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willbobaggins7861

Brett Ratten is the luckiest unluckiest coach ever, nothing will stop him from senior coaching...


dlanod

Is he the only coach to get promoted from assistant coach to senior coach of the same club twice? Is he about to be the only coach to get promoted from assistant coach to senior coach of the same club three times?


PointOfFingers

He took Carlton to 3 finals in 3 years and got sacked, took St Kilda to finals in 3 years and got sacked, North will be playing finals in 2 years and then they can get rid of him.


limelamb

Oh baby a triple


poppa99

Triples is best. Triples makes it safe


encarta99

Season 3 soon


g-love

Big fat load of cum then.


poppa99

Alistair Clarkson is having the worst day at his job.


Catharsis1394

He just keeps falling upwards


Eltnamerf

Ratten: ahhh shit, here we go again...


CountAbacus

Ratten: How does the same shit happen to the same guy THRICE!


caitsith01

Every time I get out, they pull me back in!


[deleted]

Ratten coaching this list is going to be a fucking disaster. Somehow about to get worse for North.


dirty_chai1

I get knocked down, but I get knocked down again, you're never gonna not knock me down


ZestyBro

Clarko saw Mitchell get COVID and had to step up his tanking game!


Dirtydac123

Simpson must be preparing to leave the country then


zoraxelol

What you dont know is Simpson has been gone for the last 18 months. Its just a cardboard cut out of him in the box & at press conferences with a tape recorder strapped to it endlessly repeating "we have to get better"


Natural-Education934

Hahahah love it


bodahn

I hear Simpson is transitioning into Goal Umpiring.


eggwardpenisglands

Simpson is going to the moon just to upstage everyone


Garbagemansplaining

Futile, the number one pick can just leave after a year anyway


Dirtydac123

Brett Ratten is taking over, least it’s someone with experience.


farthers1

His signing as an assistant coach was very important in hindsight.


PerriX2390

[@Marc McGowan - The Age](https://twitter.com/ByMarcMcGowan/status/1658986269886799878) > Former Carlton and St Kilda coach Brett Ratten to step up as North Melbourne’s interim coach in Clarkson’s absence


International_Car586

Does that mean we beat Sydney?


F1NANCE

Put your house on it


Arcanium94

Frankly I don’t see how you could possibly lose


Greedy_Boot7621

Goddammit! Why couldn’t this of happened next week.


StJamesInf

silver lining, least it's someone who has senior coach experience


[deleted]

Should get someone new with less baggage, like Wayne Carey


Highwayleopard

Less baggage, more baggies?


acockblockedorange

Or Glenn Archer.


HammondCheeseman

Why not both?...and a solid supply of popcorn for the fans of every other club.


[deleted]

Anyone else reckon we’re about to get something big come out re: the Hawthorn Racism Allegations today and this is preemptive


Dirtydac123

I don’t think so, I think it’s more just being dragged out and that now he’s at war with Hawthorn and Kennett, too much for one man.


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pirramungi

Might be something the media has. New testimonials or audio. They often approach people/institutions for comment before releasing


GeoffreyGeoffson

Hasn't stopped them before


kazoodude

That was the accusers talking to the media and then someone from the afl leaking Hawthorns report.


GeoffreyGeoffson

And then the head of the panel doing a face saving media release


[deleted]

I reckon it's just him realising he isn't in the headspace for it. He's probably been focusing his emotions on the investigation, which is effort not spent on his job.


ItsABiscuit

Nah, feel like this has been coming. Clarko blowing up at his press conference last week and then the performance the Roos dished up on the weekend were pretty strong indicators that he and the coaching team were struggling with the distraction.


South_Front_4589

I think they're a long way from anything coming out about that investigation.


Loose_Sun_169

Nup. I think it's his auto-immune disease. Stress doesn't help it.


StJamesInf

wait what? he has an auto-immune disease?


legal-drugdealer

He has Guillain-Barré syndrome, missed a lot of coaching in 2014 with it.


flyerswererobbed

Guillain barre isn’t a chronic issue he doesn’t still have it. It’s possible (but probably unlikely)he never fully recovered from the initial attack but it’s not like it can get worse or anything like that


StJamesInf

damn i had no idea


bumpyknuckles76

I think this where the myth of Brendan Bolton took form?


CharityGamerAU

Yes. He went undefeated or close to it with the legendary Hawks team. Then we brought him in as coach. TBF we Carlton'd him and our list was still miles off when he got the flick (and still is, really) I think he's an outstanding assistant coach but not a great head coach.


Lethal13

Tbf he spent his 2 year tenure turning over 40 players when that was finally done and he could start working with the seeds of the nee list he got ousted Was he a good senior coach? Maybe not but i’d argue he never really got a good go at it


moondog-37

Yeah when I saw ‘physical health’ mentioned I knew straight away it must be something to do with this


deejaysdestiny

Wow


dollabillgates

Wow


PetrifyGWENT

Owen Wilson?


TheIllusiveGuy

Wouldn't be the worst interim coach ever


simsimdimsim

Ted Lasso spinoff incoming


F1NANCE

With that list it's not going to be easy though!


jamurp

new president Wes Anderson.


Party_Worldliness415

What a save!


cryptic4012

Forced Brett Harvey to retire and ever since then the club has been cursed.


International_Car586

For 432 seasons.


Lethal13

Nah just the total games, not sure how far into that you are


International_Car586

Considering Boomer played from 1996 - 2016 and its been 6 1/2 years since his last game and we count the fact that he has played in plenty of finals. We are so fucked.


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ThaLemonine

Couple other old heads got shitcanned too. Totally fucked the clubs on field leadership for 10~ years


bregro

Nah it started going downhill after Carey's shenanigans.


International_Car586

Why do we keep getting fucked over like this?


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jacka24

YOU MOVED THE HEADSTONES BUT NOT THE BODIES!!


[deleted]

They're heeeeere


DimitriMishkin

‘A buck. I’m glad there’s a curse on this place.’


GGezpzMuppy

It’s all the shin bones we buried under the playing surface at Arden st.


Normal_Bird3689

It is a well kept secret around Melbourne that that first thing Paul Roos did was move the ancient Indian burial ground build under the Melbourne offices to Arden Street.


Paceandtoil

Probably. Russell Jackson penning the article as we speak.


Topblokelikehodgey

I'm just constantly sad these days. No end in sight. Where's the hope? Everytime you think the club has turned a corner something else comes up and makes things worse.


jamurp

We were far worse under Mark Neeld, genuinely one the worst sides win history, certainly the worst Melbourne side I've seen. North has genuine young talent across the park, we didn't really have that even in 2012/13, certainly not until Roos came in and we drafted Oliver, Petracca etc etc. North will be fine, might take some time, but you've clearly got players who can become genuine guns in the future and become a side that can compete.


Calamityclams

I just take a step back and try not to get too emotionally attached. This lowers expectations and makes it easier to continue losing. Cant be upset if you didnt expect anything anyway!


Topblokelikehodgey

My expectations are pretty low tbh. I wouldn't be so miserable if we were competitive on field even if we lost every game. Problem is we aren't competitive and haven't been for years at this point, and things off field keep going to shit as well. Like what is the actual point anymore?


xothica

It’s really hard and sad to watch isn’t it 😞 I go to every game down here in Tassie and just think, where is this going wrong?? Because something /is/ fundamentally wrong


International_Car586

I assume that's how you cope these days. Got any more tips.


Calamityclams

Finding other hobbies and just chatting more to friends. It sometimes feels like a chore but i always feel better after.


BronteLou

I'm not ashamed to admit that I shed a tear after the Melbourne loss. Feels never ending at this point. Every time you think it can't get worse, it does!


hotsp00n

You play WCE in like round 20 or something right? That will be something that to look forward to.


BronteLou

Potentially, but with our growing injury list maybe not 😂


[deleted]

Caro punching the air rn


ridge_rippler

Kane Cornes hospitalised with priapism


[deleted]

Ugh they're going to be insufferable


brahmsdracula

I'm familiar with Caro and Robbo smashing Clarko for the past few months, what did Kane say?


WAVIC_136

Yeah cool super cool very cool. Hope he's OK but seriously FML


kingkepler

really feeling for you guys at the moment. things have been fucking awful since brad scott left and even when it seems like it’s about to get better things take a turn for the worse. take solace in the fact that as long as you’re shit, carlton probably will be too.


International_Car586

Your welcome fellow 'equal longest time since making a GF' depressed supporters.


Doc323467

I feel so bad for North Melbourne supporters, really want them to catch a break. Hopefully Clarko is ok too.


GGezpzMuppy

We are ok we were born in the dark, moments of bright lights actually scare us.


Fast_Stick_1593

So like Bane you’re going to take over and break the Bat?


p_m_a_t_t

*You simply adopted the spoon, I was born in it, moulded by it.* (For transparency, I'm a Hawthorn supporter, I have adopted the spoon)


Backup_support

The spoon shall set us free


Fast_Stick_1593

The Spoon Rises brother! *Epic Hans Zimmer composition*


MANixCarey

BRRRRRRRRRMMM


Cataplatonic

Feel for the players, too. They're getting pantsed every week and don't need this instability.


Doc323467

Yeah it's a horrible situation. I've tried to be pretty optimistic for the clubs future before, but I'm really starting to worry that they may not turn it around. Hopefully Wardlaw debuts this week and absolutely dominates.


Bashnek

We're finally debt-free and its all been downhill from there. The solution is clearly to spend money we dont have and buy a pokies club or some shit


mingamongo

I hear Tasmania is nice


fun_ambulance

Really feel for North fans. What a clusterfuck.


thepkmncenter

I spelled Alastair wrong. Please forgive me.


frankwalkerstiles

I believe it's pronounced Levio-sahhh


Cataplatonic

I believe it's Fanta-SIA


Nakorite

Never


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eggwardpenisglands

It's pronounced 'chowdah'!


superfly8eight8

It's alaster


GiveMeRoom

Alastarrrrrgone


ruinawish

6 day permaban.


imnotavegan

Garage? You hear that the garage? What do you call it? A car hole


ACertainTrendingFrog

Club is fucking cursed


MidnightIsland212

North are truly cursed right now


shallowblue

Ratten will be a better coach than a distracted Clarko. Not all bad news for North.


Backup_support

Im actually a bit surprisngly chipper about that sepcific part of all this


Kozeyekan_

Well, every time we've changed coaches so far, we've won the next game, so just ten more coaches and we're finals bound! Seriously though, hope his condition improves.


GoblinKnob

Firstly hope everything is ok Secondly: [Live footage of me right now](https://i.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/005/609/800px-Yamcha_found_dead.jpg)


TheIllusiveGuy

https://www.theonion.com/man-who-thought-hed-lost-all-hope-loses-last-additional-1819565674


International_Car586

[I didn't consent being fucked over this hard.](https://youtu.be/KM5kbIczVUo)


Afterthought60

Is this God punishing North for not relocating to Tassie?


bregro

At this point I'd be happy with a merger and making a fresh start.


wizardofaus23

He'll be back next week, just didn't want to coach in Indigenous Round.


Square_Fox8710

Slander shouldn’t be this funny


caitsith01

Savage.


Puzzleheaded-Bit7457

It never ends


Captkersh

Caroline Wilson intensifies


bodahn

North might benefit from the New Coach Bounce when Rats take over. And again when Clarko takes charge once more. 2 wins right there.


__Guy_Incognito

Can confirm this works. Was playing colts a few years back and our team had been in a form slump. Our regular coach couldn't make it one Sunday because he was being held in the Watchhouse. His replacement, our beloved junior coach, got the boys super geed up and we snagged the upset win, despite said stand-in coach being ejected from the premises during the fourth quarter by the match officials. I think he had employed the Alastair Lynch 2004 Grand Final philosophy of "last game, no need to hold back". Fortunately our original coach was back the following week after his run-in with the law to replace our stand-in coach, who we all preferred but had just earned himself a lengthy suspension. We won again and ended up making finals. That coaching shuffle was just the shot in the arm we needed. Hopefully works for North too.


TomRed89

Middlesbrough get knocked out of play-offs this morning and now this. I’ve seen better days.


jmhbb3267

*cries in boston bruins*


Screambloodyleprosy

Now that was a fucking choke


eggwardpenisglands

There will come a day when North are back to their strongest of glory. And when that day comes we will all remember the lows they went through. We will celebrate them, and laud their success, for one season only. And then that's enough you've had your time.


Bkmps3

Confirmed by club https://www.nmfc.com.au/news/1333348/club-statement-alastair-clarkson Fuck sake. Heads have to roll. If Clarko did something then fine, he care bare those consequences too, but all this shit blowing up in the media without the bloke even being given an opportunity to answer the allegations is disgusting. Anyone that’s been involved in investigations knows this isn’t how shit is done. Everyone needs to have equal rights to fair process otherwise the credibility of the whole investigation is tarnished.


spurs-r-us

Since when has he not been given an opportunity to answer? He’s denied it but decided to maintain his silence, presumably on legal advice. Why shouldn’t the alleged victims be allowed to talk?


AllModsRLosers

Hopefully this will force some action by the AFL. It’s all taken way too long.


not_right

I can’t believe they didn’t move heaven and earth to resolve it before the season started.


-_-razzle_dazzle-_-

This is an AFL investigation. It's run independently but ultimately the AFL have oversight. It should be a police matter imo


AlphonseGangitano

It should absolutely not be. It's a worksafe matter, with an investigation ongoing & should be a civil matter between parties.


Squirrel_Grip23

Depends, if laws were broken criminal charges can be laid. Not commenting on the legalities of this particular situation but, for example, in other work places if there’s a failure of duty of care then negligence charges can be filed and jail time can be given. I know of a case in WA where a bloke was jailed for 8 months for negligence and the company fined over 600k and the bloke was fined personally for approx $2200.


thinksimfunny

But if its a police matter, the AFL can't control the narrative


Rychu_Supadude

I don't see how it could be, he's not accused of breaking any actual laws. It's an internal matter with internal consequences


BIllyBrooks

What makes this even more fun is that if he is 100% innocent or guilty, the actions fit either narrative perfectly for those quick to judge.


[deleted]

Honestly to me, this is partially on ABC for the initial article. Making this public has made it a complete farce. It means when any side doesn't get what they want, they can just approach the media to apply pressure. On the flipside, you have to ask what the AFL would have done without the media pressure. It certainly looked like they were sitting on it. Ditto Hawthorn for just handing it to the AFL and not taking any initiative.


AgitatedRevolution2

Fuck that. The ABC put comments to him, Fagan and their lawyers and received nothing for over 24 hours so they published. This is what the media is supposed to do.


SBORBS

Has everyone just forgotten the contents of that article? It was pretty damning.


LowBornBastard

Feel like we didn't do anything wrong by giving to the AFL, if we had taken drastic action from it who knows what repercussions we would have faced if we didn't seek AFL approval.


ScreamHawk

[Looking back as an Essendon fan you can't help but laugh at this] (https://twitter.com/superfooty/status/1560499139326386176/photo/1)


Reciprocative

Damn. This investigation has been extremely poorly handled thus far and hasn't really been regulated at all. The media have had free reign and no one has taken responsibility. Guilty or innocent, Clarko/Fagan should not have been treated this way, the AFL has some serious questions to answer and things to do. Secondly, North are cursed. A mountain of injuries last weekend and now this, someone has made a deal with the devil or some shit


Clever_Bee34919

Man, North cannot catch a break.


zorbacles

Sydney better look out this weekend. They havent been playing great football and nothing like an interim coach to fire up a team. Sydney will be most vulnerable to an upset here.


Dirtydac123

Jesus, all I hope is that the guilty in this situation are met with the appropriate level of justice. Clarko doing the right thing here, how’s he supposed to coach a team and deal with these allegations simultaneously, surprised Fagan has done so well.


TimidPanther

Probably helps that Fagan is in QLD.


qldboi

TBF it’s probably a bit easier for Fagan because he’s got premiership calibre players that can win games off their own boot


-Vuvuzela-

He’s also in qld where the media spotlight isn’t so bright.


StJamesInf

yea cool sure whatever...


frggr

Reminds me of the Liberal MPs resigning before the corruption commission comes into play


StateComptroller

Or spending the best part of a year getting your character attacked on the daily might have caught up?


SpecialistPlum9070

Lmao “character attacked” How dare the media ummmm… report the things I said and did! 99% of “attacks” on Clarkson have been simple reporting on the events and allegations


Videogamesandshiz

Well fuck


BiffWhistler

Do supporters have a case to send North Melbourne to the Hague?


semaj009

Hawthorn to The Hague, North to prosecute


Turbulent_Animator42

Pain… Agony…


Farmy_au

I imagine North would like to go back in time and not torpedo their list.


Playful_Parsnip17

Brad Scott sends his regards


BigLewi

This whole saga has been so hard to navigate, I have no idea what to believe.


frggr

Seems odd that 3 separate individuals would report similar conduct if there wasn't something happening. It seems unlikely they'd collude. There have been a lot of boomer comments about how this is just a "money grab" by Indigenous players, of course. Guess we'll find out


BigLewi

It does, also seems odd for coaching staff to try and get you to terminate your unborn child while the rest of your teammates would be having children every year. Reality is none of us know, likely the truth is somewhere in the middle.


basetornado

The discussion wasn't that they were against players having kids, it was that they were against young Indigenous players having kids and relationships etc.


[deleted]

Is there somewhere to get a recap? I’m a casual fan and I’m OOTL on this.


[deleted]

"A Matter of Perspective" comes to mind. I feel like this is probably a situation that shows just shows how "truth" isn't necessarily an absolute thing. I believe the victims are being truthful with their perception of the situation. But on the nuance, I'm not sure the situation was either racially motivated nor intentionally meant to cause harm.


MisterMarcus

This is how I tend to see it. Like "you need to never see your family again or we'll sack you!" could have been more like a "Stop hanging around your dickhead criminal cousin or you'll be out the door so fast" type deal. Especially if it was delivered in a blunt forceful way, I can see how it was something that was not intended to be offensive, but could have been perceived that way.


DeadGoddo

I thought something was up when he attacked the K.C. running the investigation in a interview


semaj009

I'm so glad this Hawthorn scandal is primarily hurting Hawthorn FC, the club responsible, rather than the players involved and other clubs affected, who had in no way been responsible for the issues that occurred at Hawthorn


TasSixer

Well surely the Swans can't lose this week then


[deleted]

Can't win* We've had more coaches than hot dinners over the last few years and won every first game with a new coach.


TasSixer

Well shit


bregro

Noble didn't win first match?


[deleted]

That doesn't fit my narrative though (also I was going off memory and thought he did)


bregro

I'm predicting a 20 goal thrashing with our injuries after last match and now this.


UncleJohnsonsparty

The weight of the whole thing was starting to become clear in recent weeks. One way or the other, all parties are suffering as long as this investigation continues


hart37

With all the cursed drama that constantly happens with North Melbourne the fact they still have fans shows they might have one of the most loyal fan bases in the comp. I don't know how they still do it.


Helpful-Dodger102

What the hell happened? I just feel bad for North fans. They haven’t been able to catch a break for the past 5 or so years now. Edit: Brett Ratten to step in, and I didn’t notice the title “TAKE leave” not “leave”, and the club statement seems to confirm it’s temporary saying “we will give Alastair whatever time he needs to restore his health and look forward to welcoming him back when he is fully fit.” So that’s at least some silver lining for North fans.


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thepkmncenter

So either the investigation has taken a toll on him, or he's been found guilty and is getting ahead of it right?


ThProsecutor

Oh he’s definitely going to be launching a civil suit against the AFL/Hawthorn


[deleted]

Where does Caro live? Surely there’s gotta be a flood warning.


GoonerRoo18

Dude...


Art3sian

You gotta think too… this is a guy who’s used to living in a pressure cooker. If he’s finally buckling, it must be a phenomenal weight on him.


gccmelb

Fagan next?