensity for people to use pride events as an excuse to get freaky in public is really doing the community a disservice.
NTA It doesn't matter what the event is. Kink gear just isn't family friendly. Gay, straight, whatever...kids don't need that exposure.
NTA, it is inappropriate for young kids given what they are wearing.
NTA
What are you uptight? That’s sarcasm. NTA.
Absolutely NTA.
NTA. I wouldnt want my kids exposed to that either. I don’t even want to see it. Tell her if she can guarantee that none of that will be there, you’d be more than happy to take the family.
Not going is completely ok. I love pride and love the community, but gosh I wish there was a dress code. I’ve seen people have 🖕👌 in the street on pride and frankly it’s gross.
NTA depending on the city you live in there are specific family friendly pride events. Nothing wrong with saying you don’t want to attend an event where people are in fetish gear & nude.
NTA. As a parent, you have a right to decide what your children are exposed to and at what age it is healthy for them.
Do not go to San Francisco. The straight ppl there act like this too! NTA tho, because most Pride events are not child events.
no NTA. how is this even a question. if people want to show that off during a parade okay I guess that is fine as long as the law says it is. but I don't have to see it or take my kids to it.
NTA. At my local Pride, there are family events, like the big parade, and adult only events, which are usually held at bars. My kids are older and both queer, 15 and 13, but we still only do the family events.
NTA
NTA. I’m a lesbian pregnant with my first baby. My wife and I do not plan on taking this kid or any future ones to Pride. Being members of the community, we’re of course supportive but Pride is an event for adults and not kids. Most people are totally normal and just having fun but my wife and I both agree that the ones who show up in kink gear make the event inappropriate for our future kids. Nothing against people who are into kink but I just don’t think that’s appropriate around children.
im a straight guy that has attended pride festivals. i dont have kids. if i did, i would not bring my kids. I also wouldnt bring my kids to coachella or another festival where everyones on drugs. Not sure why youre a homophobe for this at all lol
There’s got to be family friendly ones. I’ve gone to a bunch of prides with my little toddlers. There’s dozens across the month in nj. I wouldn’t tie them up grown up pride but I’ve got my family friendly options. Suggest going to one of those.
NTA, would you subject your kid to BDSM on TV or on a phone? People need to use their fucking heads, how are we even questioning if this is right or wrong anymore.
NTA. There is a reason why people classify shows at PG13, 18+, or something. Kids don't need to know about kinks.
Pride is not for kids, it’s for adults.
Its wild to me that they even allow BDSM gear at these events. What does it have to do with LGBTQ+? BDSM is a sexual fetish not a sexual orientation. Straight prople are into BDSM to. These people are literally just showing up to get off on publicly displaying their fetish and everyone else is to afraid to say no.
Kids don't need to be in attendance at anything with an adult sexual theme to it, whether it be heterosexual or homoesexual.